


We'll Live Forever Instead

by Sparrowlicious



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Supernatural Elements, Anal Sex, Biting, Blood, Frottage, Getting Back Together, Hurt/Comfort, Knotting, M/M, Mild Gore, Minor Character Death, Monster sex, Oral Sex, Possessive Kylo Ren, Protective Kylo Ren, Roadtrip from hell, Sex with a werewolf, Slow Romance, Switch Kylux, Werewolf Kylo Ren, Werewolves, alcohol mention, mentions of past m/m relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-19
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:06:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 50,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22318312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sparrowlicious/pseuds/Sparrowlicious
Summary: The last thing Armitage Hux expects is his past to catch up with him when his ex-boyfriend Ben Solo turns up at his workplace. Even worse is the revelation that the man not only changed his name but also claims to be a werewolf.Unforutnately for Hux this is only the beginning of Kylo Ren uprooting his life completely...
Relationships: Armitage Hux/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Armitage Hux/Kylo Ren
Comments: 53
Kudos: 204





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Some tags are for later chapters, stay tuned <3

“What the hell are you doing here,” Hux said loudly without thinking, startling one of the regulars at the counter. His entire body was so tense he had to put the coffee pot down so he wouldn’t grab onto it too hard and hurt himself or even worse, let go and break it and spill hot coffee everywhere.

With only the counter between them, Ben Solo stood in front of him – his ex-boyfriend back in high school. How he had even found the exact diner Hux worked at was beyond him and during his night shift as well but here he was, eyes wild as they stared at him, hair a mess and his body so damn big. And yet, he was still the most gorgeous person Hux had ever seen. Ben had only grown more attractive during the years. Hux didn’t know what to do.

_Armitage had waited all day to get his hands on Ben. Every hour they were apart seemed like torture even if he would never admit it. Ben was his very first boyfriend. Armitage had dreamed of having a boyfriend for many years but now it had finally happened. And Ben was so sweet and gentle._

_They were back in their usual corner somewhere at the back of the school where rarely anyone ever found them. It was the perfect make out spot for them. In the back of Armitage’s mind the question of attending prom was simmering but for now he only wanted to kiss his boyfriend._

_Ben pressed his entire body against him for a moment as he melted into the kiss, he was so cute. Armitage always marveled about how Ben could look so harsh at times and yet be soft. But then he pulled away and out of the kiss. Only the touch of their hands connected them and Armitage had a sinking feeling as he saw Ben’s eyes, the look on his face. Something wasn’t right._

“ _Armie, we need to talk,” Ben said quietly_ _and Armitage’s heart sank._ _He didn’t like this._

_No, no, no, no, was all Armitage could think. He opened his mouth but there were no words that came out. Ben was his first boyfriend, he wasn’t ready to let go yet._

“ _We need to break up. Because …,” Ben said, his voice shaky and Armitage could see in his eyes that he didn’t want it. He was devastated either way._ _He_ _spun some hair-brained tale of how he had to deal with personal issues. Something really stupid that Armitage didn’t believe._ _It was the last time he had seen Ben Solo. He was gone the same evening, same as his family._

“Hey, Armitage,” Ben said. “Can we talk? Please?”

His voice had a desperate edge to it as if it weren’t him who had ended their relationship all those years ago. He stood there as if they were the only two people in the room.

Someone in the background ‘oo’d’ at them and Hux sighed in annoyance. At the very least it was a slow night, which usually meant only about 70 % of the booths were full, and the nosiest of their customers weren’t in. At least not yet. Those usually came in early in the morning for breakfast after a long night of partying. No one called him ‘Armitage’ here. Of course the regulars who had heard Ben were staring and waiting for how this might turn out. The diner was a good spot for a little drama. Usually it wasn’t Hux’s drama though.

“Sit your ass down and wait, I can’t go on break right now,” he snapped before he went back to pouring coffee. Technically he could ask his coworker to cover for him but his mind was abuzz with questions he didn’t want to voice. Instead he focused on his work, pouring the coffee he had abandoned a moment earlier. He knew there were some food orders he’d have to carry to a table before they got cold.

With a low grumble Ben sat down at the counter, his eyes immediately fixed on Hux. They were still beautiful eyes.

“Can I have some coffee? I got money,” he said. Wordlessly Hux grabbed a fresh mug and filled it and somehow managing not to spill anything despite how hard he put it on the counter in front of Ben. He didn’t even ask Ben if he wanted milk or anything, especially since both was already on the counter, instead Hux was already off to a table where the patrons wanted the bill. The looks they were giving him were curious but thankfully enough they didn’t pry. At least not for now. All the way over to the table Hux felt like he was watched but when he looked quickly over his shoulder he saw Ben facing the counter instead of him. It was odd.

“Are you alright, sweety?” one of the men at the table said. Hux had seen them around plenty of times, he even knew that one of them worked as a drag queen at a local club. Derry Kween, he remembered. That was the man’s drag name but he didn’t know what else he was known as. Not that Hux had ever been to a show but Derry had come here in drag once or twice before which always lightened the overall mood at the diner. They were in the ‘gay’ part of town after all but even then a drag queen like Derry wouldn’t walk around in heels without some friends as backup. At the moment he was with Dave, his boyfriend.

Hux sighed. Ben wasn’t someone he could talk about with a complete stranger, especially not with Ben being in the same room, possibly overhearing everything. He didn’t even know yet if he wanted to listen to what Ben had to say, or why he was even this angry since it was so many years ago. Still, the hurt lingered.

“I’m fine. He’s just an old flame… it’s nothing serious,” he said quietly, bordering on whispering.

“I see,” Derry said. “You know, you should come by the club some time. Watch my show. I’m sure it will cheer you up. Maybe you’ll even find a new flame.” He winked at Hux.

Hux wasn’t the type of guy who had money to spend on clubbing or on watching drag shows even though there were times when he had really, really wanted to go. It was entertaining and there was something soothing, something safe to be among ‘his own’ people. But his bills were more important than entertainment and the club he worked at for some nights also got him enough phone numbers by way too many unattractive men. But picking anyone up at his workplace wasn’t something he wanted to do since it had ended up messy in the past and Hux could do without messes. Even if one big mess was sitting behind him at the counter. He’d deal with that too.

“As much as I’d like to come see your show I don’t think I can spare the money at the moment. Sorry,” Hux said, an uncomfortable frown visible on his face. Maybe his schedule allowed him to at least go to Derry’s charity show which also featured some other queens from their local community. The previous year Hux was busy working at the bar. The guy he was dating back then went alone and told him all about it afterwards and shared some photos. It looked great and Hux deeply regretted not being there.

Derry Kween gave him a soft pat on the cheek, in the meantime the other man at the table counted out money, adding a visibly big tip to what they owed. Hux felt warmed by the gesture.

“Just ask for Miss Chanel, darling. She’ll get you a front row seat on the house,” Derry said, then as he got up he leaned in closer.

“Wished we could help with that hunk over there but my specialty is death drops, not dropping dead. Sorry, honey.”

“Thank you. It’s okay though, I can handle him,” Hux said somberly. He knew he could be an asshole sometimes. Who was he kidding? A lot of times, really, especially since some regulars really enjoyed his attitude and left him a bigger tip for it. And yet, people still gave a crap about him just because he was a gay man working at a rainbow diner. If only he had this sort of community earlier in his life, maybe he wouldn’t have turned out to be such an ass. There was no knowing and no use crying over spilled milk. Instead, Hux made the best he could of his situation… and personality.

Hux saw Ty, his coworker and only other waiter for the night, gesture to him with a tiny nod. It was a subtle way of letting Hux know they had to talk about something even if it wasn’t an emergency. Hux more or less strolled casually back to stand behind the counter where he took the time to refill some nearly empty coffee mugs of their patrons, including Ben’s. It couldn’t be anything serious because Hux could tell by now if it were. He and Ty had been working together for some months now but Hux had never shown much of a personal interest in them since he liked keeping his meager private life apart from his work life. Unsurprisingly Ty was slightly shorter than him, had a better personality and was well-liked by most costumers. Even if some managed to misgender them because of their ever-present three-day stubble despite their ‘they/them’ button. It was a work in progress, even in the gay community.

Ty bumped shoulders with him, and whispered: “You can take your break now if you like so you can talk to lover boy over there.” Ty smirked at him and Hux had to suppress a groan. He wasn’t ready to talk to Ben Solo or even about him for that matter. Maybe he would never be ready.

“Your call,” Ty added quietly before turning back to work. Despite it being late at night there was still food being ordered which Ty carried to one of the tables.

Ben’s eyes briefly met his over the divide of the counter. He was so damn handsome despite the scar on his face and his overall weathered look. Something about him was just so damn attractive. It was clear he was watching Hux’s every move, at least while he was in sight. There was something about his eyes that Hux knew should scare him, instead he was annoyed because he liked looking at them way too much.

Hux bit his lip as he searched for something to do behind the counter so he topped up coffee mugs. Usually this would be a good time to make conversation and maybe sell some more food but in Ben’s presence Hux found himself strangely mute. Slow nights were usually good for small talk, even if Hux wasn’t very good at it. But their customers usually didn’t care since he was a cute ginger twink and his pert ass caught more attention than any of the words he could or would ever say. He knew better than to complain though, his ass helped him with getting a good amount of tips without having to bare it and Hux was grateful for it. He’d wiggle that ass if he had to. At this point he had barely any shame left about it.

The moment Ty was back behind the counter Hux gave them a nod and said, “I’ll take 10 minutes.”

It was really no use to try and avoid this even though he was still not sure what to say to Ben Solo.

“Sure. Take a jacket, it’s cold outside,” Ty said. They offered Hux an encouraging smile and Hux knew he needed it. It was outright unfair, really. If Hux had known Ben would come here, maybe he could’ve prepared for this. Instead he was pushed into this situation without any warning. Typical. As if is his life hadn’t been like this since he could remember.

Hux gave Ty a nod before grabbing his own coat, he noticed from the corner of his eye how Ben left some money on the counter before vacating his chair. It was way too much and Ben didn’t even wait for his change. Hux felt conflicted for a second but he was also painfully aware how he and Ty were splitting tips by the end of the night and adding spring onions to his ramen noodles sounded really great after a long week of eating bland food to save money for his light bill.

Without looking back Hux walked out the door with Ben trailing after him. Ben’s heavy steps sounded terribly loud despite the noise of the diner. When the door shut behind them, Hux walked over to the side of the building which lead into the back alley where the diner’s trashcans were so they wouldn’t block the entrance. The cold air bit Hux’s skin immediately and his breath was visible in the air as he let out a deep, shuddering breath. He wrapped his arms around himself before turning to Ben, hoping to retain at least some heat.

“What do you want?” he said to Ben who had both his hands in the pockets of his battered leather jacket. In Hux’s mind there was no real reason for Ben to look him up expect for money which Hux had none of. If Ben Solo was looking for a loan that didn’t come from mommy and daddy he was definitely barking up the wrong tree. Other things Hux could think of were criminal activities which he didn’t want to be part of.

“I know it’s been a long time,” Ben said, one of his hands came up to brush his hair back. Hux knew this gesture. Ben was nervous. His dark eyes were as intense as Hux remembered them, maybe even more so.

“14 years,” Hux said and couldn’t help but sigh. If only he could forget about it but Ben Solo had to remind him of it. Men came and went in Hux’s life but he had never loved anyone like he had loved Ben Solo back when they were in high school these many, many years go. It was ridiculous. Ludicrous even that he could have such intense feelings back when he was a teenager but not as an adult.

“Right. 14 years,” Ben said. “I know back then I didn’t explain anything. At least not in a good way. It’s still not easy to explain.”

Hux’s eyebrows drew together. He couldn’t believe this. Even 14 years later Ben Solo still couldn’t talk plainly with him. His head was starting to hurt ever so slightly.

“Spit it out already, Ben. You made a weird excuse back then and now you’re still fumbling your words. Why are you here? To talk about the past and make us both feel shitty about it? Congratulations, you accomplished your goal!” Hux turned and was ready to leave Ben where he was when Ben’s voice cut through the cold air:

“I’m a werewolf.”

Hux whipped around, staring at Ben, his mouth opened and closed involuntarily. He could feel his jaw becoming tense.

“Of all the dumb reasons men left me in the past this is by far the most outlandish one,” he said, his face burning with anger as he looked at Ben. But Ben didn’t look like he was joking. He was clearly insane. As always, luck was never on Hux’s side.

“It’s true. Also, my name is Kylo Ren now. Not Ben,” he said. Hux took a breath, swallowing the question of why Ben, no, Kylo, would pick such a name but the past years living and working in the queer community taught him not to question it when someone changed their legal name. It was still rather out there as far as names were concerned. Hux shook his head to re-focus on Kylo’s previous statement.

“What the fuck are you talking about, werewolves don’t exist,” Hux said, his lip curling into a snarl. Of all the stupid things Kylo could claim, this was the worst one because it was most definitely made up. Hux had the hardest time not to shout outright at him. Riling up insane people was never a good idea in his experience.

“No, it’s true,” Kylo said. “I came into my powers at around 16 and it was harder to control them. That’s why my family moved away to a safe place where I couldn’t hurt you or anyone else. I couldn’t just leave without at least ending things between us even if I didn’t want to.”

Despite not believing any of the words Kylo said, Hux could see in his face he really meant it. That was if Kylo hadn’t learned how to be a better liar in these past 14 years. As a teenager it was easy for Hux to see through him, at this point in time he wasn’t so sure anymore. Or maybe Kylo was simply delusional or insane like Hux had already expected. A dangerous lunatic. Hux contemplated if he could sell all his furniture to move away to somewhere else but he knew he didn’t have that kind of money.

Kylo licked his lips. He then looked around before retreating into the shadows of the nearby alley.

“I’ll prove it to you,” he said before moving out of the street light. Hux rolled his eyes, wondering how cheap Kylo Ren’s werewolf disguise would be. He followed Kylo into the alley although he knew he shouldn’t, diving into the shadow where he immediately felt uncomfortable. It was one of the things Hux never liked about the diner – this side-street where anything might happen, even though they took out the trash through the backdoor. Still, someone could always linger in the shadows.

Hux thought his eyes played a trick on him because Kylo’s face changed into that of a wolf while his body stayed the same. Maybe he was overworked. It had to be a trick, a sleight of hand, anything.

Hux stepped closer and held out his hand. Kylo didn’t even flinch when Hux’s fingers touched his face, instead he turned into the touch, his eyes closed slightly. The fur was soft like that of a real animal. It was impressive. But then Hux slightly tugged here and there, trying to pull the mask off. It looked too real. Kylo’s hand lightly grabbed his arm, causing Hux to look down and see how his hands had changed into dark-furred claws. Hux slapped a hand on his mouth so he wouldn’t scream. Slowly he took a step back, his hand trailing off of Kylo’s face.

It was real. Hux’s heart was racing as were his thoughts. He stared at Kylo’s wolf face, his eyes reflected eerily in the half-light. But he realized shakily if Kylo had wanted to hurt him he would’ve done so by now. Still, he was terrified.

“Alright, I believe you,” Hux said and found his hands were shaking ever so slightly. How could they not? A supernatural creature was standing in front of him and even though Kylo’s face changed back the knowledge of him being a potentially vicious beast was still there. Fear was rooted deeply into his heart at this point.

“So what now? Don’t you have a perfect life as a werewolf with your werewolf family?” Hux wrapped his arms back around himself, suddenly remembering he wasn’t exactly warm despite forgetting about the cold for a second or two. He hoped Kylo couldn’t tell he was shaking from seeing a werewolf instead of the cold.

Kylo scoffed at him.

“I don’t have a perfect life. I did stupid things, ran with a bad crowd,” Kylo said as he slowly advanced on him. Hux barely stopped himself from flinching back. His big, warm hands soothed over Hux’s ever so slightly shaking arms. Hux let him even if they couldn’t completely ward off the cold.

“I never stopped thinking about you. Of all the people I ever met you were the best of all of them. All these years I kept thinking about you constantly,” Kylo said, his smile sweet and his eyes big. It would be too easy to take him back, forget everything but Hux couldn’t stand it. He couldn’t stand getting potentially abandoned again or worse, killed because Kylo still didn’t have his werewolf side under control and besides, they were both grownups. Just as Hux, Kylo probably had changed a lot in these past 14 years. Hux rolled his eyes. At the back of his head there was a feeling of apprehension. He had known Ben Solo but he didn’t know Kylo Ren. And Kylo Ren acted like a man who tried to manipulate him. All the signs where there. It didn’t exactly help how Kylo Ren could turn into a monster and eat him alive if he wanted to.

“You were thinking about me every day but it took you this long to come and find me?” Hux said and shook his head. He couldn’t even look at Kylo, instead he looked down so he wouldn’t have to see his pleading face and his beautiful eyes.

“Your family was gone without a trace and so were you. Don’t think I didn’t try to find you but you didn’t even reach out to me once. I didn’t even know if you and your parents were still alive.” Hux sniffed. Back then his options weren’t great. Looking up the Organa-Solo family wasn’t something he could do back when he was a boy thanks to the limited options. Later, his search yielded no results whatsoever. It was as if they had dropped off the face of the Earth altogether.

Hux looked back up to him, stared into his face, into those dark, soulful eyes.

“What do you want, Kylo? I don’t have money you can borrow so you better go back to your parents and beg them for an allowance,” he said, not knowing where the courage for his words came from. A quiet sob tore from Kylo’s throat, his voice sounded laden with emotion.

“I don’t have anywhere else to go. Please, Armitage, let me stay with you just for a little while,” Kylo said.

“It’s Hux now. No one calls me Armitage around here,” Hux said, his eyes hard as was his voice. So this was the thing he wanted. Kylo was broke and homeless. For a moment he forgot his fear.

“Go back to your parents. I bet they’ll take you back with open arms. There’s no reason for you to come begging me.”

“Please,” Kylo whispered, his hands were suddenly clenching harder into Hux’s jacket, causing him to flinch this time. “I can’t go back. I have nowhere else to go.” He shook his head insistingly.

“Why should I care?” Hux said, shrugging Kylo’s hands off of him and being surprised he was able to.

“I can give you power, Hux. I can make you a werewolf too if you want. You’d be strong, always healthy, live longer. I can do that for you,” Kylo said. Even though his hands were no longer on Hux’s arms they were still up, ready to touch him again. His eyes were wild with desperation. He looked like a drowning man.

“We’d be unstoppable. Two alphas together.”

Hux chuckled humorlessly.

“I don’t want any supernatural power you pathetic bastard,” Hux said. He stayed silent for a moment, waiting for Kylo to say anything else but instead he looked at him with pleading eyes. Hux sighed deeply, he rubbed a hand over his face and pinched his eyes closed for a moment. This terrible man had him pinned.

“Fine, you can sleep on my couch but only if you keep your hands, paws, whatever to yourself,” Hux said and shortly afterwards found himself swept up into a tight hug which knocked the breath out of him. Maybe this was it, maybe Kylo decided it was time to squeeze the life out of him despite the generous offer.

“Thank you, thank you, you won’t regret it,” Kylo muttered where he pressed his face against Hux’s shoulder. He was regretting it already but at least he knew he wasn’t dying. Yet. Maybe Kylo could sleep on a bench in the nearby park instead? No, Hux had already said yes.

“What did I just say?” Hux pressed out, overwhelmed by the closeness. At least Kylo was warm even if he was about to crush his ribcage.

“Sorry,” Kylo said as he let go of him, he smoothed down Hux’s jacket until he moved out of reach.

“Stop it already,” Hux said, feeling the warmth in his cheeks. It bothered him how a simple touch affected him. It wasn’t as if Hux didn’t have any relationships with men in the recent past. But Kylo’s presence made him feel all sorts of things which was rather annoying. It wasn’t only the fear of being ripped apart by a vicious beast. Kylo’s human body was terribly hot. He told himself it was just an old memory resurfacing together with Kylo’s unfairly attractive features. He shook it off. Kylo’s body warmth was gone, all Hux had left was a man who could turn himself into some sort of wolf creature.

“You’ll have to wait until I’m done with work. It’s at least another two hours, maybe longer,” Hux said. He doubted they would be swamped by the end of his shift but he couldn’t completely rule it out either.

“If you don’t want to stay at the diner you can just go somewhere else. There’s a bar down the street. I think there’s a strip club somewhere too, if you’re into that sort of thing,” Hux muttered as he turned away and took a few steps out of the alley with Kylo trailing behind him. It would be easier if Kylo simply left and never came back. Maybe he could go howl at the moon or something.

“Oh, I’m okay staying at the diner,” Kylo said. “There’s a newspaper I didn’t read yet and your coffee is good.”

Hux scoffed. “Ty made it, not me. They’re better at coffee than I am.”

Kylo didn’t comment on this dig Hux did on himself and also stayed silent as they entered the diner. Hux knew some of the regulars where watching both of them closely but he tried not paying too much attention. He’d have to deal with the bickering eventually. It didn’t matter much since at the end of the day they were strangers. Instead Hux was back behind the counter after taking off his jacket.

“Just in time,” Ty said and pressed a tray of food into his hands, gesturing to one of the tables which held a party of four. Slightly disorientated Hux stumbled over without spilling a thing, the group hollering at him in delight. They were probably party-goers who came for a midnight snack. None of them looked like they were anywhere near the age of 21 but they were having fun. As long as they didn’t disturb the peace and paid their bills Hux didn’t really care about it. Things were best when they didn’t have to call the police which didn’t even show up most of the times. They were just a gay diner and who cared about them anyway?

“Hey red, I got a nice spot here on my lap so you can feed me,” one of them said and his friends laughed. It wasn’t the first time a guest reduced Hux to his hair color and it wouldn’t be the last. Same with his pretty face. Without missing a beat he said: “Sorry, I don’t go out with underage virgins.”

The other guests at the table hollered some more while Hux put down the food. They overpowered the guy who had hit on Hux with volume so he couldn’t even try and explain himself. Instead of paying him any mind Hux did his job and left them to their food. They probably would tip badly but the grin on Ty’s face was worth it, as was the feeling he got out of it.

While Ty took up new orders Hux was back behind the counter to refill some coffee mugs. Kylo looked at him with humor in his eyes but didn’t say anything before turning back to the newspaper he was reading. Hux couldn’t help but feel some way or another about it, instead of dwelling on it he set up a new pot of coffee since they were running low again.

“Do you always tease your guests,” Kylo said quietly from behind his newspaper as Hux was wiping part of the counter.

“Only when they deserve it,” Hux said. He found it easy to fall into a semblance of banter with Kylo. Too easy. Hux had to remind himself that they weren’t Ben and Armie anymore.

Kylo kept leaving coins on the counter which Hux pushed back at him. Paying for refills wasn’t a thing at the diner and he wasn’t ready to extort Kylo for whatever money he had. Probably not a lot since he was trying to bunk up with him instead of getting a hotel room.

By the end of Hux’s shift Kylo probably read the newspaper over a dozen times but he still seemed invested in it until the bitter end. Apparently it was better than striking a conversation with the fellow patrons at the counter or worse, annoying Hux even further.

“Drink up, we’re going home soon,” Hux said as he took up some empty mugs while Ty divided the tips behind the counter. Kylo took the longest gulp Hux had ever seen someone take from a coffee mug before putting it down empty. Hux snatched it up before finally turning in his apron. He washed his hands one last time when Ty stepped close to give him his part of the tips.

“You take care, you hear? If that oaf gives you any trouble … you know, you can always crash on my couch,” they said, casting a glance back where Kylo was standing across the counter, waiting for Hux to come along. As if to rile Kylo up, Ty gave him a kiss on the cheek before returning to work. Hux chuckled lightly as he touched the place Ty’s lips had rested on for a mere second.

Maybe it was his imagination but Hux thought he could hear a low growl behind him. He shrugged it off hoping Kylo wouldn’t do anything stupid in public and put his jacket on, bidding Ty and the patrons goodbye as he left the diner together with Kylo Ren.

“So… are you two dating,” Kylo said the moment they were out the door and Hux wished he could be surprised about this question.

“Wouldn’t you like to know….” Hux muttered and smirked as an answer at first but then under Kylo’s gaze he relented.

“No. I’m into men, Ty is non-binary even if they have a bit of a beard. Why would you even care if I’m seeing someone?” he said. “I agreed to let you sleep on my couch, not to go on a date with you or invite you into my bed.”

Kylo grumbled next to him, not unlike the sound Hux had heard at the diner. It was a cold night out and Hux wrapped his arms around himself. At this rate his fingers and his face would be numb by the time he was home which wasn't out of the ordinary this time of the year.

"Where's your car?" Kylo said after they were walking for about ten minutes. Hux scoffed reflexively. This wasn’t the first time a man asked him this and he was sure it wouldn’t be the last.

"Can't afford it," he said. He couldn't even afford Uber or a taxi.

Hux could feel Kylo's stare on him but instead of saying anything Kylo audibly shrugged out of his leather jacket, a second later Hux felt its warm weight on his shoulders. He turned his head to protest but Kylo's intense gaze stopped him.

"You need it more," Kylo said. Hux muttered his thanks. It felt hard to stay mad at Kylo but he was sure his resentment would return eventually. As would the fear he had felt at the appearance of Kylo’s wolf head. For now Hux enjoyed the warmth and Kylo's familiar smell. It was the same as it had been all those years ago. Hux was surprised he could even remember it at all. Meanwhile, Kylo didn’t seem to mind the cold where he walked next to him. Hux wondered if it was because he was a werewolf or maybe he just hid being affected by the cold well enough. Some people were good at it. Hux had met quite a few men who played the macho but then stuck their feet between his legs to warm them up. It was annoying as hell. The way he acted Hux could certainly see him go all macho. Meanwhile, Hux didn’t care much about showing off or pretending he was something he was not.

“How far away is your place?” Kylo said after a while. They were out on one of the busier streets and Hux didn’t care about the curious looks he got for wearing two jackets.

“At least half an hour on foot,” Hux said. He didn’t mind walking but Kylo gave him a look and he might have said “Really?” in a sarcastic voice but he didn’t. Walking wasn’t all that bad, Hux knew. At least it was better than standing around which he did enough at his work. But the real prize was finally getting home and sit his ass down. Hell, his bed sounded like the best place on Earth right about now, even if he won’t have anyone in it with him. He certainly didn’t plan on inviting Kylo into it.

As the streets became less frequented Hux was secretly glad for Kylo’s presence. The last stretch to his flat always seemed cold and dangerous this time of the night. He wouldn’t possibly admit it but there were times Hux wished he had someone with him or that he at least lived in a safer part of town but he couldn’t really afford it. So instead he carried mace on his person and had a knife sewn into the sleeve of his thin jacket. He wouldn’t need it tonight, not with a dangerous werewolf at his side.

Finally in front of the building Kylo waited patiently for Hux to unlock the door. The lock was unruly, slightly rusted and it always took a bit of an effort to pull the door open and Hux did manage to suppress a grunt as he did, like he did every day. Even after telling his landlord repeatedly the door still got stuck it stayed unfixed despite his complaints.

“Come on,” Hux said over his shoulder to Kylo who stood idly behind him. Inside the building Hux wordlessly shrugged Kylo’s leather jacket off and handed it back. They went up the stairs since Hux couldn’t quite stomach sharing the tiny space of the elevator with Kylo and by the time they got to Hux’s floor he felt warmed up. Sure, he was slightly out of breath but at least he didn’t have to embarrass himself being too close to Kylo. Hux felt the threat of his old feelings for the man warming up in the back of his mind and he couldn’t allow it. Especially not now that he knew Kylo was a werewolf. It was a momentary lapse after a long day of work. Even with Kylo’s excuses and explanations he still didn’t feel like Kylo had earned his forgiveness yet.

Inside the flat Hux toed his shoes off and put up his jacket. Kylo followed suit without saying anything, at least not until Hux turned on the lights. One of the bulbs on his ceiling wasn’t working so the sparse living area wasn’t perfectly illuminated. He’d have to fix that at some point when he could spare the money which wouldn’t be anytime soon.

“So this is where you live,” Kylo said quietly as he dared to look around. Finally in his own home Hux felt tired enough to let it slide should it have been an insult. He didn’t even know if he had another clean blanket for Kylo. Hell, Hux didn’t even know if he owned more than one blanket.

“You see the couch here?” Hux said, “this is where you’re going to sleep.”

“Yeah. I know,” Kylo said and sat his ass down. The low living room table was still crowded with books Hux had borrowed from the local library. Despite owning a small TV he preferred reading to watching anything for the lack of interesting channels. If he had the money he’d at least get some sort of history of discovery channel.

“Just stay here,” Hux said. “And don’t touch anything.”

There wasn’t much room to cross as Hux went into his tiny bedroom which barely held his bed and wardrobe which was really just an old clothes rack and a low cabinet. Hux opened the bottom drawer, hoping to find anything useful but all there was were his other sheets. He only had these and the ones currently on his bed. It couldn’t be helped now, could it?

With the sheets in hand Hux reappeared in the living room to find Kylo exactly where he left him. It seemed to good to be true that the man actually listened to him.

Kylo gave him a puzzled look as Hux dropped the sheets next to him onto the couch.

“I don’t have an extra blanket,” Hux said. He was unmoved by the prospect of Kylo possibly freezing out here with only some thin sheets to cover him. Should’ve taken a room at a motel if he wanted a real blanket.

Kylo didn’t look worried or annoyed, instead he took the sheets and spread them out like a blanket. He looked at Hux expectantly.

“Do you want to cuddle a little?” he said with a chuckle and an inviting gesture to the spot next to him. Hux scoffed but felt his cheek warm nontheless.

“I’ve been working all day, I’m going to turn in. Don’t turn the volume of the TV up too high if you want to watch,” he said. Kylo looked a bit deflated, disappointed even but instead of arguing he only told him good night.

Leaving Kylo to his own devices Hux went through the motions of cleaning himself up before dropping into bed like a stone. He drew the blanket over his head as he buried his face into the thin pillow for a moment with a quiet groan.

Of course his past had to come back to haunt him. Of course it had to be Kylo Ren, his first love, his first heartbreak.

_Reluctantly Armitage followed Ben Solo into a secluded area behind the school. This wasn’t the first time a bully had pulled him away from whatever he was doing to try and extort money or some other nonsense but this time it felt different. Ben Solo didn’t seem so sure of himself._

“ _Fine, I’m here,” Armitage said. “What do you want? If it’s money then I’ll just walk away.”_

“ _Wait, what?” Ben said, visibly flustered. “No, that’s not… That’s not what I wanted.” He kicked at the dirt beneath his feet. Armitage was getting impatient. He had to be home soon or his father would have a fit. Usually his father was only interested in his comings and goings when he was home which wasn’t often. This week he was stuck working from home. So in short, not an ideal situation for Armitage’s free time._

“ _So what is it, Solo?” Armitage said, getting up into Ben Solo’s face. He was maybe an inch or two taller than Ben._

“ _I just wanted to ask you out!” Ben blurted out. Armitage stared at him in confusion and surprise. This had to be a joke, right? But inspecting Ben Solo’s face he saw that his blush reached the tip of his ears which peeked out from his unruly mop he called hair. Armitage chuckled lowly._

“ _Really?” he said. Armitage knew he might get his face punched in but if Ben Solo wanted to play, Armitage might as well get some fun out of it. They were still standing close so Armitage put his hand on the side of Ben’s head as he leaned in close and kissed him. Ben gasped against him, then his eyes slid shut and he tried kissing back clumsily. Armitage pressed his tongue against Ben’s lips and it slipped in easily although Ben didn’t know what to do with his own. Armitage could taste the bubblegum Ben had chewed earlier. Ben’s hands reached out and clenched in his shirt, unsure where else to put them._

_Armitage slowly pulled back with Ben chasing him slightly._

“ _That was…,” Ben muttered, his voice slightly broken. “That was amazing. I never kissed anyone before.”_

_Armitage didn’t say it but it was his first time as well. He simply had had enough time to fantasize about what it might be like to kiss someone which included mouthing at the air. But thankfully Ben Solo didn’t know any better and he didn’t need to find out either._

“ _I guess we can kiss a lot more if we’re going out,” Armitage drawled. If Ben’s face was red before it was bordering on crimson now._

“ _Please,” Ben whispered._

Hux didn’t think back to Ben that often. He hadn’t. How could he when Ben broke his heart? Kylo’s claim about thinking of him so often didn’t matter all that much to him. Anyone could claim that easily.

“So stupid,” Hux muttered to himself as he lifted his head from the pillow to fluff it up before sinking down into it again. He shut his eyes hoping to fall asleep soon. Hux sure was tired enough but his thoughts kept spinning back to the man on his couch. Nothing could stop Kylo from coming into Hux’s bedroom if he really wanted to. Except that he apparently didn’t want to fuck this up.

Still, Hux lay there with his heart racing. He fantasized about it for a moment. Kylo Ren was an attractive man and if it weren’t for his feelings Hux could probably imagine inviting him into his bed. Hell, if they didn’t share a past he probably would ride him into the sunset. Kylo looked massive, he could lift him easily. The thought made Hux’s cock throb in his pants. He quickly reminded himself that Kylo Ren was a werewolf. A dangerous creature who could rip him apart easily. For some reason this turned Hux on even more. He wondered briefly how big Ren’s cock was, if he fucked like an animal. The fantasy of Kylo Ren pumping his hips into him made Hux groan. It had been quite a while since he had a good fuck.

He didn’t dare to touch himself though. With Kylo Ren in the next room it didn’t feel right. With a sigh he reminded himself of how he felt about Ren, how Ren had broken his heart. It hurt but at least it made his erection wilt somewhat. He fisted the sheets in an attempt to keep himself from even thinking about touching himself. It felt like forever until he finally drifted off to sleep despite his exhaustion.

The next morning had Hux slap his alarm clock furiously to make it stop blaring at him. He almost knocked it off the bedside table as he cracked his eyes open. Momentarily Hux thought Ben Solo coming back into his life had been some sort of dream or delusion. What a weird nightmare that was. But then he realized it was actually real. And Kylo Ren was probably still somewhere in his flat. Hux groaned as he let himself flop back onto the bed. It was already afternoon because Hux had worked at night and he still had to get some of his clothes to the laundromat since he was soon running out of fresh shirts. The thought of dealing with Kylo Ren made him feel annoyed first thing after waking up.

It couldn’t be helped so Hux climbed out of bed. The room was cold so he snatched up a cardigan. He could bear the cold for now but eventually he’d have to heat up the flat. Winter was coming more quickly than he anticipated and keeping the heating costs down was crucial. Sometimes in Winter Hux took on a third job just so he was out of the cold for most hours of the day.

Hux took a step out of his bedroom but he couldn’t hear Kylo Ren moving around. Maybe the man was still asleep? Hux scoffed at the thought as he carelessly moved into the living room which was deserted.

“Oh.”

Hux felt lost for a moment.

There was something on the living room table and Hux went to pick it up. It was a note and some money.

“Sorry for leaving so suddenly and thank you for letting me stay,” it read. Hux counted out 30 dollars. His jaw clenched involuntarily. He angrily slapped the note and money down onto the table. Kylo Ren had left him again, just like he had left all those years ago – without a real explanation. Ren had played on his old feelings for him and gotten what he wanted.

“Asshole!” Hux shouted, not caring who might hear him through the thin walls. Suddenly his stomach was growling. Hux snatched the money up angrily. At the very least Kylo Ren was good for a meal.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux's life goes on but Kylo Ren's mess still affects him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please check an additional warning for this chapter in the end notes.

Despite the reminder of his past Hux managed to go about his day as if nothing happened. Or at least he tried to. Kylo’s words were still floating in his head. Maybe it was true and Kylo missed him but apparently not badly enough to hit him up again until now. Being in trouble was obviously a good motivation to make a mess of his life but nothing else. Not when things were good. Hux had tried in the past to look Ben Solo up every now and again but to no avail. This one wasn’t on him. This was on Ben aka Kylo.

Fucking werewolf Kylo Ren had really disrupted his life but Hux knew he had to get back on his game. Life waited for no man. He had learned that the hard way.

He could probably pay the electricity bill this week if he wiggled his ass some more down at the club where he worked as a bartender for some nights even though most regulars liked it better when he was mean just like at the diner. Also with the bar between him and the patrons it was a bit hard to show off his ass. The lights were also low.

Just like they were today. At the start of Hux’s shift there was already a tight crowd and multiple people were shouting their orders. His coworker Gabrielle was currently making a cocktail while Hux was quickly counting out some change for a cute guy who bought a beer. He got a wink from the stranger who shoved some single dollar bills at him and a scribbled phone number on a napkin. It was the first of the evening, Hux only fake-chuckled and pulled both over the counter. He’d dispose of the number when the guy wasn’t looking, for now he put the tip into their tip jar.

Work was good tonight, also he and Gabrielle were a great team. She didn’t pry about his private life and he didn’t either. The only things Hux knew about her were that she had a motorcycle and was married to a kindergarten teacher who sometimes came to the bar to pick her up. Hux had to admit they were a cute couple. Gabrielle never talked about her wife but sometimes Hux caught bits and pieces of conversations. They always sounded so in love which was close to enviable. In his weaker moments Hux wished he had a relationship like this with someone. And then he remembered his life wasn’t worse for currently having no man in it.

He had to fix up a Cosmopolitan for a small guy who gave him the stink eye because Hux dared to ask him for an ID even though he had already shown it to get into the bar. Still, he had to see for himself. Hux didn’t entirely trust their bouncers sometimes. There were always one or two who didn’t seem to take their job too seriously when it came to cute twinks with fake ideas that were at least somewhat convincing.

Next to him Gabrielle fumbled with her make-up case and a tiny mirror and when she turned to him he could see her lips glowed blue in the fluorescent light. It looked amazing in contrast with her flawless dark skin.

Hux chuckled and shook his head before shoving his finished cocktail towards the patron. No tip this time. Whatever. The night was still young and at one point Gabrielle pulled him aside to brush some blush on his face. Hux didn’t know why he let her but afterwards the tips were better and Hux got several more phone numbers shoved at him. He made a show of accepting them but ultimately they all landed in their little trash can under the bar top.

“You’re not going to call one of those cute guys?” Gabrielle said with a sly grin at some point when she saw Hux slip another piece of paper into the can. Hux scoffed as he grabbed a new bottle of vodka.

“Please,” he said. “I might be desperate but not THAT desperate.”

“Mhm,” was all she said to him before turning back to the crowd at the bar. Hux didn’t even remember how many damn Mojitos he made tonight. Too many. They were almost out of mint leaves but thankfully Hux’s shift was almost over. Let the next person deal with that, he thought.

The sparse makeup on his cheeks was surely smeared all over by now since he had adopted a habit of brushing sweat from his face with the back of his hand every now and again. Handling heavy bottles for several hours wasn’t terribly exhausting but it did make him sweat.

“Hey baby,” a patron close to him said as he leaned over the counter making googly eyes at Hux. He had to shout it because it was so noisy which made the words partly lose the flirty edge. Not that Hux particularly cared.

Hux gave him a curt nod.

“What would you like?” he said over the din of the music.

“Sex on the beach,” the guy said with a grin. “But also a cocktail by that name.”

Hux had to fight the urge to roll his eyes, instead he forced a smile and said, “You can have a cocktail,” and grabbed an appropriate glass as he started mixing it. The guy kept staring at him with half-lidded eyes. While this wasn’t uncommon Hux wasn’t exactly a fan of it. He tried ignoring the guy the best he could but he kept talking and Hux pretended like he couldn’t hear the weird compliments about his hair and his ass over the din of the music.

When he finally shoved the cocktail across the bar and reached for the money, the guy had the nerve to grab Hux’s arm and pull him closer. Before he could even say anything Gabrielle was already there to pinch the patron’s hand hard enough to make him flinch back in pain.

“We don’t do that here, now fuck off before I call security,” she said. The guy muttered something Hux couldn’t make out, snatched his drink and off he went. Hux’s heart was pounding fast, knocking hard against his ribs. Not only had he not seen that one coming, he also failed to react fast enough.

“Hey, you okay?” Gabrielle said, looking him up and down for a moment.

“Yeah, I guess…. Thank you,” Hux muttered and rubbed his arm. Although he found the guy had already disappeared from the crowd at the bar he still felt a bit uneasy. Hux knew that some men were a little more forceful in their flirting but usually they didn’t try and do it this brazenly while he was working at the bar.

“You know if you want to leave early,” Gabrielle said close to his ear as she was leaning in. “I won’t tell Earl. He doesn’t have to know and he’s not coming down to check anytime soon either.”

Hux scoffed.

“I can’t do that,” he said. While it was a kind offer Hux knew he needed the tips he might miss if he went home early. Besides, Gabrielle was a good coworker who took no shit from anyone and who had his back. She was one of the few people he trusted and he couldn’t leave her hanging. Not after this, not when the bar was this packed. No, he had to suck it up and stay.

Later that night when Hux was on his way home he had his pockets full of tips and the worry of being able to pay one of his most pressing bills had gone away. At least he didn’t have to spend his nights lighting his apartment with candles like he did some months ago when they shut off his electricity. That had been a huge blow to his finances, especially since getting it turned back on costs extra. He could even buy himself some vegetables to pep up the boring noodles he usually ate since they were cheap, as well as cup soups. Hux’s electric kettle really was his best friend when it came to preparing meals since he only really had one pot and one small pan to use with his hot plate and usually he wasn’t able to buy any ingredients that required excessive cooking. Except maybe when he wanted to treat himself and bought a couple of eggs for breakfast and even those really only needed a pan or a pot depending on how he made them.

Hux could almost forget meeting Kylo Ren the other day over the thought of the good, hot meal he would make himself when he got home. He’d make the spicy ramen tonight with some fresh chives he bought earlier today. Maybe he’ll crack an egg into that too, he still had three of them.

Luckily for Hux the club was much closer to his apartment but it was still rather cold outside and even though there were still people in the streets Hux couldn’t shake the feeling of being followed. It was like an instinct he had acquired back in his childhood when his father’s hand was still heavy and an ever-present danger in the back of his mind. He tried at first to only subtly look over his shoulder but he became bolder a moment later.

With great annoyance he thought this might have something to do with Kylo suddenly turning up in his life. Or even worse, the guy at the bar who had grabbed him. He wouldn’t be surprised. It wasn’t the first time some guy waited for him outside but usually even the mention of his pepper spray was enough to deter them. Well, that and a good old kick in the nuts when they thought he was leaning in for a little kiss if a threat didn’t do the trick.

Being unable to shake off the feeling Hux kept one hand in his pocket where his pepper spray was while the other fumbled with the knife in his sleeve. He was aware that both these items could also be a risk for himself, but Hux didn’t care. It was either this or being completely defenseless and he knew better than to ignore his own instincts. They had kept him out of trouble time and time enough. Hell, he liked to believe they were the reason he survived the first few years after his mother had died and Brendol had too much of a focus on all the things he allegedly did wrong in his life at only 6 years old.

Hux was halfway to his apartment when he noticed that there were no more people in the streets. This wasn’t unusual this time of the night but it made his uneasy feeling skyrocket. His heart was beating fast in his chest as he caught himself looking over his shoulder even more often than before, he even strained his ears in case he might hear someone move behind him. It was weird and Hux believed he was finally losing it, that he was becoming completely paranoid. He should’ve left the city a long time ago even though he couldn’t afford it.

But then he heard them. Hux only threw a glimpse over his shoulder but still saw the three huge men walking behind him. It was as if they had appeared out of nowhere. Hux felt as if his stomach had turned into a stone. Of course there was a chance he might be wrong and they were just random people but the moment they realized Hux had seen them they suddenly walked faster.

With his heart pounding up to his throat Hux decided that staying alive was better than not looking like a complete lunatic so he ran. Neither his knife nor his pepper spray were good against three people at once. But he wasn’t the only one who ran because the guys behind him also started running. Maybe it was his imagination but it felt like someone tried to grab at him but couldn’t quite reach him as the wind of their movement fell on his neck. Even though he had only seen them for a second or two Hux knew these guys were much larger and taller than him. They’d get him eventually but he couldn’t help to at least try and get away. Maybe he could shake them in an alley.

And then something or someone growled behind him and then he heard someone fall heavily to the pavement. Hux didn’t stop to look, at least not until his lungs were burning and he had a feeling they weren’t following him anymore. He threw himself around a corner into an alley where he came to halt. Hux could barely catch his breath as he looked for his pursuers who were currently busy with a newcomer.

A cold shower ran down Hux’s back as he realized that none of the men were completely human. Their faces were distorted, beastly even and hairy. All of them were werewolves, just like Kylo.

Kylo.

Hux strained his eyes instead of doing the sensible thing and run away. The werewolf who was fighting all three looked vaguely familiar. He slapped a hand in front of his mouth as he realized that it was Kylo. Hux had no idea how he knew but he knew it despite only seeing Kylo’s wolf face once in the dark. Remarkably enough Kylo Ren could hold his own against three other werewolves. They were swiping at him left and right and although more times than not they hit him, Kylo didn’t waver. He gave as good as he got and more.

The fight only stopped when the wail of a police siren approached dangerously close to the group of werewolves fighting in the street. They sprang apart, each of them gone in the blink of an eye except Kylo Ren who joined Hux in his shadowed alley. The police car thankfully didn’t stop as Hux anxiously watched it drive by. Kylo Ren was breathing hard next to him, no longer showing any of his wolfish features but no less wounded as he propped himself up against the wall. Questions about where he had been were pushed to the back Hux’s mind in favor of dealing with the situation at hand.

“What the hell,” Hux whispered, his heart was still racing. Kylo was slumped next to him against the wall by t hen, his breath audible where he leaned. Hux swallowed his fear as he looked at him.

“Come on,” he said and took Kylo’s arm to lead him away from the alley with the hope the werewolves wouldn’t come back. In the dark of the night it was hard for Hux to see how hurt Kylo really was but he could tell his clothes were torn up badly, he could feel it where he was touching him.

“Sorry,” Kylo whispered but Hux shushed him. They weren’t so far away from his apartment and Hux knew he had at least a first aid kit at home. Anything worse than scratches and he didn’t know what to do. The next hospital was far enough away for them to need a taxi to get there and Hux would hate the idea of the driver calling the police and even worse, tackling something as expensive as a hospital bill.

He had Kylo’s arm around his shoulder as he held onto his waist, guiding him along the street.

“It’s not far now,” he said to Kylo who only grunted in answer.

Hux tried not to think too much about how wetness seeped over his arm. His heart was already in his throat, thinking too much about Kylo’s wounds didn’t make it any better.

Miraculously they didn’t encounter anyone on their way to Hux’s flat. He had to help Kylo into the elevator where the bright light gave Hux a better but still incomplete impression of how bad Kylo’s wounds were. The man was breathing hard and his eyelids were drooping. Hux jostled him intentionally to keep him awake. At least the situation at hand distracted him from standing as close to Kylo as he did. While Kylo’s blood was definitely seeping he was at least not leaving blood all over the floor of the elevator. Not yet anyway. It was only when they stepped out on Hux’s floor that Kylo’s shoes left dark footprints on the ground. Hux couldn’t care about the blood, at least not for now as he dragged Kylo to his door and fumbled open the lock. He hadn’t even noticed until that very moment how badly his hands were shaking. Kylo tried to keep himself on his feet the best he could but he was still stumbling while Hux led him into the flat.

Hux deposited Kylo on the couch where he flopped down heavily before he went to get the first aid kit from the bathroom. It felt more like he fled the living room as he went. In the bathroom he caught a short glimpse of his own face. The last time Hux had seen himself this pale had been many, many years ago. A smidgen of blood stuck to his cheek and Hux found himself furiously wiping at it with the back of his hand before even thinking about cleaning himself up properly. He proceeded to soap up his hands and wash them before he grabbed the first aid kit from under the sink. Thankfully he never had to use anything but the band-aids. The kit was the only thing Hux had to patch up the werewolf in his living room, he hoped it would be enough.

His legs felt wobbly as Hux stepped out of the bathroom. He hadn’t taken the time earlier to switch on the light so when he did Kylo groaned quietly and rubbed a hand over his face.

“Can you pull your own clothes off or do I have to cut them off?” Hux said. They were in tatters anyway but the thought of having to help Kylo out of them and get blood all over himself wasn’t very appealing. He had to touch the wounds eventually but he didn’t want to think about it for as long as he could.

“I can do it,” Kylo muttered followed by a cough as he struggled to get out of his shirt. Hux let him be for a moment as he inspected the contents of the kit which he had put down next to Kylo on the couch. Hux looked over to him, hoping he could get it but Kylo’s arm got trapped in one of his sleeves. Hux huffed quietly.

“Come on, let me try it,” he said and reached over to guide Kylo’s arm carefully out of the torn sleeve. It looked bad. Both the arm and the shirt.

“It’s going to be okay,” Kylo said quietly although his face was pained when Hux looked at him. He struggled out of the rest of his shirt all by himself as Hux turned back to his first aid kit to take out some disinfecting wipes. He tore one open and turned back to Kylo who sat quietly without a shirt on. His huge chest heaved with every breath he took, his upper body was scored with deep gashes here and there. Hux hissed at the sight of them. They looked like they needed stitches. This wasn’t something Hux could do. Instead he did what he could which wasn’t much.

“Fuck…,” he said under his breath as he pressed the wipe to Kylo’s chest which shuddered slightly under the touch. As far as Hux knew the wipes didn’t sting but the wounds had to hurt with how bad they looked. The blood was already crusting up but being wiped with Hux’s trembling hand had some of them break and seep. With the blood wiped mostly away Hux could see that some of the wounds were bite marks. He winced slightly, trying to push the thought away what it might have been like if those werewolves had caught him instead. They would’ve ripped him apart like a piece of paper. Hux didn’t understand how Kylo could stay as calm as he was. And he was lucky as well since his guts weren’t spilling out of his abdomen. All the deeper gashes were higher up, scoring his perfect chest.

As Hux picked up Kylo’s arm to clean it with a new wipe he couldn’t help but glance over to his chest again. Kylo looked very strong, a far cry from the teen Hux had known so many years ago. He had always been tall but not this muscular. Hux had to mentally scold himself for thinking about how hot Kylo had become over the years. This was neither the time nor the place. He scowled more about himself than Kylo’s wounds as he wen ton cleaning them. He had moved on to the other arm which was also littered with bite marks and slash wounds. There were older scars here and there, as if Kylo had previously gone through a similar experience. When the wounds were cleaned enough he pulled out the gauze, hoping it would at least cover up the deepest wounds.

Kylo sharply drew in a breath of air as he saw it and lifted one hand as if to stop Hux.

“I’m healing really fast, I don’t know if that’s really necessary,” he said with a nervous chuckle. So far he hadn’t objected to Hux’s touch but suddenly he did.

Hux took hold of Kylo’s hand and put it down carefully before moving closely into his space with the gauze. Putting it on the deep chest wounds might be a good idea, he thought to himself. It was the only thing he could do.

“Shut the fuck up,” Hux muttered under his breath. Kylo obediently leaned forward so Hux could wrap him up properly even though he made a face while doing so. It couldn’t really be avoided. Unfortunately this put Hux awfully close to Kylo Ren’s perfectly huge pectorals and gave him a good look of his delicious abs. He still smelled like blood but also like salt and sweat and something else. Hux held his breath. Caring for a wounded man would be the most inappropriate time for a boner.

“I don’t want blood all over my flat, that’s all,” Hux muttered, knowing well enough how defensive he sounded. It didn’t matter though. It didn’t mean anything. Anyone would find Kylo Ren’s perfect physique attractive, minus the wounds.

Once he was done, Hux did his best not to look like he was fleeing as he retreated from Kylo’s immediate space to look at his arms. The bite wounds were especially bad but they were already starting to close up. Kylo was right, he was healing fast. There wasn’t much of the gauze left so he only wrapped it around the really bad wounds.

“I’m sorry, this is my fault,” Kylo said and pulled his arm away from Hux’s hands after he was done wrapping it up. “They only went after you because of me …”

Hux huffed. He put the things back where they belonged and shut the first aid kit.

“Damn right this is your fault,” Hux said. “What were you thinking coming here and taking your garbage problems with you? What did they even want from me, hm?”

He stood and crossed his arms. Hux was aware he wasn’t threatening in the slightest to someone like Kylo Ren but the man looked cowed enough. Looking down at his torn hands Kylo took a deep breath.

“Fine. I’ll tell you everything,” he said. Hux tapped his foot impatiently until Kylo finally started talking.

“When I was about 20 I met his extremely powerful werewolf, Snoke. He promised to teach me how to use my powers better than anyone else. He said I had … potential.” Kylo sniffed, a frown appeared on his face. “And I was stupid enough to believe him.”

Sensing this was going to take longer than he thought, Hux moved the first aid kit out of the way to sit down next to Ren but not close enough for them to touch.

“He did teach me. He taught me how to do half-transformations like I showed you at the diner, how to transform outside of the full moon. I even learned how to turn into an actual wolf.”

Kylo sounded excited for a moment but his face grew dark almost immediately.

“But his price was that I had to leave my family. The time I spent with him I felt more like a monster than a man.”

“What do you mean?” Hux said without thinking. He scolded himself internally for saying anything at all. He should’ve just listened instead of commenting on any of this.

“You see,” Kylo said with a sigh. “He’s not just the alpha of a huge werewolf pack, he’s keeping an entire part of his city under his thumb. But he’s clever enough to not have anything link back to him. He used us for that and other things.”

“So he’s a criminal is what you’re saying. And you’re a criminal too for helping that man,” Hux said and shook his head. He should throw Kylo out on the street. Harboring a criminal didn’t sound like a good idea, having a werewolf in his home even less so.

But why didn’t he throw Kylo Ren out? Hux couldn’t say what exactly stopped him. Maybe it was his stupid nostalgia about a boy he once loved.

“I know. I’ve done a lot of bad shit for him and so did the others.” Kylo turned towards him and shook his head. He looked desperate.

“It’s bad, Hux. It’s fucking bad. So many people got hurt. Hell, some even lost their lives because of Snoke.”

“And you still stayed with them,” Hux muttered. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. But it was as if Ren wasn’t even listening because he simply went on talking.

“I thought I could take him, you know. Because I know I’m stronger than him, much, much stronger. So I challenged him for his position. But I should’ve known better,” Kylo said. “Instead of fighting fair he set the others on me and I had to run. Not my finest moment.”

“You’re turning up in my life after 14 years of not showing your face even once and the only thing you do is bring your trouble to my doorstep? Are you serious?” Hux said. He was so angry he couldn’t stay were he sat next to Ren and instead shot to his feet.

“I can’t believe you,” he said, throwing his arms in the air. “You’re such an egoistic, stupid asshole!”

Hux couldn’t help but pace, he didn’t even care his neighbors might hear him through the walls as he rounded up on Kylo.

“This is just like fucking high school all over again. Instead of telling me the truth you made me think that maybe you were just some sad straight boy who got confused. Back then I thought you were just trying to get away from me.”

Kylo chuckled bitterly where he sat on the couch.

“Oh no, I’m a cock sucker, don’t worry. I suck dicks and fuck asses and-” he said. He was about to say something else when Hux shushed him. His only saving grace was that Kylo had been into him back then. It was a dumb thing to even mention but it had been on Hux’s mind and it had come up again thanks to Kylo Ren’s sudden reappearance in his life.

Hux sighed. Kylo brought this mess to him and now it was his mess too.

“So what now? I’m guessing talking to these people isn’t going to cut it?”

Kylo slumped back against the couch before he answered.

“I think it’s best if I stay near you the next couple of days,” he said thoughtfully. “To protect you.”

“Sure,” Hux muttered. “Because you’re currently in top shape.”

“Hey, I said I heal fast.”

“Whatever, I’m going to wipe up your blood in the hallway. Don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone,” Hux said. He left Kylo to stew on the couch while he went to grab some cleaning supplies from his bathroom. Hux took an old towel since it was the only thing he had on hand and wet it before emerging only to see Kylo trying to stand. His legs were shaking as was the hand he used to try and boost himself up from the couch.

“I told you to stay there,” Hux said with an annoyed scoff. He only had a wet towel to work with and he really didn’t need Kylo to open his wounds and create an even messier situation by spreading more of his blood everywhere.

“Fine. But let me go with you to tomorrow. You don’t know what those guys look like,” Kylo said and Hux had to admit he was right. He hated it but it was true.

“Alright. You do that,” Hux muttered. The nerve of that man...

Kylo slumped back on the couch, his eyes almost sliding shut. His attempt to stand had clearly depleted the last of his strength.

“We should just … run away together,” he muttered on the verge of passing out. Hux put his wet towel down for a moment to throw the sheets over Kylo so he was at least somewhat covered. Seeing him like this Hux couldn’t help but remember Ben Solo, the cute boy he dated in high school. A fleeting memory of his soft lips taunted Hux. He caught himself reaching out for a second as if to touch them. Hux stopped himself from moving closer, instead he went to retrieve his wet towel and set about cleaning the hallways, or at least smudging the blood on the floor enough so it wouldn’t lead towards his flat and be instead an unrecognizable mess. The floor was dirty anyway, some more smudges wouldn’t make much of a difference.

When Hux closed the door of his flat behind him he took a slow, measured breath. The situation he was in felt absolutely insane. Still, he turned on the lights in the hallway and bent down to attack the first stain. Thankfully he didn’t have to deal with too many of these. Hux didn’t even give a shit about the elevator. While dealing with the stains he thought about Kylo’s words before he passed out on the couch. Running away sounded like a ludicrous idea. Hux hoped the situation would simply blow over. His stomach growled as he was smudging the last of the stains.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for some gore in this chapter but no explicit descriptions.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Life goes on and the werewolf threat continues. Kylo Ren proves himself a very annoying bodyguard.

If Hux had hoped to fall asleep immediately after the dinner then he thought wrong. He wanted to blame it on the noodles but they weren’t the thing that sat like a stone in his stomach. Instead he couldn’t stop thinking about Kylo Ren. Not even an attempt to close his eyes and think of nothing helped, he still ended up staring at the ceiling wondering about things. Even if he tried to direct his thoughts into a more peaceful direction they still easily drifted back to the man on his couch. Pressing his face into the pillow Hux wondered how someone as surprisingly sweet as Ben Solo could turn out like this. Sure, Ben had always been a bit of an asshole just like Hux himself but between them there had been nothing but good things. Was the promise of power really this alluring? And from a stranger no less?

Despite his best attempts sleep wouldn’t come so Hux did the only sensible thing: He got back up. While it wasn’t particularly difficult to walk quietly with only socks on Hux was still careful as he stepped into the living room. It felt strange sneaking around in his own home but he thought it necessary as to not startle Kylo Ren. Waking him up suddenly might be dangerous, Hux thought to himself. While had previously not considered it, having a werewolf in his home might not be the best of life’s choices.

A part of him wanted to take another look at the man’s sleeping face to see if there was still anything that might remind him of Ben Solo, the boy he once knew and loved. Instead he found Ren blinking up at him the moment Hux came to stand close to the couch.

“You’re not sleeping,” Hux said and immediately felt like an idiot for stating the obvious.

“You’re not sleeping either,” Kylo said after a beat of silence. His large form hardly fit on the couch, in fact he had his feet propped up since they would otherwise dangle off the end and remain uncovered by the blanket. Hux almost felt bad about it. But only almost.

“Move,” he said and nodded to Kylo’s feet which slid to the floor a moment later as he sat up properly. Hux sat down but didn’t say anything at first. It was a bit unnerving to feel Ren’s gaze on him and the heat of his body even though they weren’t touching. A shaky exhale escaped Hux as he steeled himself.

“Why me, Kylo? Why come here when you know you’re trouble? Why didn’t you go back to your parents? Aren’t they werewolves too?” Hux said. He couldn’t imagine Kylo thought even for a moment that he would be more save with him than with his family. But instead of an easy answer Kylo’s first reaction was a long, deep sigh. This couldn’t be good.

“I came to you because you’re the only good thing left in my life,” Kylo said, his gaze no longer on Hux but somewhere on the dark floor. His voice sounded close to broken and very quiet.

“But your parents--”

“I can’t go back after leaving the way I did,” Kylo said hastily. “Running away, joining another pack. It’s not what we do. I can’t go back there. No. You were the only person I could think of while I was lying bleeding in a ditch when I was on the run from Snoke’s underlings.”

He could hear Kylo swallow thickly before he went on.

“You’re the only person I know who never had anything to do with Snoke. Well, until now anyway… And it’s my fault.”

Hux wanted to point out how Kylo’s parents loved him anyway. They had always been like this, at least in Hux’s memory they were perfectly loving and accepting. They didn’t bat an eye when young Ben Solo had introduced him to them. They even left the two of them alone in Ben’s room even when they weren’t home.

Meanwhile, Hux had to hide his own homosexuality from his father until Brendol had passed away a few years ago. Around Ben’s parents they could both be themselves and it was something Hux had treasured immensely all those years ago.

“What happened to you though?” Kylo said after a moment. “Why are you living like this? I thought your parents had money.”

A quick anger boiled inside Hux’s skull but he reined it in quickly like he always did. Instead he settled for giving Kylo a scathing look. With his great werewolf eyes he was most probably able to see it better than Hux could see Kylo’s face in the darkness.

“Well, excuse me that I wasn’t as lucky as you to have a family that supported me. And you went and squandered it away and for what? Some werewolf powers? So you can run around as an oversized dog?” Hux said. He couldn’t hold back any longer when Kylo was so in-his-face about his miserable life. Sure, Hux screwed up but from what Kylo told him he screwed up even more. Worse than that, he joined some sort of werewolf mafia.

Kylo growled at him low in his throat which made Hux jump to his feet.

“Don’t you dare growl at me! You know I’m right, you asshole!” Hux shouted into his face but Kylo didn’t react apart from becoming quiet again. Hux didn’t even want to hear another word, he didn’t wait for Kylo to say anything as he stomped off back to his bedroom. He closed the door behind himself noisily and uncaring if his neighbors might hear it. This was the most amount of anger Hux allowed himself to feel at this point. He climbed back into his bed and angrily threw his blanket over himself. Hux knew about the proverb of not going to bed angry but he still did, annoyed with that stupid asshole Kylo Ren who still occupied his living room. Back in high school Hux had always admired how accepting Kylo’s parents had been. He couldn’t think of any reason they wouldn’t take their own son back, even after running off with a wild crowd, even after becoming a criminal. It bothered Hux so much he wanted to kick off the blanket and stomp back out into the living room and tear Kylo a new one. Instead he told himself it was none of his business. The thing that was his business now thanks to Kylo were the werewolves who were after him for some reason. Probably revenge. Probably just as a means to an end.

The next day Hux wandered into the direction of his kitchen after taking a good, long shower. He thought maybe he’d be alone again but there was Kylo Ren, sitting on his couch, leaving through one of his books from the library. Hux decided to ignore him, didn’t even tell him good morning as he walked past him but Kylo didn’t seem to mind. Hux caught him peeking over the book to catch at least a glimpse of him. Since the kitchen and the living room were basically the same small room, Hux had no other choice than to endure Kylo’s company as he rummaged through his small fridge for his best options. He still had some eggs as well as some slightly stale toast. Despite it already being later in the day Hux wanted to treat the time he woke up as breakfast time although it was more closely to lunch time.

Hux popped the toast into the toaster and then took out a pan from his small cupboard that held most of his dishes. There was still a bit of butter left in the fridge so he popped that right into the pan before turning it on. He could hear Kylo Ren shuffle around behind him as he busied himself in the kitchen. There was no thought in Hux’s mind on offering Kylo any food. If he wanted to eat he was more than welcome to go out and get himself something, Hux didn’t have the funds to feed himself and a guest. He didn’t say any of that though as he cracked the eggs into the hot pan.

There was silence between them and Hux doesn’t mind any of it. The past few years of his life he had spent alone anyway. At the same time the tiniest of thought wriggled itself into Hux’s brain on how it wasn’t so bad to have someone in his home to keep him company. Even if he couldn’t understand Kylo’s reason for coming here in the first place. Nostalgia was all good and well but he should’ve known about the consequences of his actions. He was an adult, he should’ve been aware.

Before he could start fuming about it again Hux pushed the thought away. He had to get ready for work.

When Hux pulled on his jacket Kylo finally shut the book and got off the couch. He stretched noisily and when Hux glanced at him he saw how Kylo’s shirt was riding up, giving him a glance of the toned abdomen. Hux swallowed thickly at the sight and turned back to the door. Kylo Ren getting up sure was a good sign of him feeling better but then he was suddenly at Hux’s side.

“You’re going out?” he said.

“Work,” Hux muttered. He had an afternoon shift at the diner, followed by a night shift at the bar. It was exhausting but Hux thought he was lucky to get the hours at all and so close together too. Without the work he didn’t know where he would end up. Probably somewhere that wasn’t good. Or at least worse than the place he was already in. He saw Ren slip on his shoes and pick up his jacket where he dropped it somewhere last night. Hux shot him a puzzled look.

“What? I’m going to keep you safe?” he said. “You said I could.”

Hux scoffed. Until this moment he had completely forgotten about last night’s conversation where he had agreed for Ren to let him follow along. It felt strange to have some sort of bodyguard at his side. The past years he had done very well without one. Until now anyway.

“Just… behave,” Hux said as he adjusted his own jacket. Ren shot him a grin. One wouldn’t know how badly he had been hurt the previous night by the sight of him now. He didn’t even wince as he moved. Hux told himself not to think about it overly much.

The way to the diner was blessedly quiet even though Hux couldn’t help but look over his own shoulder way too often. Even with Kylo Ren, an actual werewolf at his side, he didn’t feel very safe. So when Hux finally stood behind the counter with his apron on he felt a lot better. Or to say the least he didn’t have the urge to look over his shoulder every five seconds.

The one thing he wasn’t so keen on was having Kylo Ren sit at the counter, newspaper in hand, coffee in front of him. Earlier he had ordered a sandwich and when Hux went to pick it up his boss leaned out of the kitchen.

“Hey buddy, you’re looking more down than usual. You okay?” he said. Good, nice Poe Dameron. Some years ago Hux had a huge crush on him but it hadn’t been in the stars. Now his concern wasn’t endearing to Hux anymore, it was outright dangerous with the wolves nipping at his heels. No, dragging Poe into this as well was a very bad idea.

“Just a bad night. The bar was packed full, some guy even grabbed me but nothing seriously happened,” Hux said and picked up some of the finished food before Poe could voice more concerns. He ignored the thoughtful look in Poe’s face as he turned and left. It wasn’t unusual for him to look somewhat down. But this time the circumstances weren’t as bad as someone giving him a hard time at his other job.

Thankfully after putting down Ren’s sandwich Hux had to leave for a table further away so the nod Ren gave him over the newspaper didn’t have to be met with any sort of acknowledgment from him. It would be alright, Hux told himself. Just the usual shift at the diner with the usual people, the usual food being ordered, nothing out of the ordinary. Only he had Kylo Ren sit at the counter as a silent but deadly presence to anything that could potentially harm him. Nothing to worry about here, Hux told himself but in the back of his head he certainly knew things weren’t improving even with Kylo Ren there. Even worse, it felt outright hilarious to call anything about this situation ‘ordinary’.

As much as Hux tried to avoid looking at Ren there was still the matter of refilling his mug every now and then. It would look bad if he didn’t so he tried not to dwell on it and just get it over with. To Hux’s surprise Kylo didn’t look up this time. He didn’t even acknowledge him. Hux only realized how tense he really was when something in his own body suddenly became relaxed. It was as if he finally let go after holding his breath for too long. He could do this, he told himself. And maybe the werewolves would give up eventually. For a moment Hux could leave himself with the hope it would turn out just like that.

At least until he saw a regular enter the diner. Not that it was anything out of the ordinary but the man – Jimmy? Or Billy? - Hux could never really remember despite hearing the name often enough, well, he tended to flirt with Hux and usually Hux let him since it earned him a huge tip. On day were nothing was quite alright he sure didn’t feel up to it but he still tried to go along with it.

“Hey sweetheart,” the man said as he sat down at the counter, incidentally next to Kylo Ren. Hux offered him a rare smile and received one in return. The man chuckled at him, he even blushed a little bit. Perfect, Hux thought to himself, he was in for a big tip, at least if he could pull off not looking like a tortured soul for a hot second.

“What can I get you?” Hux said while leaning a little bit closer. The regular visibly swallowed as he stared at him. So far this guy had only ever been nice, never creepy, didn’t even ask for his phone number. And yet Hux never had an interest in going out with him because not dating anyone from his workplaces extended to his regulars as well, no matter if they were at the diner or the bar.

Before the man could even tell Hux his order there was a low growl from behind Ren’s newspaper. Hux shot him a look which Kylo couldn’t see and before he could even say anything the regular vacated his seat.

“Uh, I’ll just go sit at one of the tables,” he said and walked off. Hux stared after him for a second before rounding up on Ren who’s newspaper he would’ve loved to rip out of his hands. But as it was he couldn’t cause a scene.

“What the hell? Don’t fucking do that again,” Hux whispered before taking off to get the regular’s order. He couldn’t help but glance over his shoulder as he left only to see Ren staring at his newspaper in hand. He was still somewhere at the beginning. That bastard didn’t even attempt to look as if he was reading at all!

“Alright, what can I get you?” Hux said with a pleasant smile for the second time as he got to the regular’s table.

He left with an order for breakfast items despite it being the afternoon. They didn’t discriminate at the diner though. For most people any time was pancake time either way. Hux couldn’t help but try and fry Ren with his gaze through the newspaper which he most definitely still hadn’t been reading. Or else he would’ve changed the page already. If only he could throw Kylo out but Hux couldn’t think of a valid reason and on top of this conundrum he also didn’t want to get mauled by werewolves. Hux tried to ignore Ren for now to focus on work even if it felt impossible.

Hux was about to think things would be uneventful until about one hour into his shift when he noticed Kylo Ren tense up at the counter. He wasn’t faking reading the newspaper anymore but instead staring at a guest who had only just entered the diner: an extremely tall, platinum-blonde woman. As if on command the skin at the back of Hux’s neck prickled and everything inside of him told him to run. Instead he tried not to stare at her while keeping track of her from the corner of his eye as he refilled some cups at the counter. He was close enough for Ren to say something if he chose to but then Ren hastily pulled out some cash which he left next to his cup before getting up. Without a word he left Hux behind to follow the blonde woman outside. Hux could only stare after them. His heart was pounding so fast he feared it might jump out of his chest and yet he was frozen where he stood for what felt like an eternity. But then he put the pot down and made his way to the kitchen door.

“Hey Poe, I need to take 5,” he said, hoping Poe wouldn’t mind and wouldn’t be able to see how badly shaken up he really was. Unfortunately Poe saw through him with just one glance but tending to the stove at least prevented him from coming over.

“You’re white as a sheet, buddy,” he said, a worried look on his face. “Just come back when you can, okay? I bet Carol can take over your section for a bit.”

Carol was an older coworker of Hux who had a gay son who she supported so openly and aggressively that she always wore a vest with at least 30 buttons on them proclaiming how proud she was of her gay child. She was sweet in her own way but also a bit much.

“Thank you,” Hux muttered while he was already heading out of the door and into the staff bathroom. That one had a window to the alley. Usually Hux hated it when the window was open at this time of the year since it was freezing cold and he wasn’t a fan of freezing his ass or balls off but this time he was thankful since he could already hear them talking.

“Did he send you to kill me, Phasma? You know I’m stronger than you” Kylo said, Hux could easily tell he was on edge. The woman, Phasma, only scoffed at him. Her voice was like steel as she answered.

“I’ve come to deliver a message from Snoke. He says you can come back if you grovel a bit and accept some minor punishments,” Phasma said. Ren’s growl was barely audible as were his steps, he was clearly pacing, thinking. Hux strained his ears so he wouldn’t miss a word, he held his breath too although it was hardly necessary.

“What about Hux? What does Snoke want? To get back at me through him?” Kylo eventually said, sending a cold shiver down Hux’s spine at the mention of his name. He pressed himself flat against the wall as he listened. Hearing Phasma’s cold laugh in response startled him.

“You care too much,” she said. “Snoke wants to turn him, add him to the pack as a way to keep you under control. Apparently he wants you back so much he’s willing to look past you fighting your own kind for a human.” There was so much disdain in her voice, it was as if the word ‘human’ was a swear by the way she said it. It was Ren’s turn to scoff.

“You wouldn’t know what it’s like since you only care about yourself,” he said, still angry.

“True,” she said. “Only I never made a secret of it. You in turn tried so hard to be a team player that the others take your betrayal a lot worse.” Then a humorless chuckle escaped her. “Well, see you around. Or maybe not. I don’t actually care but it shouldn’t surprise you that the others do. After all, Snoke gave them a home, a place where they can be themselves. So how bad could a price in blood possibly be?”

She walked off and Kylo didn’t say anything for a while. Hux tried breathing slowly to give his poor heart a break. Ren sighed audibly, but then he gave Hux a bad fright by talking directly to him: “Hux? Can we talk?”

Hux flinched hard enough to gasp, surprised to be found out.

“I’m … just on a bathroom break,” Hux stammered and turned on a faucet to at least pretend as if he was doing normal bathroom things. He turned it off after a few seconds and fled.

His thoughts were racing as he returned to the diner. Him? A werewolf? Hux didn’t want strange supernatural powers if he could help it, not if it meant having to work for a dangerous mafia type of guy. Not if the guy was the one who would bite him. Not that Hux found the thought appealing at all of letting anyone bite him, ever. At least outside of the bedroom.

“Honey, are you alright?” Carol said next to him, startling Hux badly enough to flinch. He had zoned out hard enough to not even notice her.

“Yeah, I’m okay,” Hux muttered but the older woman still gave him a worried look. She was great but not someone Hux could confide in, not when it was about werewolves.

“You know you can always talk to me if you need anything,” she said. Carol gave him another thoughtful look before carrying on with her work. Hux wished he could follow her lead, just go back to what he was doing but every time a costumer he didn’t know entered the diner his heart skipped a beat. Every single one of them was suddenly suspicious to him. The moment Kylo returned to the counter Hux couldn’t help but pay more attention to him. Not because his interest was suddenly raised by the conversation outside but because Kylo was the only one who knew for sure if there was another werewolf nearby or not.

He kept looking over so much that Carol stopped by him more than once to whisper something like, “Oh, him, huh?” but Hux tried ignoring it. This wasn’t about romance, this was about survival. But Carol couldn’t know about that. No one could. It was absolutely crazy to Hux himself to say the least but the reality of things was that a mafia-esque band of werewolves was after him and the only person who could possibly help him was this ragged guy who only so happened to be his ex-boyfriend.

The moment Hux’s break came up he excused himself briefly before storming out. This time he didn’t even have to check if Kylo was coming along since he closely followed on Hux’s heel. It wasn’t until they were in the alley next to the diner that Hux rounded up on Kylo. He was in his face immediately.

“You have to fix this. Now,” he hissed at him.

Kylo gave him a startled look before pushing his hand through his thick hair.

“I don’t know how,” he said, the remorse apparent in his voice. “We could run away together, you and me.”

Hux scoffed immediately. This again. He was about to turn away when Kylo put his hands on his shoulders.

“You’re being ridiculous,” Hux said.

“I’m not. I saved some money away on a secret bank account. We could go far away together, they wouldn’t find us,” Kylo said. His eyes were pleading so beautifully Hux felt his heart tug to say yes. He knew it was a bad idea, he pulled away from Kylo’s hold.

“You could’ve done that without me,” Hux said and walked away, back to work without letting Kylo stop him a second time. He was vaguely aware of Kylo following but for the rest of his shift Hux chose not to interact with him. Not even when Kylo shooed off other men who tried flirting with him. Hux simply ignored him.

Hux’s mood didn’t improve as the night went on during his shift at the bar. He couldn’t help but slam some of the things he worked with down a bit too hard. It didn’t deter anyone from attempting to flirt with him though which caused a very unique problem to occur: Kylo Ren’s attention. Every time a guy even so much as batted his eyelashes at Hux, Kylo was somehow already in his space with a barely audible growl or snarl and a glare that would make most men second-guess if they really wanted to risk an altercation with someone like him. Or in short: It sucked. Hux got less tips because of Kylo’s behavior. Which also meant mean glares from his coworker which Hux could only redirect at Kylo who kept sticking to the bar, nursing the one beer he had ordered. Momentarily he seemed subdued but Hux knew it wouldn’t be for long.

“You want to have him thrown out?” Yolanda, Hux’s coworker, muttered directly into his ear when the opportunity presented itself. Hux suppressed a deep sigh, he couldn’t throw Kylo out. He still needed him.

“Just ignore him,” he answered through gritted teeth and went back to work. Somehow this night felt much longer than any of the others he worked in the past few months. Yolanda gave him a shrug and a frown. Usually Hux didn’t give two shits about how his coworkers felt about him but this time it irked him. He huffed in annoyance even though it wasn’t audible above the music. A glance to the small trash can under the bar top revealed it to be abnormally empty of any phone numbers but Hux couldn’t feel relieved about Kylo’s meddling. Sure, he never planned to go out with anybody who slipped him his number at work but the only reason for tonight being blessedly absent of weird attempts at flirting was another source of annoyance for Hux. He didn’t like any of it since the lack of attempts caused a lack of tips and even worse, it made Kylo seem as if he was the boss of Hux’s love life. It was unacceptable.

And yet at the same time he couldn’t help but feel flattered for Kylo’s continued interest. Hux hated himself for feeling this way.

Later on their way home Hux accepted Kylo’s jacket to keep warm. His thoughts were on the tips he didn’t get that night. It was Kylo’s fault. But it was also because of Kylo Hux didn’t get grabbed or sweet-talked in an overly creepy way but Hux needed the money more than what he lost of his dignity when he let strangers treat him like they did. It wasn’t so bad, he liked to tell himself. Or maybe it was and he simply didn’t care anymore.

“I don’t like you shooing away costumers,” Hux eventually said after they were walking in silence for about ten minutes.

“And the growling,” he went on, “the growling has to stop.”

Kylo’s only response was a quiet grunt when Hux turned his head just enough to catch a glimpse of him. A gust of wind had Hux wrap Kylo’s slightly tattered jacked more tightly around himself. He shivered and somewhere in the back of his mind he wondered if Kylo would attempt to put an arm around him to keep him warm. The thought caused Hux to slightly panic. But Kylo didn’t. Instead he wordlessly continued to walk at Hux’s side.

The night was quiet around them and any other day Hux would have felt threatened by it but with a werewolf at his side it was different. Instead of analyzing every tiny noise around him Hux was focused on the man besides him.

Perhaps, Hux thought to himself, he was lucky because once again he wasn’t walking home all by himself. At least with Kylo around he didn’t have to worry about any werewolves or the usual types of criminals. The type who took all your money and maybe decided not to stick you with their knife after all if you were lucky. Kylo Ren’s presence was silent but reassuring.

Back at Hux’s apartment Kylo didn’t say anything as he sat down at the couch that doubled as his bed where he grabbed a book from the low table. Hux only stood and watched, his hand still trailed over the rips and tears in Kylo’s jacket where Hux had put it up on a hook at the wardrobe. He took a deep breath before he stalked into the bathroom with great determination to pick up the first aid kit. Hux came back to stand in front of Kylo who was still reading quietly.

“Take off your clothes,” Hux demanded with a stern look. “I need to check your wounds.”

Kylo looked up at him as if he wanted to argue but then he put down the book and pulled his shirt over his head. The bandages Hux had put there the night before were still present and looked dry. He probably should’ve changed them hours ago but it couldn’t be helped. He felt the tiniest bit guilty about it. Instead of dwelling on it Hux bent down to carefully lift the bandages away from Kylo’s chest.

“What the fuck…” Hux muttered. Compared to yesterday the wounds were almost completely healed. They looked slightly pink, like fresh skin just from below a crust that went away by itself.

“I told you I heal fast,” Kylo said with a grin as he pulled off the rest of the bandages to reveal the other wounds to be almost gone as well. Hux’s mouth went dry at the sight of Kylo’s naked chest. After everything that happened today, after having Kylo Ren breathing down his neck all night he couldn’t help but move closer with a bizarre feeling of need. Something in his gaze must have given him away because Kylo came to meet him halfway. Before he could kiss him Hux put a hand on Kylo’s chest to hold him at bay momentarily. His own heart was beating fast at the close proximity. With just one word he could stop this, he could keep Kylo from doing anything but instead he bent close to his ear and whispered: “Just don’t kiss me on the mouth.”

Kylo scoffed before licking at his neck, causing Hux to shiver. It had been too long and maybe Hux would regret this later but he needed it. With everything that had been going on lately he needed this to take his mind off of everything else. Even if it was Kylo in front of him. It could’ve been a stranger, instead Hux would take a werewolf into his bed.

“Let’s do this,” Kylo said and pulled Hux into his lap. Hux almost lost his balance for a second before holding onto him. There was a moment where Kylo simply put his arms around Hux and held him close as he breathed in deeply where he had buried his nose in Hux’s neck. It was weird and Hux almost pushed Kylo away while at the same time he wanted to cling to him just to feel close to someone again but the moment was over too fast and Kylo’s hands were busy working Hux’s shirt over his head. A sharp breath escaped Hux as Kylo’s fingers touched the bare skin of his chest where they glanced over his nipples. Compared to Kylo he didn’t look like much. Too skinny and with a flat chest but Kylo didn’t seem to mind as he hotly kissed his skin starting at Hux’s jaw and down over his clavicle. With every new kiss he became more demanding, his kisses lasted longer, his lips sucked at Hux’s skin with more force, causing him to gasp as his own hands were still on Kylo’s big chest where they rested on the huge pectorals.

“Touch me more,” Kylo whispered breathlessly between two kisses, his big, warm hands were on Hux’s waist with one of them soon diving below his waistband at his back to touch his ass. It was overwhelming how much of Kylo was in Hux’s space from one second to the next, it was too much and yet not enough. Hux’s hands moved on their own as he buried one in Kylo’s thick hair while he thumbed at one pert nipple with the other. Hux could feel Kylo’s stiff cock through his pants, pressing tightly against his own clothed erection. He could hardly stand it anymore, he needed more contact, more touch, more naked skin on naked skin.

Before Hux could even say anything Kylo’s hands were both on his ass to lift him up and away as he stood. Somehow Hux managed not to let a startled yelp escape him as he held onto Kylo tightly, his fingers digging into the meat of Kylo’s back as he wrapped his legs around him while he was being carried.

“Let’s go to bed,” Kylo half whispered, half growled into Hux’s neck before kissing it one last time as he carried him to the other room. It was as if he weighed nothing at all to Kylo. It was so terribly arousing Hux couldn’t wait to get out of his pants which felt more and more constricting by the second.

He immediately missed the contact when Kylo dumped him onto the bed but not for long. The man was on top of him in a heartbeat, kissing his neck and chest with his soft lips, sending sparks of arousal down Hux’s body whenever Kylo sucked a new bruise into his skin. Kylo’s hands were quick as they opened his pants and with one sharp, strong tug they were halfway down Hux’s thighs together with his underwear. Hux could only clutch the sheets under him as Kylo touched him everywhere except his cock. It was as if he had more than two hands and more than one mouth with how quick he moved down Hux’s chest to suck on a nipple, causing Hux to arch his back and chase the feeling. It’s been so long Hux was completely unable to hold any sounds in as he writhed in the sheets, his legs busy wiggling completely out of the rest of his clothes. Kylo’s hands were quick to brush over his hip, eliciting a long whine from Hux due to the ongoing neglect of his cock.

Then, suddenly the contact was gone and Hux wanted to complain when he saw Kylo leave the bed briefly to slip off his own pants and underwear. The sight of his erect dick made Hux’s mouth run dry. It was huge. His own cock throbbed and his hole clenched on nothing at the thought of getting that thing inside of him. Kylo’s predatory glance only made him want it more.

“I want to ride you,” Hux said breathlessly and sat up. As much fun as having Kylo on top of him sounded, the thought of riding him was even more appealing. The very idea of sitting on top of this mountain of a man made Hux shiver with lust.

“Yes,” Kylo whispered, his voice husky and his eyes wide in the darkness as he grabbed Hux and switched their positions, jostling their cocks together momentarily, causing both of them to groan. Hux steadied himself by holding onto Kylo’s shoulders as he found his balance in his lap.

“First drawer,” he whispered as he himself started to attack Kylo’s neck by sucking on his skin. Hux wasn’t gentle in the slightest, he felt unable to considering who he was with. Kylo didn’t seem to mind as he shuddered and moaned while reaching for the drawer with one hand while his other supported Hux’s back. Despite being tilted a little to the side Hux couldn’t stop tasting Ren’s hot skin. His ears prickled when he heard Kylo open the bottle of lube, Hux’s body tensed slightly as he anticipated the cool touch of Kylo’s lubed fingers so much he had to consciously try to relax. But then Kylo’s touch was warm as they stroked over his hole. The fingers felt so thick Hux hardly believed they could fit inside of him but Kylo went slow as Hux shuddered above him at the touch. He took a deep breath to focus. Hux was aware he was being silly, he had taken bigger things than Kylo’s fingers in the past, he could take them easily.

“Just put them in,” he whispered breathlessly as Kylo continued to touch him on the outside. He needed to feel more. Instead of asking if he was sure, Kylo pressed one digit in slowly, causing Hux to gasp quietly as his hands tightly held onto Kylo’s back.

“You’re doing so well,” Kylo whispered, he turned his head so he could continue kissing Hux’s neck. The sensation distracted him from the stretch he craved.

“Sh-shut up,” Hux muttered as he tried to enjoy the touch of Kylo’s finger inside of him. With his other hand Kylo stroked the small of Hux’s back soothingly. Eventually he eased the second finger in, causing Hux to hiss as it grazed his prostate, causing heat to collect in his belly momentarily.

“You okay?” Kylo asked and frustratingly enough his fingers stopped moving, causing Hux to move his hips to feel more of them. Taking the hint, Kylo moved them slowly, touching Hux’s prostate every now and again as he slicked up Hux’s insides.

“Just put it in already,” Hux muttered against Kylo’s heated neck. For a second he thought Kylo would ask him if he could take it, if he was sure but instead he grunted and removed his slick fingers from Hux’s ass to fumble with a condom. Hux could barely keep a moan in but he somehow managed. If Kylo had talked, Hux surely would’ve snapped at him, instead they were in the silence of their own audible breaths and tiny noises.

There was a click as Kylo opened the bottle again to slick his own cock up with one hand while his other still helped lifting Hux’s ass to give Hux’s quivering thighs a break. He was shameless with his moans. Hux was close to berating him but then he felt the tip of Kylo’s dick poke against him were he lined himself up. With a deep breath Hux sank down. The head of Kylo’ss cock slipped in easily thanks to all the lube but Hux felt immediately full, still he was determined, he sank down further despite Kylo’s efforts to eas him down much slower. They both groaned when Kylo’s huge cock was halfway in. Hux had to stop, there was more stretch and a bit of burn. He could tell his own cock was already leaking precome although neither him nor Kylo had touched it even once. His hands scrabbled for leverage only for Kylo to put both of his own on his ass to keep him steady. It was almost dizzying being so full of another person again. Hux didn’t even notice how hard he was breathing until Kylo whispered “Relax” directly into his ear, causing him to shiver from the hot breath.

“I’m fine,” Hux muttered. He gathered his wits and started to move, ignoring the burn as this magnificent cock stretched him further. Hux only stopped when he had Kylo’s complete length inside of him. He leaned back slightly to look at Kylo who’s face he could hardly see in the dark of the bedroom. Ren had his eyes closed, there was a shiver in his body as if he tried very hard to hold back. Hux would appreciate it if it weren’t for the fact that he wanted a good, fast fuck.

“Please,” Kylo whispered, his hips were moving ever so slightly, not enough to bounce Hux properly but still enough to cause him to groan quietly from the length and thickness alone. In a brief, dizzying moment Hux fantasized about how he would probably be able to see the outline of Kylo’s cock on his belly if it weren’t so dark in the room. The thought turned him on so much he had to get a hold of himself so he wouldn’t blow his load too quickly.

Hux started moving slowly at first, lifting himself up only in tiny increments before he grew bolder. It was as if Kylo’s cock carved a space out inside of him with every downward stroke and Hux couldn’t get enough of it. On the third of fourth time he managed to move faster Kylo finally managed to strike his prostate, causing Hux to clench up around him, echoing a moan from Kylo. Somehow he managed to stay mostly at the same angle, causing Kylo to finally move against him, bouncing Hux in his lap. Hux closed his eyes in concentration, he could hear the bed creaking under them as he rode Kylo harder than he had ever ridden anyone before. Each strike to his prostate had him crave more, more, more.

And then Kylo stopped him from moving, pressed him downinto his lap and moaned as he buried his face against Hux’s heated neck. Before Hux could ask what he was doing he felt the base of Kylo’s cock swell up inside of him. There was a burn from the stretch but then it pressed hard against his prostate, so hard he couldn’t help but take his own cock in hand and stroke himself as he felt Kylo throb inside of him.

“What is that,” Hux whispered breathlessly at the feeling. The stretch hurt but at the same time the pressure at his prostate made him come so hard his vision whited out for a second. His own hand shook when he released his own cock.

But then the pressure didn’t disappear. He could still feel Kylo’s obnoxiously huge cock pulse inside of him for what felt like minutes even though it was probably mere seconds.

“Fuck…are you…are you stuck in me or what’s happening?” Hux said. Kylo gasped as an answer.

“Yes, that’s … that’s my knot. It’s how werewolves impregnate their partner,” he said, then chuckled slightly which only caused Hux to jostle on the overly large obstruction in his ass which pressed uncomfortably at his now too sensitive prostate. He took a sharp breath as he tried to steady himself.

“Only I’m gay and don’t want kids so impregnating anyone seems like a long shot with this thing,” Kylo added. He put his large hands on Hux’s hips to steady him. Hux closed his eyes for a moment, he was too overstimulated. And it felt like Kylo was still coming.

“That condom better not break,” Hux muttered. The fullness he had enjoyed earlier became overwhelming by the minute.

“These things are sturdier than they look, don’t worry,” Kylo whispered directly into Hux’s ear, causing him to shy back from the additional stimulation.

“Stop moving, you asshole,” he whimpered, only to hear Kylo to chuckle some more but thankfully not so much that his entire body shook again.

“Just a few minutes,” Kylo said. “It will go down eventually.”

Hux wanted to argue, to complain, anything but he somehow found the pressure to be less and less overwhelming the longer he endured it. In fact, Kylo’s knot was already going down, so much Kylo held onto Hux tightly as he turned them to lie on their sides while jostling his still stuffed ass as little as humanly possible.

“Just so you know, this changes nothing between us,” Hux said when he finally regained his wits. He stabbed his finger into Kylo’s chest for good measure. If Kylo was alarmed the didn’t show it. Instead he carefully dislodged his still inflated cock from Hux so he could make some space between them.

“Do you want me to leave?” he eventually said and sat up. Kylo didn’t seem wounded at all, just curious.

“I don’t want to wake up next to you,” Hux said and turned his back to Kylo. “Until then… do whatever the hell you want.”

He closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep too fast to know if Kylo stayed or left right away. Hux only knew he would come to regret this sooner or later.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux finally makes a decision.

Hux woke up with a groan. No position in bed was good for his aching ass and the scent of coffee and freshly baked pastries permeated the air. His stomach growled in response and Hux found he might as well get up. But getting up meant facing what he did last night and the regret was already making itself known in the back of his head. It couldn’t be helped, really. He got up and was immediately seized by how much his body was still affected by Kylo Ren’s huge cock. It hurt in ways Hux hadn’t felt in a long time. Usually he didn’t find men which were this well-endowed. If he found any at all he liked enough to take home. And the knot – that had been quite the surprise. His poor little asshole still ached from that one.

Still nude his first trip was to the bathroom where the lights felt too bright as he turned them on. He flipped on the shower too since the water tended to stutter between ice-cold and boiling-hot before it became a bearable temperature.

Hux squinted at himself in the mirror only to find his chest littered with bruises from Kylo’s love bites. Most of them were in an area he could easily cover with a shirt but some would simply poke out unless he wore a turtleneck which was something he didn’t even own. Hux touched his own bruised skin, he traced the marks of Kylo’s affection before he groaned quietly and finally slipped into the shower. The hot water did things to his muscles that made him sigh where he stood. For a few minutes he didn’t do anything but stand there and let the warm water rain down on him.

But Hux knew he couldn’t stay in here forever. Especially since he would run out of warm water eventually so he finally started cleaning himself.

Hux stepped into his kitchen in soft lounge pants and a wide shirt to find Kylo filling a cup of coffee at the counter. The freshly baked pastries Hux had smelled earlier where all neatly arranged on a plate on the same counter with a jar of jam on the side which Hux definitely knew he didn’t own.

“You went out?” Hux said instead of wishing Kylo a good morning. Kylo didn’t seem to mind as he looked over his shoulder before turning around.

“Yeah, I borrowed your keys, got you some food, made coffee. Do you like it with sugar or milk? Or both? Neither?” Kylo sounded suspiciously chipper.

“Don’t just take my keys without asking,” Hux muttered, an annoyed frown on his face. Kylo countered with a frown of his own.

“Stop being so ungrateful,” he said in return and held the mug out for Hux to take who grabbed it and took a sip. It was fine, good even. Hux knew he didn’t own coffee this good.

“You can’t make things up to me with a bit of breakfast,” Hux said while looking into his mug. A growl from Kylo made him look up and a second later the mug in his hand was gone and somewhere on another counter while he cowded Hux against another counter. Hux looked at him, at first with shock then in bewilderment. For some reason his body reacted in ways he didn’t want it to. Desire pooled in his belly. He hated that he found this incredibly hot.

“Wha-”

Before Hux could say any more Kylo was running his hands down his body, Hux had to admit that it felt good. He sank down to his knees and pulled Hux’s soft pants down. Without any underwear on Hux’s half-hard dick first hit the cool air and then Kylo’s soft lips and hot breath as he moved closer into his space. Hux knew he could push Kylo away and he would leave but he didn’t want to. He wanted it.

Hux moaned when Kylo’s mouth was on him, engulfing his semi-hard cock. His clever tongue quickly brought Hux to full hardness while his large hands held him in place at the hips.

“Fuck, Kylo,” Hux groaned as he sank a hand into Kylo’s thick hair while his other hand pressed against the counter.

Kylo didn’t waste any time sucking him down to the root before coming back but not without pressing his tongue deliciously tight against the underside of the shaft. His hot mouth wrapped itself briefly around the head of Hux’s cock. Hux shuddered above him, his moans were shameless as he let Kylo blow him.

Kylo’s tongue felt so big and hot, Hux could hardly believe it was a human tongue but a glimpse down didn’t reveal anything unusual about Kylo’s face. He was simply a genius at sucking dick with a mouth as soft as silk. The heat in Hux’s belly was coiling fast. Kylo’s hands had his hips in an iron grip so Hux couldn’t move, couldn’t rut against him, he only had what Kylo was willing to give.

The moment Kylo bobbed his head it was almost over for Hux. He closed his eyes and tried hard not to hold onto Kylo’s hair too tightly as he got his soul sucked out of him through his dick. To add yet another layer of stimulation one of Kylo’s hands reached down to fondle Hux’s balls. He was gentle in a way Hux would’ve never assumed after meeting Kylo a few days ago. It was agonizingly good how hard he tried to get Hux off and it worked so well. But Hux in return tried not to come too fast which proved to be impossible.

“Kylo, I’m…I’m about to-” he stuttered out, expecting Kylo to pull away so he wouldn’t end up with a mouth full of spunk but instead he sank down completely, his lips a tight seal around the root Hux’s cock. It was too much. He threw his head back and came deep inside of Kylo’s throat, he could even feel him swallowing around him.

Hux was still breathlessly leaning against the counter when Kylo pulled off and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

“I care about you, asshole,” Kylo said. His face was blotchy red, his lips slightly swollen and Hux wondered briefly what they would feel against his own but then the moment was over and he remembered how mad he still was at Kylo and how stupid it was to even allow Kylo to do this to him. Again.

Without saying anything he pulled up his pants, grabbed the mug of coffee and a pastry and stalked over to the couch. His breath was still shaky, his heart was beating fast, his cock was still damp in his pants. Hux couldn’t say anything in return to him, he didn’t allow himself to for the fear of becoming too overly sentimental. Instead he decided to be angry and act as if nothing had happened.

Kylo followed him shortly afterwards with a mug of his own but his pastry was cut open and had red jam spread on top of it, he was also nice enough to take a plate which Hux hadn’t and he knew he’d regret it later while cleaning but at the moment he didn’t care as he angrily took another bite. It was delicious. The entire mess his life had become was still Kylo’s fault though and a nice breakfast wouldn’t cut it, wouldn’t make up for it, not even that blowjob could or Kylo’s presence as his bodyguard when he went out.

“Not going out today?” Kylo said after a while of them simply sitting on the couch together in silence. It was late enough for Hux to get ready when he had a shift at the diner. If he had a shift.

“I’m not working until later at the bar today,” Hux said. He exchanged his mug with one of the books from the living room table and opened it where he had inserted a bookmark days ago. With how much stress he had been in reading hadn’t come up on his radar. He was already halfway through this one and there were several more books he planned to read before making another trip to the local library.

At first all was well and Hux read a couple of pages in peace but then he could feel the couch moving from Kylo rocking his foot. Hux looked up from his book to give him a mean stare until he eventually caught on and stopped.

“You know, you can go fuck off and do whatever the hell you want but stop annoying me,” Hux said. “I have precious little time to spend on stuff I actually like doing so you can either sit still or go do something else. Quietly.”

Kylo noisily tapped his fingers against the couch for a second but before Hux could reprimand him again he shot to his feet.

“Fine, I’m taking a bath,” he announced before rushing off. Although Hux tried to conserve water he at least knew a bath would keep Kylo away for at least a bit longer than a shower would so he didn’t stop him. Hux went back to his reading when he heard the bathroom door close. Maybe he could even finish the book today? Hux wasn’t sure, there was still a good chunk left but with Kylo finally occupied he started breezing through the pages, captivated by the story. While he didn’t always read fiction he enjoyed it greatly when he did and this book was no exception.

Hux was almost at the end of the book when Kylo reappeared from the bathroom. He had been gone an awfully long time and Hux didn’t mind it so much. Now that he was back with his hair still slightly wet and hanging into his face he seemed adamant to pace around the living room without talking to Hux. His steps and the movement in the corner of Hux’s eye were still rather annoying. With a sigh he put his bookmark into the book and put it down so he could take a good hard look at Kylo. If he looked a mess before he looked even more so now despite being much cleaner.

“Would you stop that,” Hux said disapprovingly. Kylo stopped dead in his tracks.

“We can’t stay here,” he said with a desperate edge in his voice.

Hux wanted to throw up his hands in protest but instead clutched the book tightly to himself as he sighed deeply.

“Not this again,” he said.

Kylo was suddenly standing way too close to him, too much in his space. At least he smelled good.

“Look Hux, I know you’re scared about money and such but…I have money, I could provide for the both of us and for a good while too,” Kylo said. He was bending down so their faces were close together. It unnerved Hux how crazed the look in Kylo’s eyes was. He raised his hand to push Kylo away but he must have seen it because Kylo moved away on his own. He brushed his wet hair out of his face.

“I have about 20.000 $,” Kylo eventually said. Hux stared at him for a moment. Maybe he didn’t hear him correctly?

Sensing his confusing Kylo rattled on.

“I put the money away on a bank account while I was working for Snoke. A little bit at a time. No one but me knows about it. And then when I ran away I withdrew it all. No traces,” Kylo said. His gaze went from crazed to pleading as he focused on Hux who didn’t know what to say. The book in his hands fell into his lap. He didn’t even know anymore what having this kind of money felt like. It was so much more than he currently had. Hell, he didn’t even make this much money in a YEAR. But it was Kylo fucking Ren who tried to take him away from the only life he knew.

“I… I’ll have to think about it. Let me sleep over it, alright?” Hux said. Kylo took a nervous breath and nodded at him. He looked so lost where he stood so Hux gestured to the empty stop next to himself on the sofa.

“You know, I wouldn’t mind if you also read a book or two,” he said.

Kylo smirked at him for a moment.

“As long as I’m quiet?” he said and Hux nodded.

He was back on the couch and picked up a book from the living room table. Shortly afterwards he was quietly reading next to Hux and it had the opposite effect on Hux than the one he had wished for. Somehow having Kylo next to him proved to be rather distracting.

The worry in Kylo’s face was back even while he concentrated on his book. It was some sort of crime mystery or whatever, not that it really mattered.

Somehow Hux had to think back to the time when they were still in high school together and did their homework at Ben’s living room table. Or when they studied together in his bedroom. Or really any other time they spent quietly together, simply being in one another’s presence. How nice it had been whenever Hux fell asleep in Ben’s arms when they were done with school work, how he never said anything stupid or judgmental when Hux complained to him about his father. He even had to think about those times when Ben brought him cookies his father made – the man really had a talent for cooking and baking. A deep ache went through Hux’s chest as he thought about it. He missed those simple times when he could steal a little bit of happiness for himself every now and then. If only he could turn back time and be with Ben again.

He glanced over to Kylo one more time and thought to himself he could almost imagine him being the boy from back then, minus the scar on his face.

While the anger in Hux about Kylo messing up his life was still there, it became a struggle when the nostalgia hit him. Like a pesky background noise. Hux felt a tightness in his chest, the conflicting feelings annoyed him.

Much later Hux was back at work at the bar, once again with Kylo nearby to keep trouble away from him. The heat of the club was sweltering where Hux prepared drink after drink behind the bar. They were packed full. At least Gabrielle was there with him, she was still his favorite coworker, even if she was currently ribbing him at every turn about Kylo allegedly making ‘googly eyes’ at him. Hux was too busy to even check. The man was supposed to keep murderous werewolves off his back so Hux severely doubted Kylo even had the time to look at him funny.

“You know, you could use the back room for 5 minutes if you liked,” she said as she passed him a new bottle of vodka which Hux quickly unscrewed. He scoffed but it might have been lost over the swell of the music. She still grinned at his expense. It was then when her back was turned that a stranger tried leaning over the bar, a sleazy grin plastered on his face. Only he couldn’t because Kylo shoved him aside with a growl which Hux could hear over the din of the music. Hux almost dropped the bottle he was holding. Usually a snarling, growling, muscular man would be enough to deter most people but the old sleazy guy certainly didn’t know what was good for him. He tried to swing at Kylo but Kylo easily evaded him, his right fist was quick to retaliate with a punch of his own, straight to the guy’s face. It didn’t knock him out and he tried swinging back. Hux could only watch frozen on the spot, his brain focused on this man fighting for him. Hux couldn’t even hear the roar of the crowd, the beat of the music, only his own heartbeat was loud in his ears as he looked on as Kylo fought a complete stranger for him.

A touch at his arm broke him out of his frozen state. Gabrielle pulled him away from the bar, she was shouting something he couldn’t quite make out. Hux watched as two of their security guys walked the sleazy stranger off and presumably out of the door while leaving Kylo behind.

“You’re fucking lucky the other guy is your boyfriend or they would’ve thrown him out too,” Hux could Gabrielle say into his ear. He had never heard her this angry before. Hux took a breath but stopped himself just in time so he wouldn’t yell out loud how Kylo wasn’t his boyfriend. But he couldn’t lose his only protection from a pack of crazy werewolves who wanted to do who-knows-what with him. Turn him? Kill him? Or just torture him? Hux’s blood ran cold at the thought. No, he couldn’t risk pissing Kylo off this time. Hux didn’t want to walk home alone.

Kylo was back at the bar. He looked a little bit roughed up and when their eyes met he shook his head. No werewolf. Not that Hux thought one old guy who couldn’t understand boundaries would be one.

“Come on,” Gabrielle said before going back to her own work. Hux took a deep breath and went back to working the bar. His hands didn’t want to become steady so he finally put down the bottle of vodka he was still holding. They were still shaking when he mixed a new drink for a young guy who pointedly avoided standing next to Kylo as he politely asked for a cocktail.

Kylo’s words from earlier today kept echoing in Hux’s head while he worked. 20,000 $. Running away with Kylo sounded really good in this very moment. No more of this, no more sleazy men treating him like a piece of meat, no more standing on his aching feet for hours to no end, no more hustling at two jobs that just about paid enough so he could survive in a shitty apartment.

Hux didn’t know if there was a life away from this place, close to Kylo Ren, on the run from a pack of werewolves but he knew they found him once and they would find him again, especially if he decided to be a sitting duck. Kylo was right.

Hux took the dirty glasses from the bar before he turned to Gabrielle. His intentions were clear in his mind and yet, his hands were still shaking with nerves.

“I need a break,” Hux said to her and she gave him a nod.

“Sure, take 5, splash a bit of water in your face maybe,” she said. Gabrielle looked deservedly annoyed with him but Hux wasn’t one to care. He ripped off his apron and made his way from the bar to the staff room without even wasting a thought on how Kylo might react or if he might try and follow. None of it mattered until Hux was finally behind the closed door of the tiny yet tidy staff room.

The breath he took there shuddered out of him again to the beat of his overly loud heart. Was he panicking? Hux couldn’t tell. Maybe he was just one step away from dying.

“What do you think you’re doing back here? It’s not your break yet.”

The booming sound of the night manager’s voice had Hux’s head snap around towards him. This man, Moden Canady, never had any love for him. In fact, Hux wasn’t even sure he liked anyone but apparently he was good friends with the owner so they kept him on. He was the bane of Hux’s existence when it came to his work at the bar. Hux could only stare back at him, dread in his eyes.

Canady’s face was turning more and more red by the second. Hux knew he was about to bark but for once, instead of arguing with him, instead of screaming back at him, he just calmly put the apron he still gripped in his one hand down on the staff room table.

“I quit,” Hux said and turned to leave. He could hear Canady sputtering something behind him but Hux’s conviction was clear. He was done with this place and he was done with this job. When the door closed behind him Hux found himself back in the club, the noise droned around him like a threat to his ears.

“Hey. There you are. Don’t run off like that.” It was Kylo this time. He sounded rather concerned yet annoyed as he spoke over the din of the music. Hux had to get out of here. He grabbed Kylo’s arm and pulled him away, through the crowd of people, out of the club and into the fresh air.

Kylo put his hands on Hux’s shoulders and looked at him, he searched his face for something, Hux didn’t know what. It was then that it hit him like a ton of bricks.

“I quit my job,” he whispered, unbelieving. Then he repeated it louder while he shrugged Kylo’s hands off.

“Let’s get out of here. Let’s do it. Fuck it. I’m done with this place and I’m done with waiting for those crazy werewolves to find me,” Hux said, his back turned to Kylo as he started to walk away. One might think he was mental, talking as loud as he did but if anyone of the people in the street thought it they sure didn’t care to say it loud enough for Hux to hear. Kylo easily caught up with him.

“Are you serious?” he said, still unbelieving.

“Absolutely. I don’t want to be a sitting duck forever,” Hux said. The reality of it was like a huge weight on his shoulders. Eventually there would be too many werewolves for Kylo to fight off and then what? Hux wasn’t interested in dying… or worse. At least Kylo Ren didn’t try to turn him into a werewolf.

They didn’t really talk on the way back to Hux’s apartment building. What was there even to talk about anyway?

Once back Hux started packing the most practical of his clothes. He figured he wouldn’t need the ratty suit in his closet, neither any of the dress shoes. Instead he focused on things like outdoor wear, something that would keep him warm in a pinch and all the underwear and socks he could find except if there were holes. Those he didn’t need. The only thing of value he packed that wasn’t clothes was an old photo of his birth mother. It was the only one he had. Hux wrapped the small frame into an old shirt so it would at least not spread glass anywhere in case it broke.

Outside his bedroom Hux could hear Kylo moving around. He had decided to pack up the books for Hux since they were going to drop them off at the library on their way out of town. Thankfully the place had an over-night chute where one could simply deposit the books after hours. There was another thing though that had Hux temporarily return to the living room where Kylo perked up immediately.

“I need to pay my rent in advance,” Hux announced. “So I have a place I can return to once this is all over.”

Kylo made a face.

“You know, there’s a good chance the pack will trash up your place,” he said but then his hand disappeared into the inside of his jacket he was still wearing only to return with a thick wad of cash.

“But okay, give this to your landlord or mail it to them or whatever...”

Hux stared at the cash for a moment. It had been such a long time since he’d seen this much money in one place. Without another word he snatched it from Kylo’s hand. Hux couldn’t see his reaction since he turned away fast enough to avoid it before he went back to his bedroom to check if he thought of everything he wanted to pack in regards of clothes. Sure, those were just things and they could always buy clothes somewhere but Hux felt they might as well avoid mingling with others if possible.

“Are you quite done yet?” Kylo said from the living room, loud enough for Hux to hear. It jolted him out of his thoughts. This would have to be enough. He zipped up the bag and picked it up.

“I’m done,” Hux said as he walked out of the bedroom for probably the last time in a long time. Kylo was waiting for him with all the library books in a canvas bag, the same one Hux always used for them. But this time it felt weird taking them back. Some of them he didn’t even have the time to read yet.

They were out of the door without another word, Hux locked up behind them despite knowing it would make little difference to a werewolf. He still pocketed the key with the tiniest hope in the back of his mind that he would see his place again. The hallway was dark despite them turning the lights on. Those shitty, shitty lights. Hux thought he might even miss those, as weird as it sounded even to him.

On their way down Hux stopped at his landlord’s apartment. Even though it was late it couldn’t be considered the middle of the night and with Kylo a few steps away Hux didn’t have to worry about any trouble should it arise. Not that he thought his landlord would give him much trouble. Still, Hux felt nervous when he pressed the bell. There were sounds coming from behind the door and before it even opened Hux had already fumbled the money Kylo had given him earlier out of his pocket.

Then he was face to face with his landlord who, for the lack of a better word, looked rough and certainly unhappy to see Hux at this hour.

“Sorry for disturbing you this late,” Hux said hurriedly. The man wanted to say something, probably something rude but then glimpsed the money in Hux’s hand.

“Yeah?” he said instead.

Somehow Hux managed to convince the man to let him pay for 4 months in advance. Only when the money left Hux’s hands did he realize how much it really was. Way too much and Kylo had told him earlier there was more of it. It felt insane and yet he followed Kylo outside without looking back. Hux didn’t ask where they were going as he walked alongside of Kylo. He had to hold back looking over his shoulder every five seconds.

They were walking a few blocks when Kylo brought Hux to an indoor parking where they went up to the third floor.

“You had a car this entire time and we still had to walk?” Hux said. His nerves were already on edge but now he really was annoyed.

“Yeah, sorry,” Kylo said as they walked down the rows of parked cars. “I couldn’t risk the pack finding it and taking it apart so I paid someone to wipe it down with vinegar. Also had them spray some other pet repellent on it. They thought I was crazy but… I know what makes a wolf lose a trail.”

While Hux stood nearby, Kylo put on a tiny flashlight which was previously dangling from his key chain to check the car. He even squatted down to check the tires up close, under the car, he walked around it twice before eventually propping up the hood. For a moment Hux thought him extreme in his antics but with how the werewolves had previously attacked him he didn’t dare say anything. Kylo was probably right to look. It would be bad if they got stranded in the middle of the road, too far from any proper help. The thought made Hux shudder. It was a chance to get them, to take them or kill them both, out there somewhere on a deserted street in the middle of the night.

A thought came to Hux so he pulled out his phone and composed a text message to Poe, his boss at the diner. After all, if he was going away for an unforeseeable time it was only fair to quit his job and let Poe fill his space with someone else who could actually turn up for work.

“You know,” Hux said as he wrote, “maybe we need to ditch the car later for another one at some point.”

Hux looked over his text again before sending it in hopes Poe wouldn’t be suspicious and call the police or try and check on him. With the claims of it being for personal reasons he really hoped no one would come looking for him. In the meantime Kylo was done checking the car’s insides.

“What are you doing?” he said as he walked over.

“Just sending my boss at the diner a text to let him know I’m quitting. It’s late, I don’t know when he’ll read it,” Hux said. When he found the text to be good enough he sent it off. Hux waited for a moment to see if Poe would come online and read it and sure enough, the dots appeared and he was writing. It felt weird having Kylo look over his shoulder but Hux couldn’t fault him for being curious. Not at a time like this anyway.

“Do you think he’ll buy it?” Kylo said.

“I mean, people quit because of personal reasons all the time. He’s not an asshole, he’ll be fine with it,” Hux said. If it weren’t for the immediate threat of a pack of werewolves being at their heels Hux would probably feel at least a little bit bad for Poe. As it was he couldn’t waste a useless feeling on someone who wasn’t in mortal danger as opposed to himself.

Poe’s answer came after a moment, wishing Hux good luck with his future projects and so on.

“Alright,” Kylo said and took the phone from him.

“Hey! What are you-”

“Sorry, but I can’t risk Snoke tracking us,” Kylo said. Hux watched in horror as Kylo pulled the phone apart, first he bent the SIM card and chucked it into the gutter, then he removed the battery. For a second Hux feared Kylo would smash the entire thing there and then but it appeared to be enough for him to simply pocket the battery and the phone.

“Do you really think he has that much power?” Hux said, his eyebrows scrunched in disbelief. To him this Snoke character was a phantom. Even if he was as powerful as Kylo claimed, Hux still doubted he could track his phone. But he didn’t bring it up, instead Hux followed Kylo over to the car where he put his bag onto the backseat before climbing into the front passenger seat. Kylo had already put the bag with the library books in the back.

“I guess you’re right though,” Kylo said. “I guess we should ditch the car at some point.”

Before he started the car he handed Hux the pieces of his phone.

“Don’t put the battery back in for now,” Kylo said. Hux looked at his phone for a moment. He could feel the first tendrils of a headache threatening to make a stressful evening even worse. At least he knew Poe wouldn’t do anything stupid, or so he hoped. Without his SIM card the phone was a lot less useful. He reached back to stuff both the phone and the battery into his bag before buckling up.

“We still need to go to the library,” Hux said. “To return the books. I don’t want them to try and charge me.”

Kylo looked over for a moment.

“I didn’t forget about it,” he eventually said. Kylo started the car and drove off, out of the parking garage. It felt since forever that Hux had been in a car with someone. He tried to relax as Kylo drove and soon with the help of Hux’s directions they found themselves at the library. Kylo parked the car as close to the entrance as he could. Hux didn’t even protest when he came along to the drop-off chute.

“Feels weird,” Hux said as he started putting in books from the bag which Kylo held open for him. After this it would be goodbye to this place, to this town. Hux knew he’d greatly miss the library.

“We can get you books, don’t worry,” Kylo said.

“That’s not it,” Hux muttered. Not entirely. He knew people here, even if he didn’t have close friends there were still people who’s company he enjoyed. Hux had a life here. Sure, it wasn’t the best life and he could’ve done better for himself, probably, but it was a life and it was his. But now he couldn’t go back. He was without a job and a pack of wolves was at his heels. It couldn’t have gone on like this forever, just with his own personal wolf guarding him. Eventually they would have overwhelmed Kylo with sheer numbers.

“Come on, let’s get going,” Kylo said, his voice somewhat rough as he turned away. Hux looked at the library one more time before he joined him in the car.

Before Kylo turned the key in the engine he cleared his throat.

“I know you don’t want to hear it right now but… I’m glad you changed your mind. And I’m sorry,” Kylo said.

Hux didn’t say anything. He didn’t know if he even could find any words. Instead he leaned back and looked out of the window as Kylo eventually started the car and drove them into the night. Hux didn’t pay much attention as they made their way out of town and eventually onto the highway. He let his heavy eyes fall shut as he drifted off into an unruly sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please check the End Notes for additional content warnings.

Hux woke up to the darkness of the night, he wasn’t sure how long he’d been sleeping but it couldn’t have been for long. As he looked over to Kylo he found the man staring straight forward, his eyes looked darker than usual, tired.

“You know, I could take over driving if you like,” Hux said, his voice still affected. He sniffled, then coughed a little. Sleep was still clinging to him.

“I got this,” Kylo said. “Don’t worry about it.”

Hux watched him drive for a little while longer before turning his gaze back to the front window. Only a few cars were passing them. A glance to the dashboard confirmed that it was the middle of the night. Kylo had to be just as tired as him and yet he tightly clutched the steering wheel.

“Where are we going, anyway?” Hux eventually said. He wished they at least had the radio on. If it weren’t for the noise of the car the silence between them would for sure be deafening.

“Eventually? Republic City,” Kylo said. Hux couldn’t help but stare at him for a moment. Surely Kylo lost his damn mind.

“Why there? That’s extremely far away,” he said. Hux couldn’t even remember the last time he’d been there.

“Cities are easier to hide in. Lots of people, lots of smells. Hiding in the country side means less neighbors who are more nosy. City people usually mind their own damn business,” Kylo said. Hux hated to admit it but he was right. At least in the city no one would look at them twice and Republic City was so big most people surely didn’t even know their neighbor’s names. It was the perfect solution to a delicate problem.

Instead of saying anything Hux watched Kylo for a little while longer before he turned his attention back to himself. Sleeping in the car made his neck hurt just enough for him to move his head around to ease the tension. Kylo still didn’t spare him even one glance. On one hand it meant he wouldn’t drive them into a ditch, on the other hand Hux could feel the tiniest wish inside of him to be acknowledged by his travel companion. Not just by his words, but also the need to be seen took hold of Hux. He didn’t know why, or how. He told himself it was because Kylo was the only person he had left in his life. That had to be it. Of course, even before Hux suddenly decided to leave everything behind he didn’t really have anyone to confide him. His coworkers didn’t count. They didn’t know him as much as Kylo did, despite their distance, the long time they hadn’t seen each other, Kylo was all he had left.

“You know,” Kylo eventually said, startling Hux out of his thoughts. It was embarrassing to know he even flinched at Kylo’s voice.

“We can stay at a motel. Just for tonight.”

The idea of sleeping in an actual bed instead of the car was enticing. Hux shrugged, he decided to play it off even though his neck was still hurting a little.

“Sure,” he said.

After maybe an hour or so longer Kylo actually left the road and steered them towards a motel at the outskirts of a town. It was like the typical motel Hux had seen so often in movies and TV shows. Not quite run down but not as polished as an actual hotel. It would do for one night. Hux was dragging his feet a little when they walked to the front desk to get a room with two separate beds. In the back of his mind Hux wondered if they would really end up using both beds. Maybe he gave in at least a little bit when it came to letting Kylo get close to him. Maybe it was a bad idea. Hux didn’t care anymore.

He let Kylo do all the talking and wordlessly followed when they made their way to their room which turned out to be not as bad as Hux imagined it. Sure, the carpet had a pattern that made it hard to see stains and the bed sheets were a beige which might have been white at some point but otherwise it wasn’t so bad. The beds were far enough apart, they even had an obligatory TV and the room didn’t smell bad, at least not to Hux’s nose. If it was clean and dry he really couldn’t complain.

He put down his bag next to a bed before letting himself fall into it. His shoes hit the carpeted floor with a slight thump after he toed them off. Hux didn’t even care to pull off his jacket as he turned his face into the pillow.

Of course he didn’t want to go to sleep in his jacket when there was an actual blanket but for now Hux simply wanted to rest. In the meantime he could hear Kylo shuffle around somewhere behind him. Hux perked up when he heard a loud thump somewhere in the direction of the door. It intrigued him enough to push himself out of the pillow with the intention of checking what Kylo was doing.

For some reason Kylo had dragged the mattress of the other bed over to the door where he put it down in front of it. He put down one of the pillows on it as well as a blanket.

“What are you doing?” Hux said, his eyebrows drawn together.

“I’m sleeping here so no one can sneak in through that door during the night,” Kylo said while he was pulling his own shoes and jacket off.

“Isn’t this a bit much? We’re quite some way outside of town in a motel that probably smells like a thousand other people passing through every week. Are you really this scared of that Snoke character?” Hux said. Kylo’s weird behavior gave him enough energy to at least open his bag and look for something to wear to sleep. Kylo’s eyes widened for a moment, his body froze.

“You have no idea,” he said quietly. Of course Hux didn’t know how bad Snoke really was but something in Kylo’s expression momentarily chilled him to the bone. To distract himself he changed out of his clothes and into something more comfortable, his heart suddenly beating faster at a tiny thought at the back of his mind, a mere fantasy of Snoke actually catching up to them. Hux shook the thought off. He left Kylo to deal with his bedding situation while he took a little bathroom time for himself. Somehow brushing his teeth felt even better after falling asleep in a car. Probably because his mouth had gone dry from sleep.

When he returned Kylo was already settled into his bed on the floor. Hux elected to not comment further on it even if he still had questions. Sure, Kylo had told him a vague story about how bad Snoke really was but he still had some questions. Instead of asking them he slipped into his chosen bed and turned off the lights. But sleep didn’t want to come easily, not even after turning onto his side to face the door where Kylo lay on a mattress on the floor. It felt unsettling to see a figure lying on the floor and Hux almost turned away so he wouldn’t have to watch.

Hux sighed.

“Fine, you can sleep next to me,” he said. It was quiet for a moment and Hux thought maybe Kylo had already drifted off to sleep but then he heard some shuffling, his own bed dipped and Kylo settled in against his back as a warm, solid presence. It was a tight fit but they still managed somehow. Neither of them said anything and yet Hux felt a lot safer as he drifted off to sleep.

Hux didn’t know how late or early it was in the morning when his eyes slowly blinked open. Kylo’s arms were holding him, they pressed his back securely against his strong, warm chest. Carefully Hux turned his head to get a glimpse of the clock on the wall only to see that it was somewhere around 5 am. Hux closed his eyes again, thinking he might get a few more hours of sleep.

A movement against his abdomen startled him slightly and had him freeze where he lay.

“I know you’re awake,” Kylo’s hot breath came against his ear. His hand dipped much deeper and Hux didn’t want him to stop. Instead he sighed and closed his eyes. Kylo’s warm hand was heavy as it dipped into his pants and stroked over his slowly rising cock. A tiny noise escaped Hux as he wiggled his butt against Kylo’s crotch. Right now he wanted to try and pretend this was alright. That he could enjoy Kylo’s hand on him without consequences, without any feelings involved. Like the other times he let Kylo touch him intimately.

Kylo wasn’t exactly being rough with him but his grip was so tight Hux couldn’t suppress a drawn-out moan which escaped him unbidden, his head leaned back on reflex.

It was getting too much. Hux didn’t even think about it when he turned around in Kylo’s arms, startling him momentarily before moving on top of him.

“Hux, wha-”

Kylo’s words where cut off by a moan of his own as Hux rubbed both their hard cocks together, his own exposed while Kylo’s was still in the confines of his shorts. But not for long, Hux reached and pulled him out so he could rub them both together. Kylo’s hands tried to steady him by putting his hands on Hux’s hips but it felt more as if he tried to steady himself, his own breath was mostly moans and small sighs. Hux couldn’t tear his eyes away from Kylo’s bobbing cock, he swiped his thumb over the head to collect the dripping pre-come from both of them to make his grip more slippery. Hux wasn’t sure what felt better, the stimulation or being in charge, to see Kylo under him like this. Either way, he couldn’t look away from where he pressed their dicks together, even if the sight of Kylo’s face made him weak. It felt good as he moved his hips – the friction, the control, the slippery feeling of his own hand. Kylo’s knot expanded slowly at the base, catching Hux’s attention immediately. His hand couldn’t even encircle both of them under normal circumstances but the knot made it even more impossible. Still, it felt different when it bumped against Hux, good but different. He had never seen anything like Kylo’s knot before. That one time it had been buried in his ass didn’t count since Hux couldn’t even see it back then before it happened. His arousal was pooling in his belly, it had been for quite a while but the fascination with Kylo’s cock had him distracted long enough not to let it spill over immediately after feeling the knot. Still, his hips worked hard to generate good friction for the both of them. So much, Kylo eventually reached to grasp their cocks in a good, tight grip to jerk them himself. It was so good Hux teetered immediately off the edge with Kylo following shortly after.

Hux swore under his breath as he removed his sticky hand. For the first time since he climbed on top off Kylo he actually looked properly at him, really, really looked at him. He was so worn out, as if the stress of it all finally caught up with him. And yet underneath he was as beautiful as ever, even with the scar on his face. Kylo’s breath was slowly but surely normalizing as their eyes met and Hux thought to himself maybe he could give him another chance. And yet he couldn’t stop thinking of how he could be in his own bed right about now, still asleep and without a need to wake up for a few more hours.

Hux moved off of him without a word. He reached for the tissues on the bedside table before he cleared his throat.

“Did you even sleep at all?” he said. From the darkness of Kylo’s rings under his eyes Hux could guess the answer would probably be ‘no’.

“Every now and again,” Kylo said after a moment of quiet. “Been drifting off a little there and then.” Even his voice sounded tired.

The thought of having a traffic accident due to Kylo being half-asleep behind the wheel simply didn’t appeal to Hux.

“I could drive,” Hux said. He tossed the tissue box to Kylo who only barely caught it. From the look on his face Hux could tell he was less than excited about the suggestion. He sighed deeply.

“Fine,” he eventually said. “You can drive and I’ll get a little more sleep.”

In the last three or four days or so Hux had learned a lot more about Kylo Ren than he didn’t even know he didn’t know. Mostly about his sexual appetite close to the full moon. Because it seemed he was always turned on. Or maybe it was simply because laying low at the one-bedroom apartment they rented became very boring very quickly since they didn’t have much else to pass the time apart from looking outside the window.

Kylo’s ridiculously overbearing cautiousness meant they were holed up as long as they had food and they had enough of it due to them stocking up on protein bars and stuff like instant noodles. At least they got some of the flavors Hux actually liked and not only that beef stuff Kylo craved for some reason possibly linked to him being a werewolf. Hux wanted to think Kylo was overdoing it but sometimes he caught the way his eyes widened in terror whenever he thought he saw something from the window. It was quite telling.

Hux didn’t know which he felt more nervous about, the approaching full moon or the threat of the werewolf pack potentially finding them. So far Hux wasn’t sure what happened to Kylo during the full moon. If he could control himself or not. Maybe Hux would be in mortal danger and he didn’t even know it yet.

“Wanna go again?” Kylo said next to him on the bed for the third time that day. Unlike Hux, Kylo didn’t even care to put any clothes on, he was under the threadbare blanket without anything between it and his bare skin. Hux knew it was mostly out of boredom and Kylo was a considerate enough lover who always made sure to make him feel good too but there had to be something more to life than eat, sleep, fuck, rinse and repeat.

“My dick feels chafed and my ass is still sore,” Hux muttered. It wasn’t a total lie, his ass did feel a bit tender and the last time they had done it Kylo’s hand on his dick hadn’t felt all that great either. It was too much. He was completely fucked-out. Hux never thought it possible but for the first time he actually moved out of Kylo’s reach.

“I need some fresh air,” he said as he got up. When Hux reached for his jacket Kylo was already on his feet with one hand tentatively reaching for Hux’s arm.

“It’s not safe,” he said with his face full of worry. His big, dark eyes would otherwise be enough to convince Hux to stay but not this time. He felt suffocated, almost oppressed by staying cooped up for so long. He simply couldn’t take it anymore.

“You said it yourself, nothing is going on out there,” Hux said with a sweeping motion towards the window which overlooked the street. “I even dyed my hair for you because you asked me to and I hate it.”

Not that he was extremely proud of his ginger hair but the cheap temporary dye they bought didn’t even cover it properly. There was still a glint of orange whenever the light hit his now brown hair and his unshaven face exposed the truth about him anyway. When Kylo opened his mouth to talk Hux quickly continued.

“At least let me go for a short walk. We’re out of condoms anyway and we’re low on lube. Besides, some fresh food every once in a while won’t hurt.”

Kylo’s nostrils flared and for a second Hux thought he might start an argument but then he cursed under his breath.

“Fine,” he muttered and went to grab some of his clothes which were thrown carelessly over their only chair. “I’m coming along.”

Hux sighed, mostly because he wanted to go by himself even though he knew it was impossible in their current situation. After living alone for such a long time it felt strange and sometimes like it was too much to bear to be around someone at all times. Besides, Kylo didn’t shower as often as he himself did. Even after they had sex he would simply laze around in his own sweat and come and instead of cleaning off properly he’d get a washcloth to clean his dick and not much else. He was a mess.

Even later with his jacket on and hood up he was embarrassing to walk next to. Aat least the wind freshened Kylo’s smell up a little and Hux didn’t have to breathe in his stink so much.

A convenience store in the distance quickly caught Hux’s attention. Even mundane things such as shopping for groceries seemed better than being cooped up with Ren for an entire week. Next to him, Kylo bristled when Hux steered them towards the store but he didn’t say anything. Not yet anyway. Even if Hux tried, he couldn’t ignore him. Of the two of them Kylo was the only person who could tell if someone was a werewolf. Unfortunately he needed him, paranoid behavior or not.

When Hux spotted fresh produce he made a beeline for it. His mouth watered when he saw all those nicely colored fruits. He quickly picked out a couple of apples and oranges. Not too many but still enough so they would both at least get something. Kylo was at his side the entire time, even if he didn’t try and make conversation or even commented on any of the things Hux put in his shopping basket. He even eyed a few candy bars which he then didn’t take, instead Hux put in some protein bars. The type Kylo liked best.

Without saying anything Kylo put a handful of candy bars into the basket, the exact kind Hux was looking at earlier. Somehow Hux couldn’t mind but appreciate the gesture. At least until Kylo suddenly froze.

“We need to leave,” he said through gritted teeth. “I’ve seen some of them down a few isles. Smelled them too.”

Hux’s breath caught for a moment, then he tried his best to look normal as they made their way to the checkout area. At least they could still buy the food before they had to leave town. Kylo was anxiously tapping his foot as they waited and even though Hux wished Kylo would be wrong, that they were safe, he couldn’t risk not trusting him. The moment they were out of the shop Kylo grasped his hand, his other held the shabby plastic bag with their food. They didn’t talk. Instead Kylo’s steps were fast as he led Hux the way back to the room they rented. Hux didn’t dare ask if Kylo thought they lost them, didn’t want to draw any attention to them. His heart was pounding so loud in his own ears he wondered if Kylo could hear it.

“Let’s grab what we can and then get out of here,” Kylo said when they got to the building. It was a risk to go back up there but somehow Hux felt glad for it.

“I’ll wait down here, go get our stuff,” Kylo said and pressed the keys into Hux’s hand who in exchange gave him the plastic bag. One less thing he had to worry about as he sprinted upstairs, taking two steps at a time. At least they weren’t far up, just on the third floor but by the time Hux reached the door he was terribly winded. It would have been embarrassing if he didn’t have other priorities.

He quickly unlocked the door and slipped in. Hux took a shuddering breath as he surveyed the room. They had left quite the mess behind but at least it was a familiar mess, not one someone else had caused. Hux didn’t even care to sort out their things as he put everything into their two bags, lube and condoms included before shouldering them both. He made a strained sound. The bags were heavy but Hux knew it was best for him to deal with their things while Kylo stopped potential trouble from coming up the stairs. There wasn’t time to check if he had everything as he hurried down the stairs, the apartment key clutched tightly in his hand. Somehow Hux couldn’t even think of what to do with it as he reached the end of the hallway, both bags slung over his shoulders, out of breath and the metal digging into the palm of his hand.

“The key,” he said as Kylo took the bags from him.

“Right. I’ll just put it here,” Kylo said and took the key from Hux’s hand. Without much ado he went over to the mailboxes, pulled the one owned by the landlord open with his bare hands and put the key inside. Hux watched in awe as Kylo bent it back as if it were paper before turning to him.

“Let’s go.”

They rushed out of the door, toward the car. Thankfully enough they had the chance to park it on the curb in front of the building without much trouble, in reach in case they had to run. Kylo threw the bags on the backseat while Hux was already busy putting on the safety belt.

“Did you get everything?” Kylo said as he turned on the ignition. The car roared to life under them.

“I’m not sure, I grabbed what I could,” Hux said. It wasn’t as if the place they had rented was so big one could lose anything. He quickly locked his door, just in case since Kylo still had to reverse out of his parking space. Hux’s heart was still pounding hard in his chest, his eyes wild as he scanned the street.

“I got everything from the bathroom but I just stuffed it into the bags without looking who’s it is,” Hux said. It was the most he could’ve done. Kylo didn’t comment on it, he only gave him a nod. They weren’t out of the water just yet, they still had to leave town. And even though they were on the run, Hux noticed how Kylo did his best to drive safely and with respect to the speed limit.

It wasn’t until they reached the freeway that Hux felt his heartbeat normalize. He wondered if Kylo knew those guys he had seen earlier. If they had even noticed him. But Hux knew asking any of these questions wouldn’t be helpful at all. Eventually those werewolves would’ve sniffed them out, he knew that much. Especially this close to the full moon.

Instead of asking anything, Hux leaned back and let his gaze wander out of the window. Maybe he’d take a nap at some point. It wasn’t important, really. Without a clear destination he knew of they were simply driving. For now Hux enjoyed the silence.

“Ah, shit,” Kylo said at some point. It was already evening and they had spent the entire day driving with only a few rest stops to stretch their legs, eat some of their few supplies and generally rest.

“We’re almost out of gas,” he said with a pained sigh.

“Did you fill the canister in the boot?” Hux said. Kylo’s brows furrowed. Oh, he definitely didn’t if he had to think about it this long.

“Forgot about it,” Kylo muttered. They were somewhere on a deserted highway, basically in the middle of nowhere. There were barely any other cars on the street either. Any other day Hux would’ve berated Kylo for it, blamed him for it but at the moment he was tired. Too tired to get angry. Too tired to even think of starting an argument.

He didn’t even say anything when Kylo drove the car off the highway and onto a side street near a small forest. How could he say anything? It was a full moon night and Hux wasn’t too sure what might happen.

“Might as well stay here for the night,” Kylo said while he parked. “I know it’s not fun sleeping in the car but it’s better than trying to get gas right now.”

“Better than being werewolf food I guess,” Hux said tiredly and with a shrug. He looked up from where he stared at the dashboard when Kylo put his hand on his arm.

“It’s going to be alright,” he said and the roguish smile of his was almost convincing if Hux hadn’t known better. The werewolves might chase them to the end of the world if they had the chance.

“You know what? The car is still warm. Let’s get a blanket,” Kylo said before he opened the door and got out so he could rummage around the backseat. Hux watched him for a moment before he too got out. Maybe eating something outside wasn’t so bad, he thought to himself as he grabbed some of the food they put aside earlier. Especially since Hux felt the need to stretch his legs after driving for so long.

Kylo spread their only blanket on the hood of the car and climbed on. He gave the space next to him a pat before offering Hux a hand up.

A while ago he wouldn’t have accepted Kylo’s hand but being as tired as he already was Hux took it and let himself be helped up on the hood.

It was almost fully dark as they looked up to the sky, snacking on protein bars.

“I’ve never done anything like this before,” Hux whispered thoughtlessly. His last boyfriend didn’t even have a car and barely a romantic bone in his body.

“I used to do this with my dad when I was still a kid,” Kylo said, a quiet chuckle escaped him. It was so peaceful out here and yet Hux couldn’t shake the fear of not knowing what might happen to Kylo during the full moon. Would he become a feral best? Did he have to worry about it? Even with the stars twinkling above them he couldn’t relax. Kylo must have felt it since he turned towards him, worry on his face.

“Are you alright? Are you worried they’ll find us out here? You know it’s very unlikely, we’re in the middle of nowhere,” Kylo said but Hux could only shake his head. He then looked up to the sky where the last few clouds uncovered a full, round moon. Kylo followed his gaze and stared at it as if fascinated before he let out a mocking howl which had Hux flinch badly, followed by a burst of laughter.

“Don’t do that, you asshole,” Hux said, his heartbeat fast in his chest as he swatted at Kylo’s arm. The car shook as Kylo got down. He walked a few steps before he looked up again towards the moon.

“You’re right, I should do this properly,” he said and to Hux’s surprise he started to strip out of his clothes. It wasn’t anything he hadn’t seen before and yet, Hux couldn’t stop watching. That was until Kylo’s shirt came flying towards him and Hux had to catch it before it could hit him in the face. The rest of Kylo’s clothes where idly flung on top of the hood of the car, his shoes stood next to one of the front wheels as he peeled them off, hopping on one foot, then the other. He was quite the sight, this gorgeous man naked in the middle of nowhere under the bright full moon. Before Hux could even say anything, Kylo’s body changed in front of him, fur grew all over his skin as his limbs changed. Kylo had turned his back to him so Hux couldn’t see how his face transformed, at least not until he finally turned around, alerted by Hux’s quiet gasp he let out at the sight of the fully transformed werewolf. Like this Kylo was at least a head taller than usual even while hunched over slightly. Hux couldn’t help but scoot back where he sat even though it was quite the futile attempt at evading the werewolf Kylo Ren. His heart beat up to his throat at the sight of Kylo approaching him. If there was any intelligence in his eyes, Hux wasn’t able to see it in the dark of the night even with the bright full moon above them, instead his eyes were two reflective disks.

Hux’s back pressed painfully against the windshield when Kylo was already there, way too close as he looked at him. Only by how slowly he moved could Hux tell that Kylo wasn’t trying to scare him. He reached out carefully, his heart still beating fast. With one hand he touched Kylo’s furred head, he scratched him behind the ear which had Kylo close his eyes and turn his head into the touch, a quiet whine escaped him. Maybe Kylo wasn’t so scary after all. He reminded Hux of a pet dog who enjoyed his master’s attention.

“What do you think?” Kylo said. Hux flinched. His voice was warped, almost unrecognizable from his human voice when it came out of his wolf face.

Hux cleared his throat in an attempt to mask his surprise and unconscious attempt of seeing Kylo more as an animal than a human.

“Ah, impressive,” he muttered. His position on the car felt a bit uncomfortable so Hux moved around just a little. A moment earlier he had believed Kylo to be a creature with a beast’s brain when he was fully transformed but it became clear to Hux that he was wrong. Kylo was as intelligent as a werewolf as he was in his human form. He regretted treating him like a dog even if it was only for a moment.

“I really liked this,” Kylo said. He put his head back into Hux’s lap. With a small sigh Hux resumed stroking the soft fur behind Kylo’s large ears. There was something soothing about it, something that let Hux forget about the strange situation he was in. Never in his life could he have imagined being out in the middle of nowhere with a werewolf resting against him. And it felt nice, he couldn’t deny it. Even if it should feel odd touching Kylo like he would pet a dog.

He didn’t know how long they spent out there but suddenly the wind picked up and Hux shivered where he sat on the car. The heat from the motor was long gone and even with Kylo’s fluffy head in his lap Hux felt cold. Kylo moved away so suddenly it startled Hux, especially since he grabbed him to pull him closer and off of the car so he had to stand. Kylo pulled him into his arms where Hux didn’t have a chance but to rest his head against the furred shoulder in front of him.

“Better?” Kylo said.

“Oh, but I’m tired and it’s cold all alone in the car,” Hux whispered into the dark fur. A crazy idea formed in the back of Hux’s head but he didn’t know if Kylo would be up to it. He didn’t know if it was because of the sense of potential danger he felt from Kylo’s big, sharp claws or because Kylo had conditioned him over the past week to react the way he did at the sight of his nude body. And while it scared him, there was no time like the present. He was sure if it was too much he could back out. Kylo wouldn’t dare hurt him intentionally. At least he hoped he didn’t.

“You know, there are other ways to warm me up,” Hux said in the most enticing manner he could manage. At first he thought Kylo might laugh at him but then his big, hot tongue licked at Hux’s neck. A stuttered moan escaped him. It was outright shameless. Hux didn’t care anymore. He buried his hands deeper into Kylo’s fur. It wasn’t like touching a dog at all once he really thought about it. It was still like touching Kylo Ren, but with more hair and taller. Which was also why Hux’s body reacted the way it did.

“You want me to fuck you like this?” Kylo said, then he licked at Hux’s neck again. It was tantalizing.

“Why the hell not?” Hux said. “I had your knot up my ass this past week I can barely tell it’s there anymore.”

Of course it was a lie. Kylo’s knot affected Hux every single time it entered him. And a werewolf cock had to be a lot bigger. The anticipation made him shiver even more. There is a moment when Hux thought Kylo would laugh it off and deny him, but then he growled against Hux’s shoulder.

“Get the blanket from the car,” he said in such a heady way it made Hux’s already painfully hard erection throb inside his pants.

As much as he hated letting go of Kylo, Hux still did so he could grab the blanket from the hood of the car where they both had sat earlier. It wasn’t easy walking with a raging hard-on but Hux still managed and thanks to the light of the full moon he even picked out a spot in the grass which he thought was dry and didn’t have anything nasty like sticks or stones. Of course all of this was done in a haste so when the blanket was finally on the ground Kylo was right on him. Hux was on his back, his hands buried in Kylo’s fur as the big werewolf tongue licked at his face and his neck while Kylo took great care to remove Hux’s clothes. The dumb animal part of Hux’s brain wanted him to rip it all off and take him right there. Kylo was the more reasonable of the both of them despite the heated moment. Hux knew he’d be thankful later but at the moment he loved nothing more than Kylo’s hot tongue on every bit of naked skin he uncovered. Hux didn’t even know where Kylo put his clothes, he found he didn’t care, especially not as Kylo’s tongue made its way over his belly and down to his throbbing cock. Hux writhed where he lay as it enveloped him. But only for a second before it traveled down lower where Kylo licked over Hux’s perineum and his hole. Hux moaned shamelessly, his hands were grabbing helplessly at the blanket beneath him. Kylo’s presence above him was so much, it was exciting yet intimidating – the danger, the sheer size of him. Kylo could crush him if he wanted to, open a vein with the nick of his claw and kill him right there and then. But instead he was the most careful creature in the world as he moved between Hux’s legs, his huge slick cock touched the inside Hux’s thigh. Hux couldn’t resist reaching out to touch it. To his surprise it was still roughly shaped like a human cock but slick and much bigger. He let go of it. Hux shivered slightly as a bead of sweat formed at his temple. The first touch of Kylo’s huge cock at his hole had him hold his breath. First it seemed it couldn’t get in but then with one careful push the head breached Hux. A stuttering breath escaped him. It was big. Even with all the sex he had in the past week it still didn’t prepare him for how big this werewolf cock really was.

“You okay?” Kylo said somewhere against Hux’s hair. His voice was incredibly rough, closer to a growl than actual words.

“I’m good,” Hux manged to say despite his lack of breath. His legs were slightly shaking when Kylo pushed in further and further. There was no end to this long, ridiculous thing he called his cock. At first it was uncomfortable and Hux felt as if Kylo was rearranging his insides but there was a sense of pride in him for taking such a huge thing inside of himself. It made him only harder. And when Kylo moved it felt incredible. His cock was so huge it easily pressed against Hux’s prostate, giving it constant stimulation. A whine escaped him while Kylo grunted over him.

“You feel so good,” Kylo growled into his ear before licking over it, hot and wet. His clawed hands took hold of Hux’s hips and lifted him off the ground easily. Hux gasped in surprise but quickly wrapped his legs around Kylo, or at least he attempted it. Hux couldn’t even talk anymore, he was so overwhelmed by every sensation Kylo made him feel – the absolute size of his cock, his strength with which he held Hux up, the warmth and softness of his fur in contrast to the way he was fucking Hux.

The speed of Kylo’s thrusts never changed and for once Hux was grateful for it, the slow and deep pace allowed him to at least keep what little wits he still had to appreciate what was happening to him. Kylo’s soft fur was a tantalizing touch against Hux’s cock which had been leaking onto his own belly from the moment Kylo entered him.

“I’m about to knot you,” Kylo said, his voice now barely close to human. “If you’ll let me.”

“Do it,” Hux said without thinking.

It expanded inside of Hux slowly at first, then all at once. Hux came so hard he blacked out for a moment.

When he came back to himself he was lying on the blanket with his head in someone’s lap, a hand softly stroked his hair. Hux didn’t need to look up to know it was Kylo. There was a jacket covering him and Hux could tell he was at least wearing his shirt while his lower half was still naked. Meanwhile, Kylo was fully clothed. For a moment he touched Hux’s face to softly stroke his cheek with the back of his hand before it retreated to rest in his hair.

“Do you still hate me?” Kylo whispered. Hux was too tired to argue, too out of it to even try and pretend he hated Kylo. It was no use trying to lie to himself any longer.

“No, I don’t hate you,” Hux said. A question prickled in his mind and he decided to say it since they were already in this very strange situation where it was as if they could talk about anything. All the while Hux felt like he couldn’t move his legs as something wet was pooling between them.

“Did you mean it when you said I was the best thing that ever happened to you?” Hux said.

Kylo chuckled a little.

“Yes, I meant it. You were such a vicious little asshole back when we were young. I loved that about you,” Kylo said, then after a short pause. “I still do.”

They were silent for a while since Hux couldn’t think of a thing to say and Kylo appeared to be content with having his head resting in his lap.

Hux was becoming increasingly aware of his body, especially the ache in his abdomen and his ass. When he moved it actually hurt enough for Hux to hiss through his teeth.

“Did your knot lethally wound me or something?” he said. Kylo chuckled weakly.

“You’re going to be fine. I, uh, panicked slightly when you blacked out and checked,” he said with some hesitation. Hux felt his cheeks warm a little at the thought of Kylo probing his unconscious body.

“You might leak for a little while longer though.”

It sounded like Kylo actually cared and by now Hux believed it. How couldn’t he? Even though he had been nothing but trouble ever since he got back into Hux’s life. And still, he did care.

Coldness was seeping into Hux’s bones from where he lay on the ground with nothing but a thin blanket between him and the grass. He shivered.

“At least warm me up, will you? You’re a werewolf after all,” Hux said with a sniff even though Kylo was currently in his human form. “It’s the least you could do.”

Kylo laughed, which jiggled Hux’s head where it still lay in Kylo’s lap.

“We should get in the car instead,” Kylo said. “We could both be in the back.”

“Not yet,” Hux said even though he wouldn’t mind being anywhere but the cold hard ground. “At least lie down next to me.”

Kylo chuckled again, then he carefully lowered Hux’s head down onto the blanket before moving away so he could stretch out next to him on his side and snuggle against him.

They were silent for a moment, then Hux wiggled around a bit and noticed something that concerned him.

“Did you put our only towel under my ass?” Hux said as pain pulled through his lower half.

“I think it seeped through to the blanket,” Kylo said where he pushed his face against Hux’s neck, then he laughed awkwardly.

Hux sighed. Maybe they needed to buy more towels and blankets for when they camped in the car. Or in general. One could never have to many blankets, he thought as the cold ground bit into his naked feet.

“Well, I guess we need to wash our clothes anyway, might as well throw in the towel and the blanket,” he eventually said.

A soft noise escaped Kylo, he didn’t say anything and Hux found he was fine with it. For the first time in a long time he actually enjoyed Kylo’s presence despite being out in the cold. At least they had each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Additional CW:  
> Ooop, here it is - the werewolf sex! As in Kylo fully transformed. He's 100 % aware of what he's doing and it's consensual.  
> Also a very short allusion to rimming. (Just a short lick over Hux's hole, that's all.)


	6. Chapter 6

It was another day on the road with Hux at the wheel and Kylo napping next to him on the front seat. Usually Kylo wasn’t one to sleep this deeply while Hux was driving. Or at all, since he preferred to either drive or survey their surroundings. There was always something slightly erratic about him when he went to sleep, haunted by the shadows of the past as well as the ones currently pursuing them.

Hux looked over every now and again when driving was slow and they were alone on the road. Sometimes to check if Kylo was sleeping or awake, other times simply to look at him, even if it was only for a second before his eyes were trained back on the road. When he looked this time he found Kylo to be peacefully asleep. Hux hated to admit it but half the time Kylo didn’t even look too bad despite everything. He was still a handsome man. Even with the scar on his face which gave him more character if that was even possible with such an expressive face as his.

The last two weeks had been a blur to Hux. They never stayed in a town for too long, most of the time only to restock their food, to wash their clothes and clean themselves up where they could. And all those times they were under tremendous stress so the wouldn’t be attacked by the wolves following them even when they didn’t even spot any of them. So many of their nights were now spent sleeping in the car, Hux sure longed for a bed. Any bed, really. As long as he could stretch his legs it sounded fine to him. Sleeping in the car was uncomfortable and with the weather getting colder it was also starting to become a risk even while sharing body heat. Hux shuddered at the thought of freezing to death inside the car one night. Or maybe to wake up and find Kylo frozen stiff next to him.

Kylo made a soft sound as he woke up.

“Can you stop somewhere? I need to piss,” he muttered, his voice still heavy with sleep. He didn’t even open his eyes completely yet as he stretched and groaned. It wasn’t much of a stretch since he was tall and the car couldn’t contain the sheer size of him.

“Sure,” Hux said and looked for somewhere to park and successfully located a side street that looked rather secluded. Once he parked the car, Hux got out as well to stretch his legs. It felt rather good to walk a few steps while Kylo went off into the bushes. Hux scratched his beard as he looked around. Shaving at rest stop bathrooms had become so tedious that he mostly gave up on anything but trimming his beard every now and again with some tiny scissors he got from a drugstore weeks ago. By now he wondered if it really mattered if he disguised himself, especially since the brown dye had already washed out and showed his hair in all its ginger glory once more. He was sure the werewolves who pursued them would know him by smell anyway since he was always around Kylo and surely picked up his scent. It was nigh impossible he didn’t.

Hux was leaning against the side of the car when Kylo returned and immediately went to press himself against Hux’s back. His lips felt hot as they touched Hux’s cold ear for a sweet kiss.

“What are you doing?” Hux whispered while he leaned into the touch. Kylo’s chest felt warm against his back, how could not? With the weather getting colder any bit of warmth was welcome. Instead of answering, Kylo’s warm hands were busy stroking over Hux’s clothed belly before dipping lower and worming themselves into his pants.

“You didn’t even clean your hands,” Hux said with an annoyed sigh. But still, he didn’t pull away from the touch. It was nice, despite being out in the open and to his own annoyance his body immediately reacted. He hated to admit it, but he wanted it. He grew addicted to Kylo’s touch weeks ago.

“I didn’t pee on my hands,” Kylo said a chuckle. “I can drive if you want to rest and maybe we can sleep at a motel tonight. If you like.”

His voice was deliciously sultry. The sound made Hux’s skin prickle lightly even if he still felt a little bit disgusted by Kylo’s unwashed hands. He knew when Kylo suggested something like a motel he meant he wanted to fuck in an actual bed. Which was fine enough with Hux. It was much more fun to have sex on an actual mattress with the added benefit of sleeping in it afterwards. In all the weeks they’d been on the run it was all they did – drive, sleep, fuck. And yet Hux found it still better than having two jobs that left him with hurting feet and little to no free time. In a strange way, getting hunted by werewolves might have been the best thing that ever happened to Hux. It was a bizarre thought that occurred to him every once in a while.

Hux sighed softly, he leaned his head back slightly to rest against Kylo’s shoulder.

“Yeah, let’s do that,” he muttered. A gasp escaped him when Kylo took hold of Hux’s rapidly hardening cock with one hand while his other slipped under Hux’s shirt to caress his bare belly only to move up slowly. Kylo kissed his neck before nuzzling his face against him with a soft sound of his own. They still didn’t kiss on the mouth despite growing closer. Hux wouldn’t even mind if he did but Kylo never asked and somehow Hux felt he had to be the one to do it first. Just so Kylo knew it was alright.

“I love that beard,” Kylo whispered hotly against Hux’s ear. A low chuckle escaped Hux, close to a moan.

“You’re just jealous because you can’t grow one,” he said before biting back a sound. Hux couldn’t help but think of Kylo’s lips again, how could he not after feeling them on his jaw and with the memory of how they felt when they stretched around his cock. He really wanted to kiss him but before he could even turn his head, Kylo’s hand sped up. Hux clapped a hand in front of his mouth as he moaned. He hadn’t become completely shameless after all despite letting Kylo touch him like this in public. At least they were shielded by the car.

He came way too quickly in Kylo’s clever hand. Kylo knew him in and out by now, knew his desires, his sensitive spots. He knew exactly how to reach up and twist a nipple to make Hux’s legs go weak, he knew the right a mount of pressure needed to make Hux come quickly or that the hot breath in Hux’s ear made him squirm in his arousal. But as soon as Hux came, Kylo moved away from him without even an attempt at receiving any reciprocation. It startled Hux slightly, even if Kylo moved calmly when he opened one of the back doors of the car to rummage around only to emerge with a wet wipe to clean up his hands. If only he had done so sooner. Hux took a deep breath and rightened his clothes, then got back into the car at the passenger side. His body was still singing from the afterglow of his orgasm as he leaned back and closed his eyes. A nap didn’t sound so bad right now if only his heart would stop pounding so fast. The driver’s door opened, the car shook slightly as Kylo got in and Hux opened one eye to look over with a slight smile on his lips which Kylo mirrored before he started the engine and drove off. Hux drifted off quicker than he expected once he calmed down. It was good Kylo offered to drive them since he might have fallen asleep at the wheel.

The sound of a car door slamming shut woke Hux from his slumber and the smell of greasy, delicious yet terribly unhealthy food permeated the air. It immediately made his stomach growl and maybe a few years ago he would’ve been embarrassed by it. He looked around in confusion and found they were in the parking lot of a fast food restaurant.

“Hey,” Kylo said, a big grin plastered on his face and pushed one paper bag into his hands. It was warm and smelled divine. Compared to the protein bars and stale crackers they ate the last three days this was a massive improvement. Even if Hux’s arteries already quivered in fear of the consequences.

“Thanks,” Hux said quietly but with his mouth already watering. Sure, he used to get nicely cooked food at the diner when on his lunch break but there was just something about a good burger that made him want it even if Hux knew this would give him a heartburn 80 % of the time. The first bite still felt divine, like a lost treasure suddenly recovered.

They ate together in companionable silence for quite a while, at least until Kylo chuckled next to him.

“You seem a lot happier recently,” he said and Hux couldn’t even deny it. Despite everything, he didn’t feel angry, or sad. Even if sleeping in the car made him grumpy sometimes and the immediate danger wasn’t pleasant.

“Ah, you know, it’s nice not to worry about paying my bills or work, even if we’re on the run from a pack of vicious werewolves who try to murder us,” Hux said with a shrug before taking another bite of his burger. For a moment Kylo looked amused but then his smile dropped and he seemed terrified.

“They’re not trying to kill us. They want to punish me by hurting you,” he said.

It was sobering hearing it again. Hux aborted the bite he was about to take as he thought about it for a moment. He put it back down.

“What was it like? It couldn’t have been all that bad if you stayed with them for this long,” Hux eventually said. When Kylo didn’t answer he wondered if he had crossed a line. Instead of apologizing he didn’t say anything.

“Do you remember that time at the diner? When the blonde werewolf came around?” Kylo suddenly said. “It’s like she said, we can be ourselves around other werewolves. We were like some sort of rag-tag family. All of us. Snoke made us feel like we could conquer the world, and we believed it.”

He sounded bitter.

“But the things he made us do, the things he made me do,” Kylo said with a shuddering breath. Hux remembered Kylo was alluding to it in the past, but he never told him any details. Even though Hux felt some morbid curiosity, he knew it wasn’t worth hurting Kylo over it. His imagination was already enough for him to fill in the gruesome details.

“I was his protegee, you see. So he was never satisfied with anything I did. I had to do better than the others, work harder for his approval,” Kylo said. “No matter what I did, it was never enough.” He shook his head slightly, the burger in his hands forgotten. “I don’t know if I could ever tell you...”

Hux stopped eating as he listened. One thing he lived through himself surely was the big expectations placed on him by his own father. He knew what it was like. But then, a question was burning in his mind – if Kylo really killed a person. But he couldn’t ask. He simply couldn’t. It would be too cruel.

A sob tore from Kylo’s throat.

“I don’t even know if my father is even still alive. Snoke wanted me to kill him and my mother. And I tried. I really tried. I struck down my father but after that I left,” he said. “I don’t know if he’s alive or if he died. He’s not a werewolf so maybe I did it, maybe I killed him. Just like that. I can’t go back there, Hux, I just can’t.”

He was a sobbing, sniffling mess.

“And then I dragged you into it too. I’m so fucking sorry,” Kylo said. Hux didn’t know what to say at first, not only because he didn’t know how to deal with Kylo’s outburst of feelings. He didn’t know how to deal with it in general, if Hux was honest to himself. The knowledge of Kylo killing his own father sat like a stone inside of him. Han Solo had been many things, but one of them was definitely a good father. Not like Hux’s father. He had always liked Han back when they were kids. He never gave Hux a stern talking to when he found out they were dating. He was simply a sweet man with an entire collection of wild stories from his youth. A cold feeling spread in his heart.

“I had my own father killed,” Hux quietly said in an attempt to change the subject. Kylo stared at him. At least he stopped sniffling so there was at least that. This wasn’t something Hux had told anyone, ever.

“My father had a mild stroke some years ago but he still needed some assistance. So I hired a caretaker who slowly poisoned him,” Hux said. He recounted quite vividly how he had planned it, how he had hired the woman. She had been discreet and left without a trace after Brendol’s untimely demise. Back then Hux had made it a point not to accept any food or drink when he was at his father’s house in case the woman thought he deserved to be poisoned as well.

“I paid her a lot of money. I really hoped I’d get it back by inheriting my father’s fortune but instead he left most of his money to my step-mother. I nearly bankrupted myself paying to get rid of him,” Hux said with a sigh and a slight shake of his head. “I didn’t even have enough money left for a lawyer to contest the inheritance. I spent it all on having him killed.”

And Hux was glad he did. Brendol was a terrible man who in Hux’s opinion didn’t deserve to live. Back then he had no remorse and he still didn’t have any, instead he only felt relief. Even if it had brought him tumbling down from a good life into poverty. But unlike his father he at least was still alive, which meant in his mind that he won. Hux didn’t even care if Kylo judged him for it, he felt justified in what he did. Maybe Kylo would be disgusted with him, at least for a while. But for now they were bound together. Because Kylo cared enough not to leave him behind.

But then Kylo took his hand into his own and held it, stroking his thumb over the back of Hux’s hand.

“There were others too,” Kylo said. “Other people. Snoke ordered me to kill them and I did. I could’ve run away back then but I didn’t.”

The sullen look on Kylo’s face annoyed Hux. His tears were bad enough and Hux didn’t want to see him like this anymore. Not after bearing his greatest sin to him. He pulled his hand out of Kylo’s only to grab him by the collar of his dirty shirt so he could pull him closer into a rather greasy kiss. It wasn’t a good kiss but when Hux pulled away Kylo didn’t look sad anymore but rather surprised.

“Fuck you and fuck Snoke. And my father too,” Hux said angrily which had Kylo laugh.

“Why me too?” he said.

“Because you’re a stupid asshole,” Hux said, then, with a lot less heat. “But at least you’re my stupid asshole. I love you, you idiot.”

The heat of his own face and the loud beating of his heart made Hux almost turn away but then Kylo dropped his half-eaten burger onto his pants with a curse.

Hux was quick to shove what was left of his burger at Kylo, he looked a bit shaken and like he needed it. He could still feel his own heart in his throat

“Do you want the rest of mine?” he said.

“It’s okay,” Kylo said and picked his fallen burger back up and took another bite. For a moment Hux thought Kylo was unfazed by his confession, but then he realized how giddy he really was, tapping his foot a little where he sat as he chewed on his burger for longer than was necessary. Hux waited for him to finish but Kylo never said anything, instead when he was done eating he did take what was left of Hux’s burger out of his hand and ate it as well.

“Damn, I’m starving,” Kylo said. A thought came to Hux and he couldn’t help but say it.

“So you’re hungry like a wolf?”

Kylo stared at him in surprise before he burst into laughter. It was infectious and Hux couldn’t help but join in.

“I didn’t know you had a sense of humor,” Kylo eventually said when he got himself under control. “Not a great one but still.”

Hux almost frowned. At least he tried. But the sight of Kylo’s happy face did something to him he didn’t think possible. It warmed his cold, shriveled heart.

“I’m going to get more food, you want anything?” Kylo said eventually and after wiping a little tear out of the corner of his eye. His gaze was soft as he looked at Hux, as if he was just shy of making his own confession even though he didn’t have to. Everything he did, every time he talked about his feelings Hux knew that Kylo loved him.

“Get me some nuggets,” Hux said, he could feel his stomach still not being full and he had to take the opportunity to eat something more savory than energy bars.

“Alright,” Kylo said, he hesitated for a second before he leaned over and gave Hux a greasy kiss on his cheek before he left the car. Hux leaned back in his seat with a long breath. At least his heart wasn’t beating so fast anymore.

Several hours later they were in a room at a cheap motel they rented for the night. Hux was currently sitting on the bed where he pulled off his shoes with a relieved sigh. He hadn’t done that in quite a while. It was too cold in the car to be without them so even the thin carpet felt good under the soles of his feet when he put both of them down. He couldn't help but knead the carpet with his toes. What a strange feeling to have ample room for wiggling them again. Next to him Kylo flipped through the channels on their TV where everything seemed to be either infomercials or straight porn. With a huff he turned it off again.

“Well, so much for that,” he said with an annoyed grunt as he scooted back against the headrest. Hux looked over to him.

“At least we can take a shower. We really need it,” he said. When he saw Kylo lying on the bed with his clothes still on he winced a little. Kylo needed it more than him, Hux was sure of it. Or maybe he got too used to his own body odor by now. At least Kylo was polite enough not to tell him despite having a more sensible nose.

“Do you want to go first? Maybe I can find something to watch after all,” Kylo said as he toyed with the remote which he had picked up again even if he didn’t turn the TV back on just now.

“You know, this time I’ll let you go first. I can take a look at our supplies if you like,” Hux said. He didn’t really need the TV, instead he still had a book they bought at a drug store that he wanted to finish. Sure, it wasn’t exactly a good novel but it was still better than the few channels they had, besides, if he left counting their supplies to Kylo they would end up fucking instead. Not that Hux really minded but he also liked having enough to eat while they were on the road since staying too long at one place always posed a risk. He wasn’t at all fond of the frantic shopping experiences in the past weeks.

“Alright,” Kylo said. With a quiet yawn he sat back up but he didn’t leave for the bathroom immediately, at least not without taking a good look at Hux with fondness in his gaze. Hux couldn’t help but look after him until the door closed. There was a thought at the back of his head that pestered him so much that even when he started sorting out their things Hux couldn’t stop thinking about it. So much that while he was lining up protein bars to count them he stopped, swore and made his way to the bathroom.

When Hux tried the door it opened and somehow it didn’t surprise him how Kylo didn’t think to lock it. They had no shame in front of each other, not anymore and Hux was sure Kylo didn’t even have any to begin with as far as it concerned him.

The shower looked to be on the smaller side which was typical for a motel but it didn’t stop Hux from stripping out of his clothes. If Kylo noticed he didn’t inquire on it. He didn’t appear surprised when Hux slipped in.

“Hello there,” Kylo said with a chuckle as Hux pressed against him. They were chest to chest.

“Hey,” Hux said and put his arms around him. Neither of them was getting clean this way but Hux didn’t care for now, not when he pulled Kylo in for a sweet kiss.

Kylo’s hands were on him, stroking down his sides only to settle on his hips like a warm weight. They didn’t go lower, not yet anyway.

“I love you so, so much,” Kylo whispered against his lips once they broke apart only to go for another deep kiss immediately. His lips were so soft, Hux didn’t know how he could ever deny himself the feeling.

At least he smelled a little less now that he was halfway soaped up even if there was still the slight odor of wet dog. Once they broke apart Hux reached around to take up the bottle of shampoo so he could start washing Kylo’s hair. It was a tight fit but somehow he managed to reach up and scrub those inky black curls.

“Did you get bored out there?” Kylo said with a chuckle. He closed his eyes and let Hux work on his hair. He made a soft sound of enjoyment as he leaned forward so Hux could get a better reach.

“I can still count everything before we leave,” Hux said. Kylo’s long hair sure would feel a lot better between his fingers once it was clean so he did his very best. Eventually Kylo took up the soap to wash Hux in return. They spent a couple of minutes in silence, simply washing each other even if it was such a tight fit in the shower that Kylo had trouble turning around when Hux washed his back. For Hux it wasn’t easy to actually focus on washing Kylo as his thoughts were occupied by the idea of squeezing Kylo’s buttocks. He still could do so later. Once he was done he couldn’t deny himself any longer so he leaned in to kiss Kylo’s neck and wrap his arms around him so he could press his chest against Kylo’s broad back.

Kylo chuckled but didn’t say anything and for once Hux was glad. He was well aware cuddling the way he did wasn’t typical behavior for him but he couldn’t help it. What was the point on trying to keep his distance if Kylo constantly invited a comfortable closeness? Especially after his love confession it seemed ridiculous to stay away. Hux sighed against him. He could get used to this. It would be like old times, when they were still in high school and spent every bit of free time glued to each other’s side. It was the only time during his childhood that he knew a friendly touch in his life. He missed it dearly. But now he could have it back.

Eventually the lukewarm water turned cold and Hux fled the shower so he wouldn’t cool out too much. Kylo stayed a moment longer while Hux rubbed himself dry with one of the towels.

“I don’t want your ice toes against my legs, come out already,” Hux said when Kylo just stood there with his eyes closed. He turned the water off with a laugh and got out of the shower. Suddenly the bathroom felt tiny with both of them there.

“I guess you need to warm me up then,” Kylo said, his voice already sultry as he put his wet hands on Hux’s shoulders. They were cold. Hux scoffed and shook them off.

“At least dry yourself off first,” he said and pressed the towel into Kylo’s hand.

“I’m surprised you don’t want to dry me off,” Kylo said with a laugh and even though Hux had the impulse to scoff again he took the second towel they had which he then unceremoniously dropped on top of Kylo’s head before rubbing at his hair.

“Is that what you were thinking about?” Hux said with a slight chuckle. He was getting a little cold but he found he didn’t mind for now even if neither of them put out clothes to wear after the shower. By now he was positive they would end up in bed naked anyway.

Kylo looked at him from underneath the towel with a grin on his face.

“You’re getting goose bumps. I really need to warm you up, hm?” he said and pulled Hux close. Kylo was already warming up despite being in the cold water earlier. Hux pressed his face into Kylo’s neck and breathed in his clean scent. He briefly wondered what it was like for Kylo with his more sensitive nose.

Hux closed his eyes for a second and imagined he could have this every single day of his life, this kind of intimate moment where they simply held each other without a care in the world. But reality settled in very fast in the form of a thought at the back of Hux’s head that didn’t want to go away. He pushed it down for now and pulled slightly away from Kylo, even if the question still burned inside of him.

“Come on, let’s get some clothes and go to bed,” Hux said. Kylo put the towels aside and followed Hux back into the room. It was cold out there and Hux was quick to at least grab a shirt to pull over his head before he got into bed and under the covers. Kylo didn’t even bother with any clothes as he joined him. Kylo’s cold toes rubbed against Hux’s feet instantly and he chuckled when Hux pulled away with an annoyed sound.

“I told you not to put your cold toes on me,” Hux said with a sniff, then he got serious since he could no longer avoid asking the question burning in his mind.

“Kylo, do you think we’ll have to be on the run forever?” he said. Kylo’s smile dropped, his hand came up to cradle Hux’s face as he pressed his forehead against his. It felt nice, even if this was a serious conversation.

“I don’t know what else to do,” Kylo said. “I don’t think it would even be possible to get close enough to Snoke to take him out without any of his people interfering. So I guess for now we can only run until he loses interest. If he ever does.”

Hux knew he couldn’t suggest going to Kylo’s parents. He knew why. With Kylo’s confession still fresh in his mind Hux couldn’t imagine it going over well if they tried going there. No, it wasn’t an option. And on Hux’s side? Well, there was his step-mother who didn’t have much of an interest in him, especially not after inheriting almost all of his father’s money. Not that Hux cared for her either.

Hux sighed.

“Well, I guess we might as well get some sleep since we’re in a real bed for once,” Hux said. Kylo pulled away slowly, his touch lingered as long as it could.

“Yeah, I guess,” he muttered. The defeated expression on his face was hard to look at. Hux didn’t like it as it tore at his heart, so he did the only thing he knew worked and kissed him. He kissed Kylo so deeply he slipped his tongue into his mouth and Kylo let him. He kissed back slowly, pressed his tongue against Hux’s.

His huge hands were warm on Hux’s ribs as they held onto him, only lightly, just so Hux could feel their weight and warmth. It was a comfort Hux had learned to love. Kylo’s presence was so big at times, it seemed to enveloped him. And Hux thought he liked it very much.

Kylo pulled back slightly to lick at Hux’s lips before he whispered, “I want you to make love to me.”

Kylo’s eyes were so big and his expression so soft, Hux felt a bit bad about the last time he fucked him. It was back at the room they had rented, with Kylo’s face awkwardly pressed against the window he kept staring out of when he surveyed the street. He didn’t seem to mind back then. This time it would be different. Hux wanted to treat him right, like he deserved. He wanted it. He wanted to make ‘love’ to Kylo, to let him feel how much Hux felt for him.

"Hang on,” Hux said and pulled away for a moment to discard the shirt he had pulled over his head earlier, then he reached for one of the bags on the floor. The bed under them creaked and when Hux turned back to Kylo with lube and condoms in hand he found him turned around, propped up on the bed on his arms and knees. Hux sighed, this wouldn’t do. In this position he had less options to please Kylo than when he was on his back. Besides, this time he wanted to see every single one of his reactions.

"I want to see you," he said with a careful touch to Kylo's bare shoulder after Hux deposited both the lube and the condoms on the bed. Wordlessly Kylo turned around so he was lying on his back. His eyes looked watery, full of emotion, his chin quivered slightly. It affected Hux deeply to see him like this, so affected by Hux’s wish to be good to him. Kylo was a beautiful man and Hux felt something close to joy at the thought of being the one allowed to touch him like this. At the same time he felt ashamed for how he treated him in the past, even if it felt completely reasonable at the time. Now he knew better. The chains of his own bitterness didn’t hold him any longer.

Hux situated himself between Kylo’s legs and moved forward so he could kiss him. His crotch rubbed against Kylo’s, both of them bare against each other. Hux didn’t suppress a groan, he wasn’t sure he even could while Kylo moaned freely. He was already impossibly hard while Hux’s own cock was slowly rising.

A whine tore from Kylo’s lips as he stopped kissing him, his deep brown eyes were still shiny as he looked up to Hux. A part of Hux wanted to tell Kylo how amazing he was, how beautiful, but it wasn’t like him and the words wouldn’t form in his mouth even though they were in his mind, so he said nothing, he took another moment to look at him before he finally took up the lube, too scared he might say something stupid. He fumbled with it for a moment as he squirted some onto his fingers. Kylo’s eyes were still on him, big and round, almost completely black from how big his pupils were.

Hux escaped them by kissing his neck as his fingers rubbed over the tight furl of Kylo’s hole. One stuttered breath from Kylo later and Hux could slip one in easily. Hux wanted it to be nice for him, so he kissed down Kylo’s chest as he carefully fingered him, completely ignoring his own needs and his own hard cock. He kissed Kylo’s chest, his trembling pecs, then one of his nipples before he moved down further to dip his tongue into Kylo’s navel which had his back arch with a quiet moan. Hux chuckled against Kylo’s belly, a cheeky grin on his lips as he looked up to him. He was so beautiful as he writhed and pressed against Hux’s finger which wasn’t even on his prostate just yet.

With a few more inquiring touches here and there he had it. Kylo’s body went rigid for a second before he relaxed, he rocked against the pressure of Hux’s finger in tiny increments, back and forth. It was beautiful. Hux could only watch in awe for the mere second he took the time to observe him. Kylo whined when Hux pulled it out but only for a moment so he could reapply more lube and put two in at once. He was quick to find Kylo’s sweet, sweet little nub again. With his fingers back against Kylo’s prostate, Hux continued his journey downwards towards his cock which was already hard and leaking against Kylo’s stomach. Hux could relate, he wasn’t off much better but this was about treating Kylo right. He gave it a slow lick with the flat of his tongue, up the shaft and over the glans. Kylo bucked against him and his fingers, his noises shameless. Hux put a hand on his hip, even if he was physically unable to stop Kylo, he at least settled down at the touch.

“Please, please, please,” Kylo whispered as he continued to fist the sheets so tightly Hux thought they might rip. But Hux’s tongue didn’t stay on Kylo’s cock, instead it moved down to his balls. He mouthed at the smooth skin, every little gasp and moan made him only work harder as he pressed his own lips against first one, then the other. The smell of Kylo’s personal musk was in his nose but it was mixed with the clean smell of soap. Hux found he actually enjoyed this.

It wasn’t until Hux sucked at one of Kylo’s heavy balls while pressing his thumb idly against his perineum that Kylo groaned in frustration. Hux just knew Kylo was close to breaking. By now he had learned more about his body that he ever thought possible and it became easy for him to tell.

“I can’t take it anymore,” he said, his words desperate. “I need you in me. Now, Hux. I need you.”

A while ago Hux would’ve been haughty to have Kylo Ren at his mercy, now he was delighted in how much Kylo wanted him. So much that he begged Hux to fuck him.

Hux’s erection throbbed painfully as he slowly pulled away from Kylo, including his fingers which previously massaged Kylo’s prostate to take in the mess he already made of the man, his quivering chest, his red face, the way his cock had already leaked a puddle onto his belly. That such a big man could look so vulnerable fascinated Hux to no end and it made him want Kylo even more to know he was the cause of it. But he didn’t have the time to admire Kylo for too long, instead he reached for the condoms and ripped one open. It didn’t matter that Kylo could see how hastily Hux pushed it over his own erection or how his hand quickly stroked down to spread the lube. Even though Kylo had been inside of him bare as a werewolf, Hux still liked to avoid messy clean-ups and Kylo didn’t complain either, instead he splayed his legs as far apart as he could, inviting Hux into himself. His hole quivered visibly in anticipation when Hux brought himself in position with one last look down before he took a hold of his cock and guided it in. He watched Kylo as he did, a tiny gasp fell from his lips as the head slipped in and Hux bit his bottom lip to keep himself from coming right there and then. Kylo was so tight and hot around him. He was perfect. Hux’s breath caught as he pressed inside fully. He needed a moment so he stopped moving entirely. The last time he got to feel this it was such a frantic action, somewhere between anger and lust but this was different. His feelings had changed for Kylo. Or maybe they had always been the same and he only now realized he felt them at all. He wanted to make this good for the both of them.

Kylo stretched out his arms to beckon him close and Hux went willingly, he leaned over him, his dick rocked inside of Kylo as Hux leaned into the kiss with a low groan. Kylo’s mouth was hot and his tongue insistent on being in Hux’s mouth and he let him in without resistance, all the while Hux moved his hips ever so slightly. He didn’t go hard, he didn’t have to. Kylo was already clenching up so much around him, close to the edge. Hux pulled out of the kiss just enough to take in Kylo’s flushed face. Some huffed proclamation of love almost escaped him, high on the feeling of connection he shared with Kylo but it was still terribly hard for Hux to let it go, to blurt it out like a babbling fool. Instead he buried his face against Kylo’s neck, his teeth biting down slightly on the meat of his shoulder to stifle his own noises, his little cries as he sped up his thrusts. Kylo’s legs came up to wrap around him. His strong hands pressed against Hux’s back. The bed creaked heavily under him as Kylo moved with every single one of Hux’s thrusts, his strong body easily rocked the furniture as they moved in perfect unison, like a duet of two bodies. It put into perspective how much stronger he was than Hux but at the same time it turned Hux on even more to know how much power he had over this man who could so easily hurt him yet chose not to.

The next clench of Kylo’s ass pulled him over the edge and Hux found himself reflexively biting down on Kylo’s shoulder as he came deep inside of him. Kylo gave a shout at the feeling of Hux’s teeth digging into his flesh but he didn’t try to push him away. There was a sudden wetness between them and Hux knew Kylo came as well.

“Sorry,” Hux muttered as he pulled back and found he had bitten Kylo hard enough to actually draw blood. He could slightly taste it in his mouth, metallic and salty. The last time Hux had blood in his mouth it had been his own. A slight shiver ran down his spine at the memory before he pushed it away in favor of staying in the present.

“It’s okay,” Kylo whispered as Hux slowly pulled out and dropped next to him on the bed but without letting go of him, at least for now. Kylo’s hand stroked his back as Hux buried his face into the crook of his neck where he apologetically licked over the wound he caused. Knowing Kylo it would be gone in no time.

“Just remember not to bite too hard next time. Werewolf blood can turn you if you ingest too much of it,” Kylo said with a low, humorless chuckle. Hux immediately stopped licking at the wound, the metallic taste still in his mouth. The thought of becoming a werewolf didn’t appeal to Hux even though he knew how powerful Kylo was, how his wounds healed faster than those of an average person. And still, the thought of transforming against his will, of becoming even more of a monster than he already was scared him. Or at least he felt like a monster on his own accord. He sniffed slightly, the taste of blood made him anxious. Hux pulled back slowly, he vaguely remembered there being a soda machine somewhere in the downstairs area.

“I think I’ll get myself a cold drink. Do you want anything?” he said as he slowly sat up. Kylo gave him a slightly worried look but didn’t comment on Hux’s sudden urge to leave.

“Nah, I’m good,” he said and leaned back on the bed. Kylo was quite the sight, still a bit red and sweaty with a slowly drying puddle of come on his belly and yet the way he lay on the bed with his arms crossed behind his head made him look like a king. Hux hated to leave him but he craved some fresh air and a cool drink to get the taste of blood out of his mouth. Under Kylo’s watchful eye, Hux lumbered back into the bathroom to dispose of the condom, clean himself off only to return so he could slip on just enough clothes so he wouldn’t freeze when he went outside. After all, this was a motel. The hallway was outside the building. Hux didn’t even zip up his jacket though as he stepped into his unlaced boots after he put some loose change into his pocket.

“You sure you don’t want anything?” he said with the hand already at the door handle. Kylo yawned at him.

“Go get your soda, I’ll clean up in the meantime,” Kylo said with a chuckle. Hux smiled fondly at him, then he was out of the door.

He immediately had to hug his open jacket to himself as it was colder than he thought but the journey downstairs wasn’t so long and soon and he didn’t meet anything on the way to the humming vending machine. There were enough coins in his pocket to get a second can of soda and with a smile Hux decided to get Kylo something anyway. For now he got himself a cold can, the sound of it hitting the pickup box hard felt loud on the empty outside area. Hux bent down and took it, the can almost painfully cold in his hand. The sound when he opened it prickled his ears and the first long sip washed away any hint of blood in his mouth. Relief flooded him. He took a deep breath as he stood there in the light of the hallway lamps, his gaze back on the vending machine, trying to remember which of these drinks Kylo liked, if he even liked any of them at all. The can in his hand was so cold he switched it around. The coins made a light sound as they bounced against each other in Hux’s pocket. He grabbed them firmly.

Then, suddenly out of nowhere an intense pain exploded in his side and traveled through his entire body, making his muscles rigid. Hux couldn’t even think to scream as a gag was shoved in his open mouth and a bag over his head. His legs gave out under him but strong arms caught him. Hux couldn’t struggle even though he wanted to. Everything happened so quickly. They dragged him across what he thought could only be the parking lot, then tossed him into a car where they sat him up between two people. None of them said a word, he didn’t even know how many of them there were. A part of him wanted to succumb to unconsciousness, but a stronger part of him tried to pay attention as the car drove out of the parking lot so he could count all the turns it took to wherever they were going. But it was futile, eventually Hux’s awareness slipped and he was out cold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh well, so that happened....
> 
> Btw, if you like this story please consider leaving a comment. <3 <3   
> It means the world to me to hear about your thoughts!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please take another look at the tags, thank you.

Hux’s face was numb from the cold floor as he slowly came back to himself. His body felt as if all of his muscles were sore at the same time. It was a curious yet uncomfortable sensation. His neck wasn’t thrilled either. There was a thin blanket draped over him and his arms were awkwardly contorted behind his back where they were bound together by a thick rope. Low light filtered through his eyelids. He couldn’t tell if it was artificial or daylight.

It took him a moment to piece together what had happened or at least his theory since his memory was a little bit fuzzy on the details. Someone had tased him outside of the motel, shoved him into a car and then afterwards dumped him in here. The last part he actually didn’t have any recollection of but it made sense with how he found himself on the cold ground. At least the gag was gone but Hux suspected there was a reason for it, mainly that no one would hear him shout for help even if he tried, otherwise they wouldn’t have bothered removing it. He didn’t open his eyes just yet but he could hear people talking and moving around. Even if he tried straining his ears he couldn’t make out enough words to know what the strangers who kidnapped him were talking about. The few words he caught didn’t make up enough for a conversation to follow. There was no doubt in his mind that it were the werewolves who had been following them. Especially since he could hear the name ‘Snoke’ and ‘alpha’ a couple of times. Also, the smell of wet dog was lodged in his nose. Hux’s heart was thundering in his ears which also didn’t help with him listening in on conversations, his stomach clenched at the thought of his own stupidity. He shouldn’t have left the motel room just for some stupid soda. He could’ve just washed the taste of blood out of his mouth with water. He didn’t even know if Kylo was alright or where he was, if he was here too or still at the motel. A shuddering breath escaped him despite his best attempt at lying perfectly still. His body wanted nothing more than to shiver. The blanket on top of him was so thin it couldn’t compete with the cold seeping into his bones from the rough concrete he lay on. It was like lying on a slab of ice.

Hux’s breath caught when he heard someone shuffling closer, the voices became more audible, even above his thundering heart. They had to be really close.

“So that’s him?” a man said with undisguised disgust in his voice, “The human Kylo chose over us, his family? It’s already bad enough he went against the alpha but now this?”

Hux almost flinched when he heard the guy spit. It didn’t land on him or maybe at least he didn’t feel it but it was such a sudden and rude noise that it startled him.

“Pathetic,” he other hissed, then added, “Do you think he’ll survive the bite? Looks a bit puny.”

“Snoke is strong and this human is weak. I bet he’ll die. Wouldn’t be the first one,” the first man said and laughed in a rather spiteful manner. Hux shivered slightly at the threat of his own demise. The assessment of him being weak wasn’t anything he hadn’t heard before. If anything it gave him an advantage since they clearly underestimated him.

He tried so hard not to move that he felt his legs tense up which only made his joints hurt. Hoping they’d talk some more he made sure to keep extra still and keep his breath even. Maybe they’d say something Hux could use, something that would help him get out of this situation, out of whatever place they locked him up in. He could only wait and listen. Eventually he’d have to take a look around but it might help to try and overhear something they might say when they thought he couldn’t hear it.

But then there was a lot more shuffling and growling, Hux almost gasped when he heard what he knew to be Kylo’s voice among the growls and shouting. His heart was beating fast again. Kylo was here. Hux knew this couldn’t be good.

“Where is he?” Kylo shouted loud enough for Hux to hear. Some of the noises he could clearly identify as fighting. Hux tried to look through his eyelashes but didn’t really see anything but legs from his position on the ground. It looked as if he was fenced in with flat metal bars, probably in a type of disused storage unit. The dimensions of his cell he didn’t know yet but it couldn’t be big, he didn’t imagine they would give him much room.

“You better settle down if you don’t want your precious little human to get hurt,” someone close to Hux said, and yet they were clearly still outside his improvised jail cell. It was a woman’s voice. More growling and cursing could be heard and a dragging noise. This time Hux blinked his eyes open and took a proper look at the situation. They had dragged Kylo close, but not close enough for a touch. Not that Hux felt like he could even get himself into a better position as he tried rolling onto his side. His muscles protested when he tried to get his legs under himself but eventually he managed to sit up. It was difficult but at least his face wasn’t against the cold ground anymore.

“Kylo,” he whispered, his voice slightly croaky probably from being in the cold for so long.

“Let him go, he doesn’t have anything to do with this. It’s me you want, not him,” Kylo said. He looked a little roughed up, a man on either side of him held him back by grabbing his arms so he couldn’t come any closer. Not that this was enough to stop Kylo Ren if he used his full strength but the real reason that held him back was the fact that Hux was still bound and out of reach for him.

“You know what Snoke said, to bring you both back. We do what the alpha says,” someone said. Then, Hux could hear a suspicious clicking noise and as he looked to the other side of his ‘cage’ he saw the woman who he suspected had spoken earlier pointing a gun at him through the slats. Was this how he would die? With his body on the cold, dirty ground surrounded by werewolves? With Kylo watching? The only agony worse than dying in such dire circumstances would be knowing how it would break Kylo’s spirit to see it.

“Snoke only said alive, not in one piece,” the woman said with a devious smile.

Kylo stopped straining to get away from them. The knowledge of being a burden settled like a stone in Hux’s stomach. Without him there, Kylo could fight himself out of this situation, run away from the pack again. But with Hux sitting in a cell with his hands bound, vulnerable since he was only human, Kylo couldn’t rescue himself. He couldn’t do anything. Hux couldn’t even tell him to leave as he knew Kylo would never abandon him. It was his greatest fault and Snoke expertly used it against him.

One of the werewolves who held Kylo back scoffed.

“He doesn’t have anything to do with it? Please. When you drag people into your business they become part of the pack’s business. That’s how it’s always been,” he said, then with disgust in his voice he added, “And even worse, everyone can tell what you did with him. You two smell like each other. You could’ve given us the common courtesy of turning him first.”

Kylo growled at him but didn’t say anything. It shouldn’t have surprised Hux that werewolves thought him lesser for being human but it sure did that they seemed to generally didn’t think a human lover could suffice as if transforming into a monstrous beast was a requirement to have good skills in the bedroom. Even if he had to agree Kylo’s knot felt pretty damn good. But he couldn’t argue with them, he didn’t even dare talk in case the woman with the gun were to shoot at him, probably at his leg or his arm to hurt but not to kill. Of course Hux’s preference was to not get shot at all, neither in his arm or leg or anywhere else for that matter so he kept his mouth shut even though the thought of being seen as lesser to these people who followed some old man they could probably easily kill made Hux more than angry. But for now he had to play along, wait for a chance to get out of here if there was any. At least he wouldn’t have to worry about Kylo since he could take care of himself unlike Hux.

“Enough of this,” the woman with the gun said. “Take him away, it’s already bad enough we have one human stink up the place and I can’t stand looking at his face right now. Fucking traitor.” She also spit on the floor.

Kylo went with them with a growl but not a word and even through the metal slats Hux could see how much he wanted to stay and fight. Instead he turned away and left with them, back into the dark.

Except for a light right above him there wasn’t any to be had and something told Hux they wouldn’t turn it off to give him a chance to get used to the dark surroundings of this place he was in to actually see beyond the space outside his improvised cage. This also didn’t give him much of a chance to rest.

Hux flinched when the woman with the gun scraped the barrel against the metal slats before moving away. He could still hear them talking and moving in the dark even if he could barely make out the words any longer. It was frustrating since he didn’t know how closely they were watching him. Could he risk looking around his enclosure to maybe find something to cut the rope on has hands with? They had bound his arms in such a position that he couldn’t even try and loop his legs through to get his hands to his front. There probably wasn’t a chance to find anything, not since there was always the danger of getting incapacitated by a bullet to the leg or the arm. After a sweeping glance he didn’t see anything. They had cleaned the floor so perfectly there was nothing he could use.

With a quiet sigh Hux settled down against the only wall there was even if it was cold. If only he could at least adjust the thin blanket which was barely covering him anymore. At least it was still over his legs even if it didn’t help much against the freezing cold.

He had dozed off slightly despite his thoughts running in circles on possible solutions to his predicament when the door suddenly opened and snapped Hux out of it. He lifted his head and watched apprehensively as a stranger with a steaming bowl entered the cell. Only when the smell hit him did Hux realize how hungry he was. It didn’t even smell like good soup but at least it was food. The man scoffed as Hux’s stomach growled loudly in response to the vague promise of something to eat. He didn’t even know if it would be good or filling.

“You better not try and bite me when I feed you. It’s already bad enough I got saddled with this shit job,” the man said. He looked rough, his face full of scars, his dark hair haphazardly cut into some sort of short style and on top of that he looked incredibly bulky, as if he could crush Hux if it just so pleased him. Of course Hux didn’t want to try anything, he wasn’t an idiot.

“You could untie my hands,” Hux offered, his voice still raspy from disuse and lack of anything to drink for who knew how many hours. If he didn’t get anything soon he might just swallow his tongue and choke, or at least he thought he might.

“Quiet. I’m not here for a conversation,” the man said. He unceremoniously let himself drop down to the ground which unfortunately spilled some of the precious soup. Not that the guy seemed to care. Feeding Hux less would obviously get this over with faster.

“Now, the sooner we get this over with, the better,” he said as he filled the first spoon with broth and then moved it towards Hux’s face. It felt humiliating to let himself be fed by a stranger but Hux had little choice than to accept the spoon. He hated to admit it but it was good enough to eat. It was some sort of chicken broth, nothing special, the kind you bought at the store. The type Hux only knew from when he was sick as a child that their maid cooked up for him since his step-mother couldn’t be bothered and she wasn’t exactly a cook. And he was sick a lot as a child, to his father’s great disappointment.

“Should’ve fed you like a dog out of a bowl but the boss said something about dignity,” the werewolf and added a disapproving snort to underline how displeased he was. “Not that it matters much since you’ll probably die anyway. Puny little thing like you couldn’t even survive the bite in the best of circumstances.”

Of course Hux wanted to argue that they were underestimating him, that he survived a lot of things in his life and it angered him that he couldn’t say a word. Not if he wanted to keep his advantage. He tried to keep his anger boiling below the surface so this man wouldn’t know, wouldn’t try and poke a stick into the hornet’s nest. Hux had a lot of practice keeping himself in check, he simply never thought he’d have to use his abilities in a life-and-death type of situation.

“Hell, maybe it would be better that way,” the man said. “At least Kylo would come to his senses. You know, Snoke thinks he’s the best of us.” Then, with a humorless laugh he added, “How could he be the best and fall for a human. Ridiculous. But well, with him at the bottom of the ranks I might just get to be Snoke’s new favorite instead.”

Hux’s lip quivered slightly. Of course. Without him here, Kylo would be free to leave. Sure, he didn’t want to die but logically thinking his death would give the person he loved his freedom. He wanted to shake his head. He couldn’t seriously be thinking that and he wouldn’t give this werewolf with the soup the satisfaction of knowing any of his thoughts or considerations about his own untimely death. So instead of reacting he continued to slurp the offered soup until it was gone. Some of it dropped on his shirt but since the liquid was only lukewarm it didn’t burn him. But it also didn’t warm him and Hux already knew it would become uncomfortable once it cooled out completely.

“Fucking finally,” the werewolf said when the plate was empty, he got to his feet and left, closing the door behind him with such force that metal loudly hit against metal. Hux slumped against the wall again. It was rough concrete and he wondered if rubbing the rope that bound his hands against it might weaken the fibers so he could break free. But it would be too audible for those sensitive werewolf ears, Hux was sure of it. Besides, even if it did anything to the fibers, with how thick the rope felt he was sure it would take too long. No, he had to be smarter about this. There had to be something better he could use to get free.

And with food finally in his belly he at least had some lead on something he could try. Despite Hux’s muscles protesting he managed to stretch one leg out and beat it against the walls of his ‘cage’.

“Hey, is someone there?” he said, uncertain how close any of these werewolves approximately were to him. Even though he could still hear them moving around and talking outside the area his light source illuminated he didn’t know how much time they truly spent on watching him. Sure, they thought their alpha’s bite would kill him, but did they also think he was overall not clever enough to escape if he really put his mind to it? Did they watch him like they would watch one of their own? Or did someone only occasionally come by to see if he was still alive?

Hux was surprised when it took about a minute or two for any of them to get fed up with the racket he created.

“Shut up and stop that or I’ll bite off that foot!” It was a woman this time, not the same one who had threatened him with the gun. Still, her words were accompanied by a low growl. Hux had no doubt she would make true on her threat if he kept banging the bars so he stopped.

“Please, I need to use the bathroom,” Hux said and did his best to sound desperate, even though he actually didn’t need to go at the moment and he was glad for it. The thought of being even more vulnerable in front of these people made him highly uncomfortable.

“Alright, alright, I’ll get you a bucket,” the woman said and shuffled away, cursing under her breath until she was out of earshot. This wasn’t what Hux wanted. He thought they’d at least take him out of the cell and to a bathroom but maybe he could do something with a bucket. He wondered briefly if Kylo was safe. If they could get out of here, somehow. But then she was back, sooner than Hux had anticipated. Judging from what little sound the entire process of unlocking the door made now that Hux paid attention to it he guessed there was only a singular key to be had for this particular lock, at least if the door to his cell even had a key and not a padlock. Maybe it was even a number padlock, it was hard to know from the sound alone. Not that this information helped him much since even if he could get to it, the chance of being observed at all times was too great. And if it had numbers he wouldn’t know the code.

“There you go,” she said and made to leave but Hux quickly struggled to try and get up and stop her. He almost stumbled and fell over.

“Hey, wait up!” he said, “My hands are behind my back, how am I supposed to use this? I can’t even get my pants off.”

She looked him up and down, her nostrils flared slightly as she observed him, her entire demeanor signaling disgust, then she cursed.

“Fine. I’ll bind your hands in the front. But no funny business,” she said and approached him. Hux kept perfectly still as she removed the rope from his hands, a quiet sigh escaped him when it was gone, if only for a moment. He pulled his hands in front of him, rotated his wrists which cracked, then his shoulders. Everything was still terribly sore and his wrists ached from where the rope had chafed him but at least there was no blood even if it hurt. The werewolf woman cleared her throat and Hux obediently held out his hands so she could bind them in front of him. There was no use fighting her, Hux knew he stood no chance against someone like her or anyone here for that matter, not when she was watching him closely and he had no weapons.

“There. Now don’t bother me again,” she said after Hux’s hands were bound tightly together. She hadn’t been delicate about it and it felt as if the ropes were on even tighter than before and cutting into his skin. Hux wondered if she was the only one watching him or maybe if she only came to look what he was up to because the noise had annoyed her. He waited and watched as she left his cell and closed the door, the clicking of the lock audible. Then he took a look at the bucket. Nothing unusual there but it did have a metal handle. No sharp edges anywhere though and Hux knew attempting to take the handle off couldn’t be done covertly, at least not for him and his limited movement when it came to his hands. But at least he had his hands in front of him now which meant he could actually get some use out of the blanket.

Hux contemplated what else he might be able to do with the bucket. Maybe he could use the blanket as a tool for modesty while he worked on getting the handle off? But it might still be too loud. At least he had a reliable tool to conceal his movements now that he could actually get a hold of the blanket. With his hands behind his back it would’ve been much harder and frankly close to impossible to even drape the thing over himself in a way that was effective for anything he might have thought to do. He picked it up for now and then pondered on an actual plan on how to use this combination of tools he had suddenly acquired. If only he had anything with a sharp edge.

Hux stepped close to the bucket and draped the blanket over it and himself to at least feign that he was trying to relieve himself. Instead of pushing down his pants he squatted a little to try and see if he could rub the ropes on his hand somewhere on the bucket but instead of achieving anything meaningful he almost knocked it over. The edges were perfectly smooth. Hux tried a couple of times but ultimately gave up and moved away from the bucket to sit against the wall again, this time with the blanket draped over him. Sure, he could’ve tried peeing on his hands to try and loosen the knots in an attempt to slip the rope off but this felt like a last resort option in case they decided to lock him up for an indefinite amount of time. For now he could only try and see if there was anything else he could do.

“Is anyone there?” Hux said, this time he didn’t shout to make himself noticed and neither did he bang his leg against the bars. Maybe one of these wolves was curious enough to talk to him. But even after five minutes of waiting there was no answer even though there were still people present around his little cell. He could tell by how close their movement was and when he peered out between the bars he could at least see their shadows. They didn’t want to talk to him. He even pressed his face against the bars but he couldn’t see anything but dark shapes moving. Eventually he settled back down to think. The option of pissing on his own hands to slip through the rope became more and more appealing by the minute. But then what? He didn’t have any means to open the lock, let alone get out of here without being caught immediately. No, he could only sit tight and wait for his chance. They couldn’t keep him in here forever, right?

The door suddenly swung open and Hux quickly got to his feet and backed away against the wall when more than one werewolf came into the cell, both of them as rough-looking as the other ones he had seen so far, both of them strangers he hadn’t encountered yet. Hux said nothing as he stood there and held tightly onto the blanket in his bound hands. He had grabbed it on reflex even though it didn’t do anything to protect him from whatever these two had in mind for him. Hux put on a brave face, they didn’t need to know how scared he really was, partly for himself but mostly for Kylo.

“You’re coming with us, don’t try anything stupid,” one them said and reached for Hux who instinctively evaded his touch thanks to a long-honed reflex. It only earned him an angry growl as the man bullied his way further into the cell. Somehow they really thought he could try anything while at the same time telling him he was weak. It felt unnerving. As if they knew he was up to something. They had to at least expect it.

“What did I just say?” the same guy said, backed Hux into a corner and successfully grabbed his arm. Hux struggled to follow as he was dragged out of the cell, the other werewolf took hold of his other arm, forcing him to drop the blanket. They walked him out there too fast for his sore legs to keep up without struggling.

“Where are you taking me?” he said as he tried to take in his surroundings but the light in his cell had made it impossible for him to get used to the dark which persisted in the rest of this place, whatever it was. There was no answer from either of the wolves who dragged him away and Hux didn’t think they would say anything even if he asked twice or even three times so he kept his mouth shut for now and instead observed his surroundings, or at least he tried to. At this point he didn’t even try and drag his feet, he simply went with them even if he still had trouble keeping up. At least their hard grip on his arms would keep him from falling in case he stumbled. He could see people milling around but didn’t see any of their faces clearly. This appeared to be a very old storage facility as he suspected, with many of those little ‘cells’ like the one Hux had been locked into. Around them the other werewolves appeared to also move into the same direction as the three of them, or at least it was Hux’s impression. After traversing a long hall with many of those small storage cells, Hux was dragged into a separate room with better lighting. There were already a lot of people there, either sitting on the concrete floor or standing at the back of the room. There was a buzz of them talking which only got louder once they laid their eyes on Hux. From the sound of their voices alone he could feel their contempt for him. All of these people were werewolves, Hux had no doubt about it especially since the smell of wet dog in this room became almost overwhelming. And they could tear him apart until there wasn’t even one tiny speck of blood left of him if only they wanted to. It was terrifying to know but at the same time he knew this wasn’t the fate the group had in mind for him. No, their boss had other plans for Hux and it scared him.

The group of werewolves got a lot louder but Hux’s heartbeat was so unnaturally loud in his ears he could hardly hear the jeering and goading from the crowd as he was dragged forward towards a terribly disfigured old man who sat in an armchair. It felt so off, so weird to see a prestigious piece of furniture in a place like this while nobody else had anything to sit on but the hard unyielding floor below them. Hux had no doubt the old man had to be Snoke, the alpha of the werewolf pack and the one who would seal his fate. He didn’t look very impressive, if anything he looked fragile and weak, the polar opposite of how the werewolves had talked about Snoke. Hux couldn’t recall if Kylo had ever described Snoke to him, apart from how he was sure he was stronger than the old man. Meanwhile, the werewolves here had called Snoke strong. It barely made sense to him.

Hux desperately tried to turn his head and look for Kylo but his own gaze was so wild, he couldn’t see him anywhere in the crowd.

Snoke stood to greet them, his arms stretched out as the wolves dragged Hux in front of him where they threw him to the ground. Hux’s knees hit the hard concrete painfully but somehow he still managed to bite back a pained sound. He wouldn’t give them the satisfaction. The noise behind him grew even louder and for a second he thought Snoke might allow them to tear him apart.

“Silence,” Snoke said. He didn’t even have to shout it over the crowd, the werewolves immediately settled down and listened to what he had to say. Snoke looked down at Hux, an eerie expression on his face and even though Hux was nervous, he tried not to react which was hard given the circumstances. Even Snoke’s presence alone felt oppressive despite his fragile appearance. There was a nod from him, then a snap of his fingers.

“Take off the ropes, we’re all civilized people here,” Snoke said with a smile that chilled Hux to the bone. Especially since he knew nothing about Snoke was civilized. Nothing at all even if he pretended as if this was anything than using Hux as a sacrificial lamb. The way he treated those beneath him was evidence enough. Snoke had a throne, the others had nothing.

One of the men who had dragged him there approached him with a pocked knife which almost had Hux flinch but he caught himself in time. The man sawed through the bindings around Hux’s hands, but not without nicking his skin. The smell of blood riled the crowd up again, there were murmurs around them but one sweeping gaze of Snoke across the crowd quieted them easily. Hux hissed quietly at the pain but otherwise swallowed any other reaction. He wouldn’t give it to them, even the hiss that escaped him he regretted. They didn’t deserve to hear it.

Snoke audibly sniffed, possibly to smell his blood before a low chuckle escaped him, his gaze murderous.

“So you’re the one who snatched my top apprentice’s attention away,” he said in a sickeningly sweet voice as he moved closer. Hux didn’t shy away even though his stomach felt queasy and he wanted to do nothing more than to get up and off his knees and run but he knew there were so many werewolves in this room he wouldn’t get far. Somehow this man made his fight-or-flight instinct steer more towards flight than fight which wasn’t good at all.

Snoke stared at him, stared into his eyes and it was as if he tried to steal Hux’s very soul but then he turned away with a laugh to address the others. Hux almost flinched at the sudden movement.

“A pretty little thing! This one I’ll keep close!” he said, some of the wolves in the room laughed. Hux’s stomach lurched. He didn’t want anything to do with Snoke, especially if it involved what he was implying, namely to be a tool to control Kylo.

“Now,” Snoke said and made a gesture with one hand, beckoning someone behind Hux closer. He could hear shuffling and growling and suddenly Kylo was in the corner of his eye and Hux couldn’t help but look over to him. He was held in place by multiple people, he was a bit dirty and looked roughed up as if they had been hitting him not long ago. Their eyes met and Kylo’s expression softened the tiniest bit. Seeing him fueled a fire in Hux’s belly that he didn’t know was still in there. He had one chance to at least free Kylo, and one chance only but he didn’t know if he had the strength to do it.

“This is what happens to those who prefer humans over their own kind,” Snoke said with a wide gesture at the crowd from where he stood in front of Hux, not paying him any mind.

“It gets you to the bottom of the pack. You had everything, son. And you threw it all away,” he said with a click of his tongue. “For a human. A species that is below us. But soon I will correct your error. One way or another.”

There was jeering from the crowd, but also laughing, too many noises for Hux to even decipher them all properly. This was his chance, the only one he had.

Hux got to his feet quickly and lunged at Snoke, he knocked him over so they were both on the concrete floor with Hux on top. Before Snoke could even react Hux sank his teeth into his throat where he thought his pulse point had to be.

_Don’t think too much._

_**Don’t think too much.** _

_ **Don’t think.** _

Like a mantra the words rattled inside of Hux’s skull as he bit down as hard as he could, his teeth tearing through Snoke’s skin in a sick crunch, hitting what he hoped was an artery. He tried hard to push away the feeling of living, bleeding flesh in his mouth, of cartilage and fragile bones he hit with his teeth, crushing them. Blood quickly filled Hux’s mouth like a fountain, flowing out of the side of it but also down his throat and he had no other option than to swallow if he didn’t want to drown. Snoke’s blood tasted foul and made him instantly feel sick to his stomach but Hux couldn’t stop, wouldn’t stop. Not until Snoke lay dead beneath him. Not until he was sure the monster was dead and gone. It felt as everything was a blur as Hux pressed Snoke’s flailing arms away from him, the old man struggled but Hux found a strength inside of him he didn’t even know was there as he held him down and kept his teeth lodged in his throat.

And then all hell broke loose around him. The crowd of werewolves was wild, shouting, growling and fighting among themselves.

But Hux’s brain was only focused on burying his teeth in the throat of this man who had hurt him, who had hurt Kylo, who was the cause of both their lives getting uprooted. Nothing else mattered, not the threat of further violence, not the consequences of his actions, the only thing that mattered was separating as much precious blood from Snoke’s body to ultimately kill him. He barely felt it when Snoke’s hands transformed into claws to maim him but they could only scratch him, drawing thin lines of blood but not enough to incapacitate him. There was fur under Hux’s hands but then it was gone again as Snoke desperately tried to use his powers. But he couldn’t. Not anymore because he rapidly grew weaker, Hux’s teeth digging deeper and deeper into his flesh preventing it from being healed as he held the man down. Not much longer, he thought, he hoped.

Somehow nobody attacked him despite the noise and fighting all around him, nobody tried to drag him away from Snoke’s flailing body which grew weaker and weaker. Eventually Snoke stopped moving but Hux couldn’t be too sure even though his stomach was reeling, his head suddenly felt like splitting.

Eventually he ripped his teeth out of Snoke’s throat with an aching jaw as he pressed his hand against the man’s bloody throat which was a challenge with how much blood and torn flesh there was he couldn’t even try and find a pulse. And yet Hux was crazed enough to try. The expression on Snoke’s face was terrifying, his eyes were wide but dead, there was no light in them. Hux didn’t have time to contemplate that horror-stricken face of a dead old man for too long as his stomach lurched and he found himself heaving next to him, vomiting blood as his body rejected the foul fluids it had swallowed. His head was spinning.

Somebody touched his arm and Hux tried to violently shake them off, almost slipped and fell into the pool of blood he had vomited up. This was probably it. They would take him out now after he killed their boss.

“Shh, Hux, it’s me,” Kylo said next to him. Hux looked up to him, glad to see him. He opened his mouth but then the room tilted suddenly and Hux’s vision went blurry and eventually dark.

Hux thought he could hear Kylo’s voice while his consciousness drifted inside a dark haze. Here, nothing could hurt him, not even the faint memory of Snoke’s claws or the soreness of his muscles. But he wasn’t at peace as he drifted in and out of it. There was no rest to be had. He was sleeping, then he wasn’t but he didn’t come truly awake either. At one point Hux had the impression they were in the car but it could’ve been a dream. Kylo was there as well, his touch careful, his voice soft but Hux couldn’t make out the words or even properly feel him through the haze. He vaguely remembered drinking something. Or maybe he didn’t. How long he was in the dark void he didn’t know either. He had no fight in him left to get out of it or to even try. He was stuck.

The first time he properly opened his eyes again, Hux found himself in a clean, warm bed and for a moment he slowly stroked his palms over the covers just to feel them. They smelled fresh and felt soft under his fingers. This wasn’t a place he had ever been to, or at least he couldn’t remember if he had. But unlike waking up in a cell, this was actually nice. It felt so nice in fact, he sighed contently and let his head sink back into the pillow. There was movement to his left so Hux turned his head, a sudden feeling of apprehension overcame him. Surprisingly nothing hurt but he felt so wrung-out he knew he might just fall asleep again if it weren’t for the person sitting at his bedside. Even though she had aged gracefully since Hux had last seen her, he immediately recognized Leia Organ. Hux immediately felt at ease with her being there. His brain was still a bit fuzzy and yet he tried to say something, to at least ask about Kylo, but the moment he attempted to croak some words she shushed him quietly.

“It’s okay now. Ben brought you here,” she said and put a hand on his arm. Her touch was warm but unfortunately brought him back to the reality of the things Kylo had told him. Hux didn’t know if Kylo’s father was alright, how it even came about that Hux was in this bed at all. He couldn’t help but look at her scared, wondering if Kylo was even in the house, if maybe she only took him in but not her son. Leia’s gaze softened immediately at his obvious distress even if she couldn’t know what it was about.

“You had a very high fever for about two days,” she said. “Ben carried you to our door and begged us to help you. Of course we couldn’t say no.”

“We?” Hux said, his throat felt terrible, not only from disuse. He could only guess after throwing up Snoke’s blood he might have thrown up a couple of other times as well.

Leia smiled at him warmly.

“Han is downstairs making soup with Ben,” she said. She pulled his hand into her own and held it lightly, her fingertips pleasantly warm, the touch motherly in a way Hux hadn’t felt ever since he was a young child. Hux breathed out in relief. At least Han was alright. Both of Kylo’s parents were alright. He briefly wondered if they were still in any danger from the werewolves but if they were, maybe they wouldn’t even be here, at the Organa-Solo house. Or maybe Kylo risked his family’s safety for him. Hux would hate if it were the case.

“Thank you,” Hux whispered. After everything that had happened in the past few months, being on the run for so long, Hux finally felt himself relax even if he wasn’t sure if he was truly safe. For now, he wanted to believe everything was alright, that he could have some semblance of a normal life again. Even if it was only for a moment, for maybe one night until he and Kylo had to leave another place behind.

Leia shook her head at him with a sweet smile on her lips. Hux briefly remembered how back when he was a teen he would’ve liked nothing more than having a mother like Leia Organa. She was strict at times but fair and not often home back when Hux and Kylo were teens but when she was she made sure to be there for her son and she didn’t mind Hux being there either.

“No. Thank you. If it weren’t for you, I don’t think Ben would’ve come back. I just wished it would’ve been other better circumstances,” she said but then suddenly she pulled her hand away from Hux at a sound from the hallway outside the room.

“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to take the soup my son is carrying so he doesn’t drop it on accident,” Leia said with a mischievous smile and stood but not before adding a quiet, “He didn’t leave your side, I barely even got him to go downstairs to cook. I think he might be mad I was here to see you wake up and not him.”

Hux couldn’t help a quiet laugh that hurt his throat a bit. He could actually hear the commotion once Leia was out of the room and a second later Kylo was there.

“Hux!” he exclaimed strangely breathless and rushed to the bed, his face full of worry and his eyes overflowing with emotion as if he was about to cry.

“Hey,” Hux whispered and Kylo’s worries visibly melted away, behind him Leia had returned to the room where she put down a steaming plate of soup at the bedside table.

“Alright, you make sure he eats that,” she said to Kylo but not without a kind smile before she went back to the door.

“I’ll check back on you later,” said with a wink before closing the door behind herself.

Without even asking if he could, Kylo pulled the blanket back and got into the bed next to Hux only so he could pull him into his arms. Hux chuckled, genuinely happy as he felt Kylo’s warmth against his back and his arms around him. It bubbled out of him, together with some happy tears. Hux wiped at his face and found someone had removed his beard. It was just as well, he thought. None of this mattered, not his tears, his lack of facial hair. They were both alive and well. For once he let it all out.

“I was so worried,” Kylo whispered into his neck, his breath warm against Hux’s skin. “I didn’t even know if you’d survive.”

Hux could barely lift his arm but still somehow managed to put his hand on Kylo’s arm. He hadn’t even been aware he was supposed to be close to dying, sure, he felt like he’d been put through a grinder but at least he wasn’t in any pain. Just tired, completely wrung out as if he had done a full body workout, minus the muscle soreness. Maybe he really had been on the brink of death and didn’t even know it. There was something nagging him at the back of his mind but he couldn’t figure out what it was, like a piece to this puzzle as to why his body had reacted so violently.

Kylo slowly took up the soup while he still had Hux leaning against his side with one arm around him and offered him a spoon full. It was a delicate operation that included Kylo having to reach around without jostling Hux too much.

“It’s chicken noodle soup. My father’s recipe,” he whispered and pressed a quick kiss against Hux’s hair. Hux couldn’t help but think how that other werewolf had fed him, it had been soup too but without this care and without it smelling this nicely. This was different. Kylo was warm and for once he was patient. Sure, Hux preferred to feed himself but in his current condition he didn’t trust himself enough not to drop the spoon so he obediently opened his mouth. It was strange, the contrast between these two occasions where in one of them he could’ve fed himself if only given the opportunity and now where he didn’t have much of an option but to let somebody else do it for him. But he trusted Kylo, so this was different.

The first spoonful of soup tasted divine on his tongue. It had been so long since he had a home-cooked meal, one that had been prepared with great care. A memory from back when he was a teenager resurfaced, how both he and Ben had helped Han make his prized lasagna. Even though Leia had been working hard and wasn’t often home, at least Han had been there. Neither of them ever judged them or were weird or had some sort of lengthy talk with them about their relationship. It had been bliss. The best years of Hux’s life. All of those memories in a single spoon of soup. But this wasn’t the Organa-Solo house he knew.

“Your mother also said you were worried,” Hux muttered after he ate at least half the plate. “Did I really almost die? What happened?”

It was uncomfortable to talk but he had to know.

Kylo sighed deeply and carefully put away the soup. He didn’t speak until the plate was safely on the bedside table and after pulling the blanket over the both of them, up to Hux’s chin where it slid down again slightly.

“I don’t know if you remember,” Kylo said quietly. “But you tore out Snoke’s throat. He’s dead.”

The memory was still quite vivid in Hux’s brain even though he tried to push away knowing what it had felt like to bite through someone’s flesh and bones on purpose. Same with Snoke’s blood which he could remember the taste of. He shuddered at the memory of how vile it was.

“I know,” Hux whispered. His stomach lurched slightly when he thought about how much blood he had swallowed. At the time there hadn’t been another way in Hux’s mind, he could’ve let go and let Snoke potentially recover or swallow his blood and actually kill him, as he ended up doing. One thing still puzzled him.

“Why didn’t they try to stop me? Or came after us? Are they going to come after us again?” Hux said. He tensed up slightly at the thought. Snoke was gone, it had to be over, right? And yet, he wasn’t sure. Maybe they wanted revenge on him for killing their leader?

“It’s because their alpha died,” Kylo said. “I grabbed you and just ran while they were still trying to figure out their new pecking order. At that time you were still human so they didn’t care about you.”

Hux relaxed against Kylo, a sigh fell from his lips. At least he could rest. Until he really thought about what Kylo had said.

“What do you mean, I _was_ human?” he said and tried to turn and look at Kylo but Kylo buried his face in his neck where he took a shuddering breath.

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered against his skin. “The blood turned you. And you had a really high fever because your body was fighting it. That’s what usually happens when someone gets turned. It’s why some don’t survive.”

Hux shivered. If Kylo said anything else, it was lost to the loud static in his ears, the blood rushing in his head. This was exactly the one thing he had wanted to avoid but now it was too late. And yet, he didn’t really feel any different. Maybe Kylo was wrong and he wasn’t a werewolf? Maybe his immune system simply… resisted? Didn’t make him turn?

“Are you sure?” Hux said as he looked down to his own hands which he could barely even lift. They were shaking terribly. The hands of a killer. But this time he had done the deed himself. “Did I really become a werewolf?”

“I can tell. My mother could tell immediately. You’ll be able to tell when people are werewolves as well once you’re fully recovered,” Kylo said. “I know you didn’t want this but unfortunately there’s no way to undo it. But don’t worry, I’ll teach you everything I know. All the things Snoke taught me and more but without any of the bullshit he put me through. We’ll go as slow as you need.”

Hux leaned back against Kylo with a deep breath, his thoughts going a mile a minute. He was going to be a monster. Every full moon he would be one of them. Some sort of creature out of control.

And then he remembered how when Kylo had been fully transformed, how gentle and intelligent he had been. No. Kylo was no monster and Hux knew he wasn’t going to be one either. Even if he was still shaken, he knew he could get over it eventually and live with it. Hux had survived a lot of things in his life. He would survive being a werewolf as well. Not that he had any other option now.

“What about your pack, though?” Hux eventually said after a few minutes of quiet contemplation of his future. “Won’t they come after us again?”

Kylo chuckled a bit, jostling Hux a little.

“They’re not my pack anymore and no, they got other things to worry about. It would be stupid of them to come after us again. The only reason they did in the first place was Snoke’s obsession with me. No. They don’t care about us,” Kylo said. “And if they did, they won’t have any more leverage. You’re young and you’re going to be strong. They wouldn’t dare do anything. To them, we’re our own pack now.”

Hux went quiet as he thought some more things through, then he turned slightly in Kylo’s arms so he could get a look at him.

“Your parents really took you back, huh,” he said. The thought of Kylo reconciling with his parents gave Hux a warm feeling. Even if talking still felt uncomfortable, Hux thought he’d have to know everything right away. Mostly because being a werewolf still felt unreal to him and he wanted something to take his mind off of it, at least for now, at least while he still could. Eventually he’d have to come to terms with it.

“Oh, yeah,” Kylo said. “I think at first my mom wanted to argue but when she saw you she just ushered me inside, showed me to this guest room here and things just moved on from there. I cleaned you up, my mother called up my uncle to ask for advice on what to do. It was quite stressful to all of us. But we did our best and here you are.”

He shrugged and smiled a little. Hux could tell how relieved Kylo was, even if he didn’t say it. Hux turned to kiss Kylo on his cheek but he felt it wasn’t enough so he kissed him on his lips as well. Kylo’s large hand came up to cradle his cheek as he kissed him back, sweetly and softly. The adrenaline from earlier that rushed through him upon hearing that he had been changed forever had slowly disappeared and left him bone-tired once more. At least this time Hux felt like he could truly rest, safe in Kylo’s arms in a place where nothing bad could happen to them.

**A few months later**

Hux’s feet pounded the snow as he ran through the forest. It was beautiful, not just the view but also the smells. Everything was so alive around him, just like he himself felt alive in a way he never had in his life before. In his sleek wolf form he didn’t have to be afraid of the cold, or anything else for the matter even though he stood out from the white background by the rusty-red markings on his fur.

Every day he wanted to go further, see more, smell more, feel more under his naked paws. The freedom of it all felt incredible.

His ears perked up when he heard a howl in the distance. Hux came to a grinding halt in the snow, he tilted his head back and answered with a howl of his own before he started running towards the source of the sound. With the speed of his legs he didn’t take long to find his way there, the path leading back home.

A huge gray wolf stood there waiting for him. Hux sniffed the air, then approached him with a giddy feeling. It was Kylo, of course it was Kylo. But Hux had learned to make sure first since there were wild wolves in these woods as well even though they rarely came across them. Real wolves feared them, he had learned early on. Because they knew both he and Kylo weren’t like them. And it was just as well they kept their distance.

He approached Hux with a playful whine and pressed his face against Hux’s who didn’t hesitate to come even closer and rub his side against Kylo only to rest his head on his back. Their encounter didn’t need words, he could feel Kylo’s love by the mere look on his wolf face and the weight of his warm body against him. If Hux would ever be trapped in this form he wouldn’t even mind as long as Kylo was there with him.

Kylo broke away eventually and Hux followed him, back to their little wood cabin. Kylo was the first to transform back so he could open the door while Hux was still busy shaking out his fur before he followed along, also transforming into his nude human form. It became easier and easier to do so every day and Hux accepted the blanket Kylo handed him with a laugh. Without his wolf pelt Hux actually felt the biting cold, even with the door shut and a fire burning in their fire place.

“Did you have a good run?” Kylo said as he slipped his own clothes back on. Hux’s clothes were still on the couch, warmed by the fire, all laid out for him when he was ready to put them on. For now Hux preferred the blanket.

“I saw some squirrels today and I think I smelled a fox,” Hux said, then he moved into Kylo’s space and put both hands on his face, stroking his thumbs over his cheeks. The blanket slipped from him but it didn’t matter. The only thing that mattered to him in this moment was kissing Kylo who wrapped his arms tightly around him. He was so warm against Hux.

“Let’s put some clothes on you,” Kylo said with a laugh once they broke apart and as much as Hux hated to admit it, he agreed with Kylo.

They had been living out here in Han’s old cabin in the woods for quite a while now so Kylo could teach Hux to control his new werewolf powers. Hux was an avid learner since he hated losing control and Kylo was more than ready to teach. Kylo was surprisingly patient with him, he took his time to explain, to show and let Hux try on his own when they thought he was ready. They even got past various full moons where Hux gradually learned not to lose his mind or his body to the animal part of him. It was a delicate process, learning how not to give into the urge to become a beast for one night each month. It wounded Hux’s pride whenever he caught himself slipping, giving in to something he couldn’t control. But at least Kylo was there to keep him in check so Hux wouldn’t tear through the woods in a blind animal rage.

As Hux put on his clothes he noticed how Kylo looked at him, probably wondering if he was ready to go back into the civilized world, back to some semblance of their old lives. He would voice his question every once in a while but every time Hux would say he needed more time. He didn’t even know if he would ever be ready to go back. The freedom out here was something he had never felt in his life before. But no matter what he decided, Hux knew Kylo would wait for him to be ready. Months ago he thought their efforts to evade an angry pack of werewolves would eventually have them crumble like leaves in the Autumn wind, but out here in the wild Hux thought they might just live forever instead.

End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Btw, if you like this story please consider leaving a comment. <3 <3  
> It means the world to me to hear about your thoughts!

**Author's Note:**

> The title of this fic comes from the song '[The Woods](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0B9LnsZhtro)' by Olivver the Kid.


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